Nice Guys and Love, what's your take on the issue
i will from my own observations will say that it is easyer for a "jerk" to be a hit with the ladies than it is for a "nice guy"
i hav actualy played both rolls in a sort of experiment in high school
and the reason is simply two things
1. illusions of confidence
beinging polite to people in many cases makes u look like ur less confident than ur ruder counterparts y becuz politeness exposes u emotionaly and when exposed most men act "shy" while if ur openly saying u dont like this person or this girl is unattractive ur not going to be shy about it
it is for alot of ppl to easy to be rude becuz rudeness doesnt leave u exposed and there for u having nothing to be shy about...this creates an illusions of confidence
2. the same old same old pattern
the same thing gets boreing time after time after time....but we also start paying less attention to things or actions when they happen over and over again, so if ur a jerk and ur constantly saying offensive things to ur gf but every once in a while u take her out on a date or hold the door open for her, she will remember that one action over all the meanness that u give her, y becuz it stoud out and things that stand out hav more meaning and arnt boreing and becuz it was a "nice guy" act the jerk has just won brownie points
now ur the "nice guy" allways telling how pretty a girl looks, allways holding the door open for her, but then u hav a bad day and u say something silently offensive to her, this stands out and there for makes u seem like the worst person in the world, or lets say u never offensive things to her and ur nice always and always and always
with u being nice always u now hav set the bar pretty high for urself and thus u become boreing
now im just a guy, and im not proud of walking on the "jerk" side of Manhood, and hav since stopped, but what i had learned is that the biggest problem "nice guys" hav is they make a girl there entire world devoting to much time on her, girls want to join ur world not become it
thats probably how majority of females feel about the issue, i know most of the women i know would say exactly that
and honestly theres nothing wrong with it, if jerks make u happy.....if not then u might need to do some soul searching and find out what u realy want and be attracted to that
its not that hard to change what ur attracted to, humans make it sound like its impossible but its not
i was allways very attracted to manipulative women, and it didnt make me happy nor was it good for me,
so i dug deep and figured out what i wanted and changed what i was attracted to and now when i find a manipulative woman im instantly turned off
but if mean, overconfident men make u happy(and there are women who are that way) then u hav nothing to worry about
Nothing to be ashamed of, I think it's perfectly normal for most women to be this way. It probably won't end well, but that's OK as long as you don't expect it to and just enjoy it for what it is, there's plenty of other overconfident jerks where that came from...
I might have figured it otu. I think I like the overly confident type because they are more insistent. I am very shy kid, so I always run away from people and will do anything to avoid seeing them. Particularly when I like them.
So I guess its the only the overly confident types that will literally chase you. They just will not believe that you are not interested in them unless you are gay or married or blind. And not even then.
And being the shy insecure kiddo that I am, whenever any guy seems to show interest in me (and this usually will need to be very obvious for me to notice, as in chasing.) I will then become obsessed with them and start doing all types of stupid things for them.
Maybe that is why there are so many nice shy girls with mean bastards...
Or maybe I am just kinda tipsy and should not do any soul searching in this state of mind... Red wine be gonee!
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The stars look very different today.
lmao!! yeah probably not the best idea
i know my problem tends to be i never give up on a girl, and hav chased a girl to the moon and back only to end up on my ass at the end
but who knows maybe u like the persistent type, however i can asure u not all of them are jerks so ur good
Fatal-Noogie
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@segan
I can sort-of sympathize with having soft spot for the rude boys because I have a soft spot for rude gals.
I develop crushes too easily with girls who mock or insult me. The ones I asked rejected my advances.
The problem is that unlike the rude boys, the rude gals weren't doing it to pursue affection.
They just saw me as a cute little clown for their amusement. (If you saw me back then you'd understand.)
My point being, I sympathize with loving those who try to hurt you.
Sometimes we can't control our emotions. Cupid is such a dick!
[Red wine is not involved in this message. Amber ale is my poison for the night.]
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Fatal-Noogie
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truer words have never been spoken
I would have to agree. Cupid is quite rude.
I say we kidnap him, and knock some sense into the bastard.
agreed....(grabs torch and pitchfork) lets get this sucker
(Our mythological mission sounds like a premise for a Twilight Zone episode. )
_________________
Curiosity is the greatest virtue.
truer words have never been spoken
I would have to agree. Cupid is quite rude.
I say we kidnap him, and knock some sense into the bastard.
agreed....(grabs torch and pitchfork) lets get this sucker
(Our mythological mission sounds like a premise for a Twilight Zone episode. )
height requirement? nah forming a mob is fun for all ages, bring the kids too well just give them flashlights and forks u know for safety reasons
Fatal-Noogie
Veteran
Joined: 28 Oct 2007
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,069
Location: California coast, United States of America, Earth, Solar System, Milky Way, Cosmos
truer words have never been spoken
I would have to agree. Cupid is quite rude.
I say we kidnap him, and knock some sense into the bastard.
agreed....(grabs torch and pitchfork) lets get this sucker
(Our mythological mission sounds like a premise for a Twilight Zone episode. )
height requirement? nah forming a mob is fun for all ages, bring the kids too well just give them flashlights and forks u know for safety reasons
If kids were in the mob Cupid would be thrashed and pulverized beyond recognition. Think of all the cootie-phobia. The forensics experts would have a field day trying to collect all the pieces.
_________________
Curiosity is the greatest virtue.
truer words have never been spoken
I would have to agree. Cupid is quite rude.
I say we kidnap him, and knock some sense into the bastard.
agreed....(grabs torch and pitchfork) lets get this sucker
(Our mythological mission sounds like a premise for a Twilight Zone episode. )
height requirement? nah forming a mob is fun for all ages, bring the kids too well just give them flashlights and forks u know for safety reasons
If kids were in the mob Cupid would be thrashed and pulverized beyond recognition. Think of all the cootie-phobia. The forensics experts would have a field day trying to collect all the pieces.
well from my experince short people can kick ass too, so i dont see y not lol hell it might throw Cupid off
and when dealing with mythological beingings, u need all the advantage u can get
These are the reasons why nice guys fail I believe. But I also have another belief and I'm curious as to how many agree with me on this. Since nice guys are often rejected because of their shyness, girls tend to go out with guys that exude confidence, and who also tend to be jerks after a while. This is my opinion, I think that girls who reject nice guys and date jerk-type guys more than deserve the heartache they will eventually feel, whether it be a bad breakup, being used, or whatever else. I'm not saying that every girl has to date one particular nice guy, but I'm saying that if a girl rejects a nice guy for a jerk, isn't it fitting that she pay the consequence of her choice? Kind of like the physics principle "For every reaction there is a opposite and equal reaction"? Just my thoughts, tell me what you guys think
I agree with you entirely sir, however another way to put it is : A nice guy is like the pot of gold at the end of the smoldering rainbow of as*holes. But they do deserve it yes, most women state they want a nice, caring, loving, attentive man, and than they go and date some asshat and end up getting hurt... well i tried to warn ya but eh you know
truer words have never been spoken
I would have to agree. Cupid is quite rude.
I say we kidnap him, and knock some sense into the bastard.
agreed....(grabs torch and pitchfork) lets get this sucker
(Our mythological mission sounds like a premise for a Twilight Zone episode. )
height requirement? nah forming a mob is fun for all ages, bring the kids too well just give them flashlights and forks u know for safety reasons
If kids were in the mob Cupid would be thrashed and pulverized beyond recognition. Think of all the cootie-phobia. The forensics experts would have a field day trying to collect all the pieces.
well from my experince short people can kick ass too, so i dont see y not lol hell it might throw Cupid off
and when dealing with mythological beingings, u need all the advantage u can get
Lol Nice any room for someone who knows how to handle a blade, cook, and first aid? Plus Cupid deserves to get what is coming to him
Last edited by Zelus on 08 Sep 2011, 12:08 am, edited 1 time in total.
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