How to avoid Dating a Narcissist

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Have you ever dated a Narcissist as an Aspie?
Poll ended at 29 Aug 2022, 3:16 pm
Yes 33%  33%  [ 5 ]
No 47%  47%  [ 7 ]
Possibly 20%  20%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 15

knowingtheautist
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05 Sep 2023, 4:24 pm

Some people are unsuspecting, not realizing that their partner is a narcissist. Aspies fail to discover the subtle signs in some people with NPD.

If you have ever been in SHOCK that your partner has suddenly left you or you caught them with another partner, share your stories....


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TwilightPrincess
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05 Sep 2023, 4:29 pm

I used to wish that I’d catch my husband with another woman.



IsabellaLinton
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06 Sep 2023, 6:16 pm

I caught my partners with other men.
I can't say I was shocked, but I wish they'd just told me their interest from the start.


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knowingtheautist
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10 Sep 2023, 1:22 pm

Did you know that 50% of the population suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder but 90% are talented at convincing their partner that they are a good partner.

Some aspies are manipulated even more easily.

A lot of you have mentioned that their partner was good at the beginning but not later.

Beware that certain people attract narcs more easily than others due to their empath traits. Remember, opposites attract. Empaths attract narcissists


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TwilightPrincess
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10 Sep 2023, 1:23 pm

knowingtheautist wrote:
Did you know that 50% of the population suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder but 90% are talented at convincing their partner that they are a good partner.

Where did you get those statistics from?



blitzkrieg
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10 Sep 2023, 1:24 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
knowingtheautist wrote:
Did you know that 50% of the population suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder but 90% are talented at convincing their partner that they are a good partner.

Where did you get those statistics from?


I was thinking the same thing.

These statistics seem bunk.



funeralxempire
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10 Sep 2023, 1:26 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
knowingtheautist wrote:
Did you know that 50% of the population suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder but 90% are talented at convincing their partner that they are a good partner.

Where did you get those statistics from?


Source: Trust me bro.


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10 Sep 2023, 1:27 pm

:lol:



funeralxempire
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10 Sep 2023, 1:42 pm

I'm always skeptical of people who claim wide swaths of the population are narcissists, it always seems more like an admission of being unable to get along with others than a verifiable fact supported by real-world evidence.

Beyond that, when someone seeks to attribute any sort of undesirable behaviour in others to narcissism instead of considering that they may have understandable (if not justifiable) motives that go beyond just serving their ego, it tends to scream this person refuses to consider others perspectives before making judgments about their motives which, if I'm not mistaken, is the sort of behaviour and attitude one would associate with narcissistic ways of thinking.


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10 Sep 2023, 1:52 pm

Good point.

Most of the time relationships don’t work because of incompatibility, not because someone has narcissism.

Quote:
Experts aren’t sure how common NPD is. According to research data, between 0.5% and 5% of people in the U.S. may have it.

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/d ... y-disorder



IsabellaLinton
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10 Sep 2023, 2:31 pm

There's a difference between someone being a Narcissist and having clinical NPD.

I suppose most can be part-time Narcissists too (lol) - like doing something narcissistic.

Clinical NPD like my exh is the one that's very rare.


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TwilightPrincess
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10 Sep 2023, 2:34 pm

The OP was referring to NPD in this made-up statistic:

Quote:
Did you know that 50% of the population suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder but 90% are talented at convincing their partner that they are a good partner.



Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 10 Sep 2023, 2:37 pm, edited 2 times in total.

IsabellaLinton
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10 Sep 2023, 2:35 pm

Oh good. I hadn't looked at the OP for quite a while. Thanks.


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10 Sep 2023, 4:02 pm

"Epidemiology

As of 2018, overall prevalence is estimated to range from 0.8% to 6.2%.[68][69] In 2008 under the DSM-IV, lifetime prevalence of NPD was estimated to be 6.2%, with 7.7% for men and 4.8% for women,[70] with a 2015 study confirming the gender difference.[71] In clinical settings, prevalence estimates range from 1% to 15%.[7][72] The occurrence of narcissistic personality disorder presents a high rate of comorbidity with other mental disorders.[25]"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder



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17 Sep 2023, 3:47 pm

The best thing you can do is learn how to spot them

-They love to talk about themselves
-They are usually pretty eager to get to know you ASAP
-They are nosy
-They play the victim
-They make unrealistic plans with you about getting married in a month
-They seem to talk about how they are the hero doing xyz



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21 Sep 2023, 7:20 am

Where_am_I wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Where_am_I wrote:
^ Excellent advice. They'll reveal their nasty side pretty soon after that, so be prepared to run!


Not always even that, sometimes they can be adequate as work friends or other arms-length relationships. Ideally they should never read you as suitable for fulfilling what they're after (ego-wise) so that you're never useful enough for them to see as worth trying to use.

Part of how people like that operate is they make emotional transactions always serve their interests so maintaining boundaries to ensure that can't happen tends to keep them from feeding on you, so to speak.


The traits these people have make it difficult for me to tolerate them (even at arms length), and I manage to easily offend them with my bluntness. I repel them as much as they repel me. It all works out for the best!


:lol: Most narcs want nothing to do with me because they find out that I am not going to let them control me. They also learn that I am not going to let them get away with being condescending.