auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,574
Location: the island of defective toy santas
19 Jun 2020, 6:29 am
19 Jun 2020, 9:22 am
Gentleman Argentum
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Joined: 24 Aug 2019
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 973
Location: State of Euphoria
19 Jun 2020, 4:45 pm
19 Jun 2020, 9:24 pm
20 Jun 2020, 12:01 am
20 Jun 2020, 12:29 am
20 Jun 2020, 12:33 am
Gentleman Argentum wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
^^on that subject, let me relate my own story of misconstrued innocence- i complimented a patient on her artfully applied nail polish, whereupon she turned beet red and boiling mad and immediately called my supervisor to complain loudly. they read me the riot act and i told them they cut me to the quick, i had no intention of "harassing" anybody and that in the future i would not say a thing even if their hands were on fire. they did not appreciate that last bit.
It must have been the wording, something was misinterpreted.
I have, thank God, avoided altercations with women-or-men over any perceived sexual interest, at work.
In all cases, I assume the other person is NOT interested.
If I begin to suspect someone is getting uncomfortable (usually woman) then I back off and try to stay away from them. With distance, comes safety. They forget or forgive or both.
However, had a woman at church, or rather her boyfriend, get upset with me. I had not said or done anything inappropriate. She performed a magic ritual. The next Sunday he got really hostile with me, he was clearly jealous.
I think it was the tone of voice I used when I thanked her for the ritual she performed. Too friendly? I do not know. Maybe something in my eyes? Sometimes I think we may come across as too friendly, too genuine, too whatever. Do you think so?
I abandoned the church and never went back. They were there first, after all. Their church, not mine.
NTs often/usually have trouble with openness and honesty.
Give them a miss, if you can.
Erm,
Is your wife one?
20 Jun 2020, 12:36 am
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,574
Location: the island of defective toy santas
20 Jun 2020, 1:32 am
nick007
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Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,650
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA
20 Jun 2020, 3:59 am
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,574
Location: the island of defective toy santas
20 Jun 2020, 6:08 am
Gentleman Argentum
Veteran
Joined: 24 Aug 2019
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 973
Location: State of Euphoria
20 Jun 2020, 8:13 pm
Gentleman Argentum
Veteran
Joined: 24 Aug 2019
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 973
Location: State of Euphoria
20 Jun 2020, 8:34 pm
Gentleman Argentum
Veteran
Joined: 24 Aug 2019
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 973
Location: State of Euphoria
20 Jun 2020, 8:40 pm
Pepe wrote:
Gentleman Argentum wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
^^on that subject, let me relate my own story of misconstrued innocence- i complimented a patient on her artfully applied nail polish, whereupon she turned beet red and boiling mad and immediately called my supervisor to complain loudly. they read me the riot act and i told them they cut me to the quick, i had no intention of "harassing" anybody and that in the future i would not say a thing even if their hands were on fire. they did not appreciate that last bit.
It must have been the wording, something was misinterpreted.
I have, thank God, avoided altercations with women-or-men over any perceived sexual interest, at work.
In all cases, I assume the other person is NOT interested.
If I begin to suspect someone is getting uncomfortable (usually woman) then I back off and try to stay away from them. With distance, comes safety. They forget or forgive or both.
However, had a woman at church, or rather her boyfriend, get upset with me. I had not said or done anything inappropriate. She performed a magic ritual. The next Sunday he got really hostile with me, he was clearly jealous.
I think it was the tone of voice I used when I thanked her for the ritual she performed. Too friendly? I do not know. Maybe something in my eyes? Sometimes I think we may come across as too friendly, too genuine, too whatever. Do you think so?
I abandoned the church and never went back. They were there first, after all. Their church, not mine.
NTs often/usually have trouble with openness and honesty.
Give them a miss, if you can.
Erm,
Is your wife one?
I don't know how you can miss NT's, they are the majority after all. Giving them a miss would mean not doing anything at all. I just take my chances.
I do not have a wife.
20 Jun 2020, 10:52 pm
Gentleman Argentum wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Gentleman Argentum wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
^^on that subject, let me relate my own story of misconstrued innocence- i complimented a patient on her artfully applied nail polish, whereupon she turned beet red and boiling mad and immediately called my supervisor to complain loudly. they read me the riot act and i told them they cut me to the quick, i had no intention of "harassing" anybody and that in the future i would not say a thing even if their hands were on fire. they did not appreciate that last bit.
It must have been the wording, something was misinterpreted.
I have, thank God, avoided altercations with women-or-men over any perceived sexual interest, at work.
In all cases, I assume the other person is NOT interested.
If I begin to suspect someone is getting uncomfortable (usually woman) then I back off and try to stay away from them. With distance, comes safety. They forget or forgive or both.
However, had a woman at church, or rather her boyfriend, get upset with me. I had not said or done anything inappropriate. She performed a magic ritual. The next Sunday he got really hostile with me, he was clearly jealous.
I think it was the tone of voice I used when I thanked her for the ritual she performed. Too friendly? I do not know. Maybe something in my eyes? Sometimes I think we may come across as too friendly, too genuine, too whatever. Do you think so?
I abandoned the church and never went back. They were there first, after all. Their church, not mine.
NTs often/usually have trouble with openness and honesty.
Give them a miss, if you can.
Erm,
Is your wife one?
I don't know how you can miss NT's, they are the majority after all. Giving them a miss would mean not doing anything at all. I just take my chances.
I do not have a wife.
I'm retired and am a homebody.
When I go walking I literally walk in the opposite direction when I see people coming my way.
And not because of the Covid virus.
I am just sick of the attitude and related nonsense.
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,574
Location: the island of defective toy santas
21 Jun 2020, 4:28 am
Gentleman Argentum wrote:
People jump to conclusions and go from 0 to 60 in a split second. Zero allowance is made for Asperger's. Probably at some level, people you work with get that you're different and cut you a little slack. A patient just coming in won't. Intentions don't matter, NT's draw conclusions based on their arcane formulas which have a limited accuracy rating. I try to be silent as the grave around folks I don't know, but the NT's are wired to engage others in conversation. So it is a challenge. Best to never talk about another person's personal appearance. I usually reckon that is off-limits, even compliments, they can be taken the wrong way really easily.
you are prolly far smarter/cagier than i am, i wear who i am on my sleeves, long ago quit trying to camouflage as human. i can so easily be tricked/distracted out of my stone-faced silence. then the trouble begins. NTs seem to see right through me no matter what i do.
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