Guys only want one thing

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The more I read threads in this forum, the more I feel like I am expected to be the scum of the Earth just because I'm male. It appears increasingly unlikely that someone in my area will recognize I'm not out for sex, that the idea of cheating makes me feel physically ill, and that I will not have sex with anyone until there is a committed relationship and a strong emotional connection. I've had no issue denying the blatant offers for sex I've had (no, they weren't prostitutes), and I've been on the receiving end of being lied to and lead-on and would never want someone else to feel like that.

It's becoming absurdly depressing as this idea that others just see me as a walking penis with no brain continues to be affirmed to me. I have grown a greater sense of understanding of feminist activism, since I am certainly understanding what it feels like to be sexually stereotyped - it's a pretty crappy feeling.

I do appreciate that someone on this forum did send me a note that she understood my frustration and recognized I was different, though (you know who you are!) But the frustration is still there as stereotyping remains in abundance.

In my personal experience, it's woman that tend to cheat. I've been cheated on by two different girlfriends that I'm aware of. As far as my friends or class mates, it seems like both men and women cheats.

I am like Khoma, I am not sex crazed and I certainly don't talk to women for the sake of getting in their pants. I don't even understand the concept of speaking to someone for the sole purpose of sex. That's just stupid and a waste of my time and energy.
I need to have a close emotional connection with someone and a lot of trust in order for me to go that far. It's extremely hard for me to trust anyone and I am usually suspicious of peoples' motives.

I have never cheated on anyone - physically or emotionally. I like long stable relationships, unfortunately being so young most girls around me say that's what they want too, and then they behave to the contrary almost to the point where I refuse to be in a relationship with any woman that's younger than 21.

It just seems like no one really respects anyone anymore, or treats people with the basic decency you would treat a human being. Guys laugh and talk about how stretchy or stanky or ratched some girls' p***y is, and girls will laugh and joke and make fun of how small a guys' dick is. Its' just atrocious. I always just sit there quietly, looking horrified at how disgusting these people are behaving and if I'm sitting with a group of girls, crossing every single one of them off of my list if one of them ever asked me out.

Khoma wrote:

Currently going for nearly two years, not counting anything during high school or before that.

2 years is still a honeymoon period so its invalid to say that you arent bored with it.
and how many flings did you have before that...
did something drastic happen that you decided to stick to one relationship for a longer time...

its kind of unusual.....and even in a steady relationship men tend to cheat

It is a shame that the good guys get caught in the firing line of all this, and I do agree that both men and women cheat.

Coming from a woman who's learned much from this topic in my life, the only reason I think that there is such a strong underlying hatred for those men who are bad to woman, is because most of them do it in such a brutal and henious way, that a woman is given very little choice but to feel rather bitter about the whole thing. My experience with it isn't simply that some men only want sex, but that some men are willing to play with emotions, and string along a girl for days, months, years. That's the part that hurts most.

Not only that, but young woman see sex as a rather sacred act, where as some men simply see it as a hurdle, or milestone, that needs to be overcome in order to gain the respect of their peers. This puts added pressure on men to sleep with woman, and added pressure on young woman to be wary for those men.

And again, this isn't all men I'm talking about, but real men have admitted this, either directly to me, or through media, or otherwise. I've had one guy tell me his story; he told me he wasn't that kind of guy, and he believed it with every fibre of his being. The added reason as to why he felt so repulsed by those bad men, was because many men in his own family were guilty of such acts, and were proud of it, which sickened him.

He made it his mission to fight the stereotype, only to learn after he had 'lost' his virginity, and fought hard to remain with the same woman for 4 years, he was shocked to learn that he too started to notice his desires were changing. He fought hard against those feelings, and often showered his girlfriend with gifts, from the guilt he felt from his unwanted feelings. He was devastated, but in the end could not fight his natural desires any longer; his own body had betrayed him.

Again, I'm not a guy, so I can't offer my opinion on this feeling, but that was his account of the whole event.

Is wanting good sex still only one thing?