Guys or Gals: would you date a BBW?

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I'm talking biological testosterone driven need for a woman. What you're talking about is what comes after that need' is satisfied, the uneasy emotional intimacy backlash. It's a well known fact that men have higher drives. Though its debatable that woman's drives are culturally modulated. But thats a whole another discussion.

What about what I said before about how BBW are better and more passionate in bed, perhaps even with more experience as well, compared to thin women? Why do men seem to go for looks over sexual performance? Is it a false that they do and that perhaps it's the media that is making a woman's looks more important than sexual performance?

This is never talked about in the dating world. Sure you have guys like me posting it on here, but no one ever goes public with this media wise when talking about dating politics. Also, when it comes to the 'fat acceptance movement', if people publically new that BBW women often had better bedroom performance, wouldn't that help the acceptance movement?

Individuals never need sex for their own survival.  A species, yes; but never an individual.

I’ve had some nice times with some pretty hefty women in bed—that’s for sure.

I also had great lovin’ from a very attractive, normal-weight young woman.

Define “BBW”. Define “fat”.

Are we talking somewhat overweight here?
Then yes, I wouldn’t mind at all.

Are we talking clinically to morbidly obese here?
Then I am inclined to say no, probably not, I wouldn’t date a morbidly obese woman or man for that matter.
a)I don’t find it aesthetic at all. Quite the contrary to be honest…
b)I worry about health a lot in general and I would definitely constantly worry about my partner’s health and them slowly eating themselves into an early grave.
c)I like being active and in nature. While sports tend to bore me, I love hiking, I like to see historic sights, I like road trips, travelling, medieval markets, concerts, I just like to be out and about and I want to be active together with my partner and not waste away at home in front of the TV and that would not be possible with a morbidly obese partner, they couldn’t walk for 6- 8 hours none-stop while hiking. I have been to the mall and a winter market together with a morbidly obese acquaintance once and we had to walk incredibly slowly and she had to stop and sit down multiple times in 2 hours and couldn’t walk anymore at all at one point so we had to leave earlier.

But…

…. the thing is that I don’t really get attracted to someone based off on their looks. I see whether someone is aesthetic or looks attractive to me or not but that alone doesn’t get me interested in the person, doesn’t attract me to them. I go for intellect, humour, personality and compatibility, that actually makes a man/woman attractive to me and wanting to be with them.

So there always is that possibility that remains that a severely obese person just completely stuns me with their intelligence, their witty humour and their character and there is that strong connection there and in this case I probably wouldn’t be like:”But you’re too fat though piss off.” I would probably try a relationship anyway in this scenario but I would definitely encourage them to get healthier though.

What I always wondered whenever I read that this body type was considered beautiful and desirable to have for a woman and heard of North American women getting implants in their arses and hips to look like that was whether this is some specific US-American cultural thing or an Anglocentric cultural thing to find this appealing?

To me, as a continental European man, this honestly just looks insanely disproportionate and off and I find it very unaesthetic and unattractive look wise.

And I am not even alone with this perception at all although I often don’t align with the common views on beauty.
The more, well, less considerate usually NT men and NT women in my country outright make comments like “She has an arse like a horse!” or “What a poor woman, she’s 80% arse.” or “If she sits on a chair with that arse it bursts.” or they just call it ugly or if they are women, they call themselves lucky to not have such a disproportionate figure and feel sorry for that woman. This is definitely not considered beautiful or attractive in our culture at all, it’s the opposite. It’s considered very unattractive and people even ridicule it (which I don't think is okay to do even though I find it looks disproportunate).

People who are extremely overweight do tend to have a much harder time engaging in sexual activities. Think of the people on the show My 600 Pound Life but they are extremely overweight. It may be that the extreme cases are hurting the rep of the more moderate 1s.

I had a 300 pound girlfriend who had no trouble being sexual.

She knew how not to crush me when she was on top

All was very satisfactory, indeed

Think about this credo: “When there’s a will, there’s a way.”

What country are you from, if you don’t mind me asking? One of the reasons I’m terrified of how my body will look when I reach my goal size of a US 8/10 is that my body won’t be conventionally attractive/womanly here in America if I end up with no chest or butt. Maybe I should move.

Oh well how heavy are we talking here, when we say BBW? I was thinking more like 200-250 pounds rather than 600 pounds.

That goes to show you that what is considered attractive and unattractive is based on individuals tastes, and perhaps somewhat on culture as well. In other words, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I know some guys are who into tall skinny girls; that's their type. Other guys are into shorter and thicker girls; they're into girls with bigger hips and a bigger butt.

So the point is that it doesn't matter if you're tall, short, skinny, thick, blonde, brunette, big butt, small butt, big boobs, small boobs, etc... chances are there are guys out there who find your type attractive.


Me personally, I prefer girls who are 5 ft 3 or shorter. All the girls iv'e gone on dates with have been shorter than average, but that's also because I am a super short guy so I prefer to go after girls who are my height or shorter.

Wow, this made me feel better. Right now I only get attention from guys who I’m not attracted to. I’m working on becoming more goth/punk because I love metal and goth music despite not being into the aesthetic 100% other than band tees. Alternative guys are attractive in my opinion because I can look at them and tell they like my tastes in music.

I hate when guys act like I’m only focused on my appearance. I care about my appearance but it doesn’t take over my life.

Anyway, you gave me hope that someone will find me attractive when I weigh 140 to 150 pounds.

I would probably date a woman with extra weight as long as she is not morbidly obese and her weight isn’t affecting her health.

This is coming from someone who’s overweight, but gained all of the extra pounds from stress and medication alone.

I am from a Germanic nation and culture, I can at least tell you that much

Don’t worry about it. You don’t have to have an arse like that to have a womanly figure. Most women here don’t look like that to begin with (it’s a very extreme, rare and odd torso to arse ratio in these pictures to start with) and as I said they absolutely don’t want to look like that either.
And I am sure that there are men and/or women in the US who find this unattractive and disproportunate too and are attracted to women who aren't "80% arse", even if they end up being immigrants from Europe Don't let anyone tell you that you need to look like that to be attractive, you certainly don't have to.

These are a few women considered conventionally attractive here by the way:








As you can see, none of them got that disproportionate figure with the giant arse and thighs, nor do they have F Cup boobs or whatever and yet they are feminine and womanly.



Off topic but: You’ve got great taste in music



Yes. Agreed. Beauty is not measurable, not objective and thus it is actually not exactly possible to standardise it and if one asked me personally we shouldn't try to.
It’s too subjective in the end and yet cultural and societal ideals do exist and they differ from place to place and also from era to era and they do influence the broader view of the general public.

After careful deliberation, I'd be OK with it if they checked off one of these 4 Fs that offset it:

Fit (it's possible to be both)
Famous
Fashionable
Funny



Otherwise not really. Unfortunately in my experience most men on the spectrum are in a "beggars can't be choosers" situation, which is frustrating since getting to hug women like this makes others seem boring by comparison

Last edited by SportsGamer35728 on 08 Nov 2021, 8:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

All those woman actually look pretty hot!