Initial attraction: Beta Male Body Language

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Really? How many signals are there?
Secondly, this guy (sorry, bad w/names) ends by reversing everything, basically saying "see all these signals of interest?. . . often they mean nothing, but thanks for watching!"

I only started looking at this area a few weeks ago, and I find myself relaxing a lot after seeing these kinda things. I'm NOT getting it wrong, I just haven't been trusting myself.
So I see no point in memorizing or even studying it. We're awesome at pattern recognition, so much so that we probably see more 'pattern changes' than the NTs see or broadcast.
I kinda suspect we're 'over analyzing' this too.

Let it flow, swoop her up, live happily ever after for about 5 years, rinse and repeat.


Ugh, Cynicism

:p... I couldn't memorize all those patterns and signals even if I tried; they're too subtle and I'd have overload in a place like that. As long as we can KIND of see them, it should eventually become easier to pick them up. Not always, but it's worth a shot.

Cleavage for men.
Cash for women.

Nobody's really going to insist that I get PC and make me say;

Sexual proliferation of the species for men.
Safe haven in child-rearing for women.
And some other piddling details too, I reckon


Disclaimer to the reader, if there is one: - this is over-simplification intended to refocus the core direction, yes I know there are exceptions all over the place.

As a science major reasonably versed in the topics of ecology and evolution (and in specific here, intra-specific competition in a variety of species including wolves), I have to say that the way the layman handles the terms "alpha male" and "beta male" really begins to annoy me. Do you guys have any idea how wrong you're getting it? In most animal species with a social hierarchy, being a beta male is pretty much just under being the top dog. Being a beta male is better described as being one of the alpha male's main honchos. You're not the pathetic loser begging for scraps, you're the guy who gets to pick after the big boss dog picks the best one first, but otherwise out of a still pretty favorable pool.

Ugh! I am fully willing to admit that this is pure Apserger's-driven nit picking here, but I just can't stand it sometimes. It's like when people can't figure out the difference between "theory" and "hypothesis", not to mention what a "conjecture" is. If it's "just a theory", no it's not, it's "just" a hypothesis. C'mon guys!

I do agree that "beta male" used to mean "loser guy begging for scraps" is completely wrong. I think it's a sad state of the world when a term, scientifically meaning "second best out of many" is generally accepted by laypeople to mean "worst." And I was about to do that, since I didn't know to begin with!! Thanks for clearing that up.

I found a good website on body language which might be helpful.
http://www.bodylanguageexpert.co.uk/

I recently read a book on body language and I will definitely further my studies of it but I am also studying assertive behaviour which can also relate to body language.

http://www.judijames.com/books_body.html

This book looks like it would be a good read for people who are more trained in body language as it goes more into specific hidden meanings in gestures instead of just stating the obvious body language arm and leg postures.

the supposed "beta" males often date and have sex and get married, just like the supposed "alpha" males (even in the animal kingdom in terms of mating. yes really). so it seems that these categories are not useful for describing or predicting social behaviour and dating prospects.

if we decide to use the phrase "alpha male" to describe men who are successful at dating, friendships, and business endeavours, we would find that the category would include all personality types - including reticent, shy, awkward men.

It's not science, it's "sciency".

I think the joke's lost on me, lulz

Omega male would perhaps be more accurate.

Charlton Heston?

No, omega is the last letter in the greek Alphabet, whereas Beta is the second, so while beta male means second in line, omega male would in this context mean last in line.

Omegas are used in such a way in science. For example, the last wolves to eat in a wolf pack are "omegas".

It's worth noting that the analogy is horribly flawed to begin with. With many (if not most) wolf packs, only the alphas even mate at all, and there's only one alpha male and only one alpha female. Not even the beta females mate. There's not even a second or third alpha female to mate!!

The whole analogy is horribly flawed and falls to absolute pieces when it's applied to human beings, and imo is giving a lot of people seriously the wrong idea about what their status in society is. And it's ALWAYS WOLVES that they're compared to! The betas in chimpanzee societies still get mates, usually behind the boss's back. So THAT's not a good analogy either!

It's not as vague as that, it's not a case of black and white, success or failure. It's not in relation to individuals themselves but in relation to how a person responds in the scenario or situation. In this case, I think it's relevant for the guy in the video because he does have chances with the other blonde girl but he messes it up by obsessing over one girl instead of realizing there are other opportunities.

There are many mistakes I can point out that I picked up just by watching Eric in the first video.

Obsessing
Analysing too much before making an approach
Trying to be too pleasing, seeking approval
Appearing too clingy
Not picking up on hints of disinterest
Ignores the hints from the blonde girl
Overcompensating by acting too cool in an attempt at false confidence

The person with the lowest attraction value at that party is David who gets slapped by the blonde girl. He makes a cold approach kiss far too early which leads to him getting slapped, he might have had a chance with the blonde girl if he had built up rapport first since she seems open to dancing with him.

If it were up to me, it would go like this:

Computer software uses algorithm to generate list of profiles by compatibility (%) based on factors such as interest, age, profession, and orientation.
Eventually, two individuals will select one another for a date.
Computer then selects meetup point that provides the best balance of favor to both individuals.
Computer generates list of topics of mutual interest.
Couple chats away and does whatever activity the computer selected for them. Small talk only occurs if both parties tick the box for that.
If both individuals are satisfied with their appreciation of the other in terms of mannerisms, topics of mutual interest, personality type, and physical appearance, then woohoo happens.
Both individuals then proceed with whatever else it is they want to do.

Just imagine how efficient it would be! There's no doubt about it, an Aspie-optimized cybernetic approach to dating would surely be superior to the silly games and fumbling of NT people!

I think there's already something like that on dating websites where it finds people you are best matched for, however I don't think it is very advanced at the moment.