The reality of getting a gf

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What do you think is the cause of these attitudes?

Us being different and they struggle to understand how to react, respond and engage. It like how to speak to someone who speaks in different language. They discriminate you by not trying hard enough to communicate with you. Its lazy, selfish and presumptive.

Do you try as hard to communicate with and understand other people as you expect them them to try with you?

Yes, it like trying to understand what they say and what they meant by asking to clarify. Like what this metaphor means? etc. People are being impatient with me and doesn't get along with me. This frets and unsettles me making me angry and frustrated.

Have you checked if any girls are flirting with you?

ya, i hate, resent having to be a dominant take charge guy, and yet us guys are supposed to embrace that, they say it will help us in other areas of our lives not just women, the reason why it bothers me is because it goes to show that life, society, expects too much of men, i got these quotes from somewhere and they make sense:

"Men
either sink or swim, Women pretty much float if that makes sense, Men
either rise to the top or sink to the bottom, meanwhile women sort of
exist happily in the middle"

I don't mind being dominant or not being dominant but I get confused. Some women say they want a guy to take charge and other women say this is sexist and reinforcing outdated gender roles. So which is it?

maybe different women have different opinions? just like how different people have different opinions

I actually like making the first move.

What I do not like is having an extremely high rejection rate for what appears to be no sensible reason.

Ideally, you'd think asking out 20 women in appropriate, polite ways when you're feeling your most confident and friendly and looking your best, you'd be able to get at least 1 date.

However, the reality seems asking out 100 women could get you only 1 or no date.

I have seen men give even worse numbers, including many saying they've asked out over 1,000 women across the years and never gotten a yes.

In the wise words of Lisa Simpson in response to her brother Bart saying "I thought you came here looking for a challenge?"

"Duh...a challenge I could do."

I'm 3 for 400.
Details are in the "there is not someone for everyone" thread, just posted at length there.

It's not hard to get dates, but you have to be realistic and ask the right people. Are you sure those girls were right for you?

1. I was speaking generally, not of my own experiences.

In real life and online, I've asked out dozens of girls. All that hard work and the two relationships I had were absolutely awful. No one deserves a toxic relationship, especially if they're a decent person themselves.

2. In what world is getting a date 'easy'?

Tell that to the man who responded to me earlier, who asked out 400 women and only for three eventual girlfriends.

3. Yes.

My dream girl is opposite sex me, nothing more.

All I ask is I am attracted to her (very easy, im attracted to 95% of women 18-25) she to me, is not overweight (I am very fit, she doesn't have to be fit just average shape), she takes care of her health, and we are 'compatible' simply meaning the relationship works.

I don't care if she has a million mental dsorders as long as they don't make her mean, don't care if she's homeless, high school dropout, even if she Nevers want to.move out,.never wants a job, never wants a HS diploma, etc. None or this matters to me, I wonder if it ever will.

I have been attracted to young women who were born with facial deformities. Doesn't matter what physical health problems she has as long as she has high survival chance and isn't bedridden or need to always be in hospital. She could be blind and deaf, wheelchair, burn face victim, every form of cancer, etc.

I don't go for girls out of my league. Ever. In fact they're often in far worse positions in life than me, and are equal in looks. They oftn have more abusive or broken home lives, often were in foster care, often fighting mental illness or substance abuse disorders, etc.

4. How do you know who the 'right' person is?

I don't even know who the right kind of friends for me are, I've been figuring that out my whole life.

I'm a skinny atheist working in IT and I noticed that I get along best with curvy religious teachers. I could ask 4000 female versions of me and get zero responses, but I chose to be open about my options and it worked much better.

That's a pretty tall order!

My last girlfriend was 29 years old, obese and didn't take of her health. I suspect she had scurvy.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to take a girl who's skinny and 18 - 25? Out of the 9 girls I've dated, only one of them matched those criteria. That's only eleven percent!

It's easy to tell whether your standards are too high. When was the last time you've been on a date?

I'd suggest volunteer work that would put you in the relative proximity of the women you wish to meet. You may be able to help out in a hospital.