I cannot believe I haven't had sex yet!

Post Reply New Topic

Yeah, I’ve seen that in action.

I would say the percentage of men who have committed an act that could have gotten them locked up had their luck run out is shockingly high. No way to know however. Jerry could have just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Consider the 1962 film The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner. IIRC that guy just happened to be the one who got caught. Millions of people are going about their lives scot free with no criminal record simply because they never got caught, and many have "reformed" in later lives and haven't committed a misdemeanor or felony in decades, however with the wrong luck (or station in life) they'd be ex-cons with a permanent record dogging their heels throughout life.

What would concern me about Jerry is the possibility he has a propensity for violence. Again, without knowing the facts, I can't assume one way or the other. He is apparently a good friend of the son of one of the OP's family friends or similar, so she should be able to find out quite a bit about him.

I would certainly endorse initially meeting in a safe setting however that would probably require support of a kind that isn't necessarily available to the OP.

^ Are you speaking from personal experience Max? I can’t say that I’ve ever committed a crime that would warrant being locked up for two years.

People should consider the repercussions of giving dangerous advice on this matter to a vulnerable person. This isn’t a movie or fairy tale. The majority of the time it’s a bad idea to date someone who is just getting out of prison. Perhaps if he rebuilds his life and proves that he’s worthy, it’ll be a different matter.

Incase they are not the sex one thought? Trying to think of a reason for your conclusions.

^ It's a good idea to make sure that you're sexually compatible with someone before marrying them.

This. ^

Even if they're both hetero and cis, things can go way wrong in terms of sexual compatibility.

^ Once again, absolutely.

Even if he wasn't an as*hole, my husband and I wouldn't have been sexually compatible. If a couple doesn't like any of the same things in the bedroom, it's not going to be good for the marriage overall.

I can't offer statistics however it's my impression that saving sex for marriage is a popular concept on WP.

100%

My guys need to be assertive but not in the standard way.

They have to be into my mental arousal more than my physical.
I mean, physical is good too, but they have to know my mind.

I'm fussy about touch because of my sensory issues.
I won't get into detail but I have specific needs.
Same with scent, sound, and all my other senses.

So far I've found one person in my entire life who gels.
It's a match made in heaven.
No one else was worth five minutes of my time.

I haven't yet found the right person. I regret all the sex I've had in my life, except for the time I conceived my son. I'm sure it sucked, too, but it was worth it.

I had to chug Tequila and think about someone else, to conceive my daughter. lol

There was no way otherwise.

We hadn't done it since we conceived my son, but I knew I wanted him to have a sibling before I got divorced.

It was a "now or never" thing because I knew the timing was right.

Thank God it worked.

If you guys are right about Jerry and he turns out not to be a good guy perhaps I can meet someone in Day Program

This would make everyone feel better about me and my journey to finding love!

Do you go to a day program? Is it for people with autism and/or other needs? You would probably be more likely to find a good guy there than prison.

Not yet but after I see the doctor Monday for my TB shot I will be!

Yes

Unless Jerry can prove his worth and prove he is a good guy Day Program is my best chance at finding a soulmate

My advice would be to avoid telling anyone you're a virgin, even when you start dating.
That's none of anyone's business but your own.

Some people are weirdly interested in that and they'll want to exploit it.
They don't realise no one in the history of the world has had sex with a virgin.
The moment it starts, she's not a virgin anymore.

Women don't get to keep this creepy title either, if all things go as planned.
In other words, don't let it be your defining feature.

You might want to talk about the situation with Jerry to a counselor that you're currently seeing or one in your day program. They might be able to give you some good advice that's relevant to your situation. You might have more in common with people you meet at your day program.