Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

What to expect?

Page 7 of 10 [ 145 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Kilroy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Apr 2007
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,549
Location: Beyond the Void

12 Jan 2011, 10:29 pm

well you need 2 things
motivation and rat poison



wefunction
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,486

12 Jan 2011, 11:05 pm

nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,593
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic police state called USA

13 Jan 2011, 12:57 am

wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


Volodja
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Nov 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 814

13 Jan 2011, 3:02 am

Unfortunately the chances are you're gonna experience a lot of problems. As for what, it depends on your AS and how it manifests itself in you personally. Look at how your AS affects you in other aspects of your life, then apply that to a dating/relationships scenario. Obviously the main problems are social/communication. Shyness also seems to pretty common

You might be lucky though and not have too many problems. Good luck anyway



rako
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2011
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 4

13 Jan 2011, 7:01 am

emlion wrote:
You won't find a girl if you rush.
We know if you're just picking any girl because you want a girlfriend. :roll:
You need to wait until you find someone special - not just someone to fill the gap.


That Is really good advice which I can think a lot of people can use.

This may be the young and naive part of me but for the lucky few relationships can be very rewarding. Unfortunately it is incredibly difficult for many include NT's and it may not work 1000 times but on the 1001st time who knows it may make up for everything else.



wefunction
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,486

13 Jan 2011, 7:13 am

nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I had recommended it for someone who is currently in college and has intentions of applying his degree to a job after graduation. Not only was I unaware of whether or not he could afford the service himself or if a Third Party could pay, it is a viable option if he continues to face difficulties after graduation.

You can get much, much better than minimum wage if you're an aspie! There's aspies working for NASA! Don't spread misinformation.



Jamesy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Oct 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,329
Location: Near London United Kingdom

13 Jan 2011, 9:57 am

Volodja give me examples of a few problems then?

As for me? Well sometimes i have been told i have 'bad' AS and other times people have told me that i am completely normal and it is only very mild.

hte problem withe me is that i do have very bad anxiety issues and do get stressed easily. i also walk like a moron because i am very insecure of my height of 5ft10.



MidlifeAspie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,016

13 Jan 2011, 11:00 am

nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,593
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic police state called USA

13 Jan 2011, 11:06 am

MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.

People that successful are probably not likely to need a Life Coach thou


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


wefunction
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,486

13 Jan 2011, 11:14 am

nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.

People that successful are probably not likely to need a Life Coach thou


Or they already used one so they didn't use AS as an excuse to fail without ever trying.

Why are you so adamantly against the idea of someone getting help to better themselves? It's one thing to keep yourself down but you're advocating others keep themselves down. Why?



MidlifeAspie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,016

13 Jan 2011, 11:32 am

wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.

People that successful are probably not likely to need a Life Coach thou


Or they already used one so they didn't use AS as an excuse to fail without ever trying.

Why are you so adamantly against the idea of someone getting help to better themselves? It's one thing to keep yourself down but you're advocating others keep themselves down. Why?


You can't state that it won't work, because I am speaking directly to you from experience. My own experience. My life coach is the only reason I am where I am today, so I married her :)



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,593
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic police state called USA

13 Jan 2011, 11:37 am

wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.

People that successful are probably not likely to need a Life Coach thou


Or they already used one so they didn't use AS as an excuse to fail without ever trying.

Why are you so adamantly against the idea of someone getting help to better themselves? It's one thing to keep yourself down but you're advocating others keep themselves down. Why?

I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


MidlifeAspie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,016

13 Jan 2011, 11:43 am

nick007 wrote:
I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


Who foots the bill then?



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,593
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic police state called USA

13 Jan 2011, 11:51 am

MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


Who foots the bill then?

It should be part of a social program that helps people with disabilities including people with AS find & maintain employment. The extra tax money that comes in from having more & better paid workers would cover the cost


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


MidlifeAspie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,016

13 Jan 2011, 12:05 pm

nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


Who foots the bill then?

It should be part of a social program that helps people with disabilities including people with AS find & maintain employment. The extra tax money that comes in from having more & better paid workers would cover the cost


Where does the "extra tax money" come from? In order for the taxes to be extra these would have to be jobs that did not exist before. Are you suggesting that new industries be formed that create jobs that are better attuned to an Aspie labor market? What industry would that be? The industry and the jobs would need to come before or at the same time as the program to fill these jobs.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,593
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic police state called USA

13 Jan 2011, 12:19 pm

MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


Who foots the bill then?

It should be part of a social program that helps people with disabilities including people with AS find & maintain employment. The extra tax money that comes in from having more & better paid workers would cover the cost


Where does the "extra tax money" come from? In order for the taxes to be extra these would have to be jobs that did not exist before. Are you suggesting that new industries be formed that create jobs that are better attuned to an Aspie labor market? What industry would that be? The industry and the jobs would need to come before or at the same time as the program to fill these jobs.

The jobs will not come if their are not people who are trained or capable of doing em.
I'm going to let this drop because this belongs on another section


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition