If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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I lost my virginity at the age of 27, wait, what was the original post in this topic again...? /finishes this post so that I can go to read the first page of this thread...

If you believe it's in the hands of the gods, how will you ever get a girlfriend? You do need to actively talk to people if you want to meet a girlfriend so I wouldn't take such a fatalistic attitude or you're going to end up alone.

You should be trying to get some experience, but also, you should NOT base the value of your life on whether you have a relationship or not. Many people put that as the primary focus of their life, and I also once worked towards that goal, but ever since I recovered my pre-birth/pre-earth-life memories, I have more interest and place more importance on other matters now, but that is neither here nor there as it would be several book-volumes to explain.

I am still not in any relationship by the way and I'm older than you are. I am NOT depressed or upset about it either as I prefer having more free time available to myself. I wouldn't trade the knowledge/wisdom that I've gained just to have a girl-friend (and in fact the wisdom/knowledge is what gives me a lot of my confidence in knowing that I can get one quickly anyway if I bothered to put forth some effort and actually go out-side rather than mostly doing my full-time-research activities).

Also, life is a karmic-system, and I know this from a lot of my researching and studying up on the subject of the para-normal and para-psychology, and further even into reading the contents of http://www.the-testament-of-truth.co.uk/ and http://www.truthism.com/ and http://www.falsebeliefs.com/ amongst other paradigm-expanding publications combined with my own personal-experiences and even field-testing of the claims made by a variety of publications (what lead me into The Testament of Truth was a transition of self-questioning after reading the NDE-account of Daniel Rosenblit & knowing what I know about the history of humanity, anthropology, psychology, sociology, etc).

Ultimately... virtually everything that everybody in this universe believes is a false or contaminated belief to greater or lesser degrees. You will have to go through some "initial suffering" before you gain your "happiness-freedom" as explained in The Testament of Truth but it is SO worth it to achieve the kind of Divine-Protection (like I seem to have apparently) that even police won't bother you if you're "driving" around without any licenses.

Yes, but there's a difference between being in a social environment to meet people in general, and being in a social environment to meet a woman.

This is why I don't go to bars (one of the reasons anyway.) When guys are in active pursuit mode it's creepy to me, NT or autistic.

It's like a job interview.

Fatalistic is an interesting word. If you're meaning that controlling variables leads to success, I would disagree. I prefer to roll the dice.

Not for me it's not not. I can't just get a date through natural chance. If I don't actively look for one, I don't get a date.

People sense when someone is hunting. Of course single's bars provide an environment where both genders are looking to hook up. But they're meat markets.

If all you're thinking about is trying to get a girlfriend, obviously that's going to make you appear desperate but just because you go out to a bar with friends doesn't mean you couldn't talk to a girl while you're there and ask for her number while you're enjoying a drink with you're friends. And obviously there's an element of chance involved but you're likely to succeed if you roll the dice more often.

Yes, I have sometimes scared girls off because they figured out I was hunting. But on the other hand I've also been in situations were hunting was appropriate for the time and place and the girl didn't mind. It can work in one's favour.

yes that's why I said before I would rather have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, I don't want my first girlfriend to become my wife

of course though I am hit negatively by all those things. I don't fit in too well in male dominated jobs. I'm too feminine and weak in their eyes.




yes its so great and empowering having to put your emotions out there to women just so they can slam it down and reject you over and over.

that may be how they worked in the past before technology and the internet. nowadays people work too much and social bonding is so rough having to navigate through all the landmines(creepy, sexual harassment, sexist, etc) dating sites started out for inoverts but now is mostly used by the outgoing types who work too much. dating has really changed from what other people talked about. its not ok to ask a woman at your crafting club out anymore.

how is waiting around for guys to ask you out stressful?
stressful is having to deal with anxiety, to ask a girl out and after you spent so much time making it just right and emotionally putting yourself out there she rejects you for no reason and that's the end of it for her, you however have to no deal with the emotions and depression of being rejected yet again. yep that girl has it rough, to here it was a minor inconvenience that barely shows up as a blip on her life. she waits and rejects til the right guy comes along. and she gets to judge hundreds of guys and tell them they suck. now thats sounds empowering you get to judge others and make them feel like trash. so you kinda get to decide others lives. not saying you personally do but women in general.

I'd love to have hundreds of women asking me out.

being the one who has to ask out women and get rejected beats people down til they feel hopeless piece of trash that should just die. others get bitter and have resentment towards women. others still actually kill themselves, but at least their free.



pretty sure thats just a generational gap thing. men of my generation are mostly ok with it and would welcome it. they have dances in schools where only the girls can ask guys to the dance. hopefully this keeps up and generations down the line won't have to deal with this stuff anymore. none of which helps me. probably only 10% of my generation women would ask a guy out while the other 90% still follow the old ways.



wonder why i don't find somone then. o.O I assume all women hate and think me worthless as they've told me. so I don't hunt as you say women while out and about.

i avoid bars cause I don't drink , they tend to be loud, and lots of drunk people are there for some odd reason
only been to one once after work. co worker invited me and I'd never been and also didn't want to be rude. food was good and cheap but I'd rather not go again. I'd rather go to a nice restaurant hopefully one that is quieter. not that I do the single guy eating alone causes everyone to stare at him. it makes me uncomfortable being watched. nope eating out is a group or couple thing.

^^ He's making sense.

Btw Alex, androbot01 is a she, so she wouldn't relate to your post, in a bar she just needs to sit and guys will come to talk to her.
But of course, going to the bar or to any social environment alone would be considered a non-fatalistic active move by itself, so the more she meets people there higher the chances she finds someone she clicks with - so the same dice rule.

For no reason? The only reason she needs is that she's not attracted to you. This is an example of the "shopping" attitude. There is no currency of love.


It really is.



Which is why I can't go to a bar by myself. I wish I could. But men assume that women on their own in bars want to be picked up.

How is complaining that girls don't ask you out *helping*?

Why aren't you doing something, anything other than whatever it is that has resulted in you having zero dates?

How is taking all the rejection *personally* helping?

Has is occurred to you that *everybody* gets rejected?

And I'm guessing *most* of your rejection has come in the low-effort realm of online dating... where it takes a nanosecond to send a message, that you send the same message to a zillion girls and then cry woe-is-me, SO YOU CAN CRY woe-is-me when they don't respond!

Pathetically minimal effort overtures = pathetically minimal effort rejections

was responding to ann. it helps to relieve the anxiety, stress and depression.

what am i suppose to do besides resorting to kidnaping women, which is wrong and illegal. but short of forcing a woman not much I can do.

rejection is anything but not personal. its someone telling you you are a bad person to them. they judge you you not your car or work but you as a person and say nope. thats about as personal as one can get in life. not quite the same as a job not choosing you cause you lack experience but are a good person

not nearly as much though. they tend to get results too. its why others call it the numbers game. so if they get rejected 20 times and accepted 1 time they are good. all I get is hundreds and hundreds of rejections and no acception. apply that to anything in life and it'll get to people. if you failed to ride a bike 2,000 times I bet you'd just stop trying to ride a bike. theres only so much failure people can handle.

sending a Hi message might take a nano second, a proper message takes 10+ minutes per message. times hundreds and hundreds . and you have to do that cause short messages get ignored.
nope each message was unique per person. I spend time reading their profile and typing a message per each person.

you have a stick up your butt towards men. it can't possible be a generally good person who tries hard at something and fails. nope you either try hard and succeed or you didn't try and fail. why don't you stop prejudging people with no knowledge of them. its not a nice personality trait.

same as people who think poor people don't work their butts off, because they want to live in a world where hard work always pays off. reality is life is s**t and there's no logical pattern. hard work can lead to failure more often then it leads to success. you can do every step correct and right and still not get what you wanted.

I don't mind when girls reject me. I don't mind when I ask a girl out and she says no. What I do mind is that when I ask a girl out and she acts like I'm a creep for asking. Yes that actually has happened to me. It's like I'm expected to know what the answer is going to be before I ask the question. That's why I'm reluctant to ask girls out in meatspace. That's why I only ask out girls I met in meatspace after slow deliberation.

And on sites like WP and Yahoo Answers, they're like "Hey, just ask the girl out. Maybe she'll say no but it won't matter". If only that was true. If only a girl who doesn't want to date a guy could just say "No thank you" and then I could say "Fine, no problem".

But sometimes what happens is the girl acts like I'm a total creep. Maybe I come across that way because I'm not playing but the unwritten NT rules. I try to find out what the rules are but all I get is PUAs peddling their nonsense. They only want to sell books, not to inform.

Some of the nicer girls try to let me down gently but always in an indirect way. They say they're busy or something. This can be confusing because I think maybe they won't be busy next week when really they just don't want to go out with me. They think this is the kindest way they can let me down. Really, the kindest way they could let me down would be to say no but without saying I'm a creep afterwards.

Probably the reason why girls think I'm a creep is because I don't play the rules of NT-land (AKA Earth). When I'm talking to a girl I try to pick up on her signs on interest and I see false positives and miss real positives, etc. Maybe the girl thinks I'm a creep because I ask her out after she's already sent a dozen nonverbal signs of disinterest that I wasn't able to perceive.

That's why I don't ask out any girl I like in meatspace at a moments notice. Even though all these self-help sights say "If you like a girl, ask her out straight away and everything will be fine" it doesn't work that way. You can't solve all your problems through optimism and self-affirmation. You need planning and deliberation.

my husband, 64 years old, never has asked women out. his relationships, including ours, were initiated by women. when i found this out, i pointed out to him that he'd have a better chance of being with someone he preferred if he did some asking. he remained happy with his tactics.