What are the odds of...

Post Reply New Topic

well, i can tell you that appearing shallow, materialistic and narrowminded will not get you well liked either. hell. i'd rather be friends with a troll, a gamer or a slacker any day, than with someone who could only like someone for what's on your list. i, at least, like to think that i can look past those things.
you should try it some time.

What are you talking about? This forum is chock full of math and science majors, some of which are active researchers.

I like talking to you, and it's obvious that many others do too.

Thanks. But I don't think I had ever really fit in here, even before this thread, and I had been on here for almost 4 years.

And I do want to apologize for the things I said here. These aren't things I normally say. I do know I offended people, and I am truly sorry.

I tried to help people as much as I could over the years that I had been here, but now, I just don't feel comfortable here anymore.

You mean I actually have a chance at having friends?

Yesterday someone asked me what I was doing - that is: spending hours connected to the messenger account I had created just to talk with whom is now my ex - that is: an account with just one contact; a grey icon that never goes green because the relationship is over - and the funny toddler avatar I used during the last months staring back at me like a mirror of sorts - gives me both a strange pavlovian feel I'd be getting a reply (icon still gray) and a sense of sheer pointlessness. It's an awesome pic. . . After a long pause I just replied the truth: I don't really have a goal.

Anyway. . . the OP should allow himself to desire whoever - how-ever - he wishes. That in itself should be a pleasure. It doesn't really change anything; not being insulted by a crowd in some forum is not worth it. I lowered my standards once and most likely I only managed to put myself in actual danger - then my ex found me and I hadn't done anything to deserve that.

What is truly at stake here? All along women have never been the point. It all comes down to men at some internet forum squabbling who's better - in ridiculously dishonest ways. . . Thanks to the internet, uneducated people I'd never have to meet can come tell me, they are, after all, more of a man than I am - whatever that means.
Not a funny confident guy? Tough luck; a life of sheer psychological agony and soltitude - spending most birthdays and Christmas alone after a certain age. I tried to ignore that but it spreads like a cancer.
. . .but what part of not being a funny confident guy that entertains women did you not understand?
That's what you get. . .
Obviously. . .

WHAT are we trying to relate to anyway??????

I'd like a girl that's upper-middle class too. Otherwise the incompatibility issues will give me a meltdown and I'm tired of being judged as shallow just cause I'm not a bum - also the fear of being secretly exploited. Whoah! That sounds so great! . . .and neatly thought too!
At least leave me my dreams. . .

Tim, you're just saying what's on your mind. That's fine. We're all learning here. Some people were shocked by what you said, and you've probably learned some new things about how your ideals come across to others. There's not a single poster here who doesn't know what it's like to end up looking like a jerk without intending to offend.

You fit in. I hope you won't be too uncomfortable for long.

I appreciate the fact the he is so honest about it, he's actually saying what he's thinking rather than bullshitting just to please the crowd. If most people said what they really thought all the time it'd be easier to get to the issue. I've seen too much of Tim on this site to believe that he is a bad guy deep down.

And Tim, that list does need a little work but you don't have to throw it out altogether. If the woman you find can really connect to you it won't matter if you like the same TV shows. Maybe you should reduce that requirement to "is willing to put up with me watching South Park, or enjoy watching it together with me" that will open up the pool a little bit and still weed out the b*****s that would be too controlling to even let you watch the show.

My advice is to just go out and meet women whether they meet all your criteria or not. Even if she isn't like the last one you might find one you like.

That's what my fear is in dating someone who was conservative and/or evangelical. Those things were connected.

One of the priests at the church that I went to growing up confessed to me that South Park was a guilty pleasure of his. Try not make assumptions until you know for sure that she would do that.

A little off-topic, but I wanted to point out your awesome current post count.

Thanks!

(not so awesome anymore, though)

But I still feel like I'm instantly blackballed on here, despite the apology, because now, this is the only thing people on here will know me for.

Nah. People forget things, plus you'll always be showing your good traits, too.

Er, that came out wrong. >_< What I mean is I doubt anybody will concentrate on this incident, even if they disagree with you, when you're constantly being so helpful and nice.

You'll forever be best known for the "welcome to WPs"

but that's the thing...i don't think you are a bad guy, tim. it just frustrates me when i see you guys limiting yourselves to "i'll only like girls like this" lists...i'm sure there are other things you would value higher than large breasts? how about loyalty? compassion? honesty? what about morals and values? are they not worth more than a $50,000 income? that's all i was meaning. if you only focus on those specific things on your list and have no flexibility, you are only going to disappoint yourself in the long run. there is someone out there for you...just don't over-look her because you are looking for something that may not exist.

veresae had a thread in which he asked what you want vs. what you need. all i'm saying is take a look at your list...are these the things you really need in a woman? or are they what you want? it does make a difference.

and i wish you nothing but luck in your search. and don't leave here...i know i would miss you. just because you haven't made a ton of friends doesn't mean anything. people still enjoy your company when you're here. and yes, you were one of the first to welcome me here, don't think i have forgotten that. it meant a lot to me who didn't know if i would be welcomed here...don't ever think that your little actions have no effect on people.

*hugs*

Thanks.

I'll keep your advice in mind, but I don't want to post on this anymore.

What makes you think a NT would not accept you for who you are? Some can be quite shallow, but there's a few out there that are not like that at all.