DeepBlueLake wrote:
You're expected to show your intentions honestly from the beginning. And if that means getting shot down in front of a bar full of people, so be it. Women don't give themselves to a man who's scared of that. To us, the idea that you have to be combative and uncompromising with a potential lover seems crazy. Yet that's how nature designed it.
I'm sure many of us in this situation have
thought we were being honest.
Also, there's some possibilities for why the guy might not be quite so direct right off the bat. Some might be concerned with the risk of losing a friend if the answer is no. That, and this basically means "If you already know the person, nothing can come of it. Period." Well, not all of us are happy with that rule. Maybe the guy realizes just how great of a person the girl is
once he gets to know her, maybe he didn't have time for a relationship initially, but now he does. There's all sorts of reasons that a guy might not charge in head-first that
aren't simply because he is a "coward."
I wouldn't date a woman I didn't know at least a little. Perhaps the solution to my problems is to convince total strangers that I'm a jerk and then I'll get all the women I want. This is why I wish there were a way of becoming asexual without side effects.