Conflicting Interests in Relationships

Page 7 of 8 [ 115 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 4, 5, 6, 7, 8  Next


To Liberal atheist/agnostic/pagan Aspies: Would you date a neo-conservative Christian Aspie?
Yes 27%  27%  [ 13 ]
No 73%  73%  [ 36 ]
Total votes : 49

makuranososhi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,805
Location: Banned by Alex

30 May 2009, 12:25 pm

Absolutely. There are things that have occurred in my past relationships that I know would -not- be acceptable in the course of their religious concept of marriage. It is about the person, not the window dressing as it were.


M.


_________________
My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!


Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,096
Location: Houston, Texas

30 May 2009, 12:27 pm

My issue is that everybody I come across appears to be either left-wing or right-wing politically.

If I am even a moderate conservative, the left-wing radicals will think I am racist and homophobic. If I am even a moderate liberal, the right-wing fundies will think I am evil and condemn me to hell.

It's like moderate people do not exist.



makuranososhi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,805
Location: Banned by Alex

30 May 2009, 12:54 pm

Most will be one, the other, or a little of both - what does their political affiliation have to do with their personality, though? Such reduction doesn't achieve results, only misconception, in my opinion. I've met liberals I can't stand and conservatives I admire... it just isn't truly relevant.


M.


_________________
My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!


Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,096
Location: Houston, Texas

30 May 2009, 12:55 pm

It's not their personality. It's that they generalize about certain political beliefs based on extremist groups from either side.



makuranososhi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,805
Location: Banned by Alex

30 May 2009, 1:03 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:
It's not their personality. It's that they generalize about certain political beliefs based on extremist groups from either side.


Just as you are? Not trying to be rude, but it is a surprising double standard.


M.


_________________
My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!


Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,096
Location: Houston, Texas

30 May 2009, 1:46 pm

Just because I don't support abortion, same-sex marriage, or drive a Prius doesn't make me a right-wing fundamentalist.



CanyonWind
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,656
Location: West of the Great Divide

30 May 2009, 1:47 pm

I don't find it surprising that people who like South Park, The Simpsons, and Indie/Foreign films would be more likely to talk about sex and less concerned about saying something that might be considered bizarre or offensive.

Sex is a topic where what people talk about and what people actually do aren't necessarily the same thing.

Tim, I think maybe you should devote more effort to recruiting potential candidates and less effort to finding reasons to eliminate them.


_________________
They murdered boys in Mississippi. They shot Medgar in the back.
Did you say that wasn't proper? Did you march out on the track?
You were quiet, just like mice. And now you say that we're not nice.
Well thank you buddy for your advice...
-Malvina


Tias
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Dec 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 723
Location: Denmark

30 May 2009, 2:14 pm

I'm an atheist, whont ever believe in a god, but that wouldn't prevent me from wanting a relationship with a girl if she was christian or not, hell, wouldn't care if the person saw themselfs as a satanist. Just as long as the religion dosnt have a influence in your relationship, it is ok. As in, one of them trying to convert the other all the time and forcing things upon each other.



makuranososhi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,805
Location: Banned by Alex

31 May 2009, 11:09 am

Tim_Tex wrote:
Just because I don't support abortion, same-sex marriage, or drive a Prius doesn't make me a right-wing fundamentalist.


Those are the exact sort of generalizations that you are accusing others of making; gross assessments of people, lumping them into categories based on extraneous and rather irrelevant bits of data. That these things -might- trend together does not make them interrelated. I'm trying to point out an error in what I see, that's all.


M.


_________________
My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!


Fudo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2009
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,696

31 May 2009, 12:01 pm

hey sorry for the random post, i tried to PM makuransoshi but WP died :?
just wanted acknowledge the wise words here and elsewhere.. hello :oops:
erm anyways sorry for hijacking the thread briefly. & good luck Tim Tex



CanyonWind
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,656
Location: West of the Great Divide

31 May 2009, 1:40 pm

One thing Tim's absolutely right about is the correlation of religious beliefs, but only if there's kids involved and both adults care about their beliefs.

When you got parents with different belief systems, it makes Hiroshima look like a summertime sing around the campfire, and the heterosexual aspie male ain't gonna win or even tie.

Of course, that only matters if there's kids involved, and kids only get involved when the relationship progresses to... well, you know where kids come from.


_________________
They murdered boys in Mississippi. They shot Medgar in the back.
Did you say that wasn't proper? Did you march out on the track?
You were quiet, just like mice. And now you say that we're not nice.
Well thank you buddy for your advice...
-Malvina


Chyndonax
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 24 May 2009
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 130

01 Jun 2009, 1:43 am

Yes, but not one who was in your face with their beliefs. And we would have to have other things in common.


_________________
Whatever plot these fiends lay against us we will go on. This insolence of theirs is nothing new --Dante


Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,096
Location: Houston, Texas

05 Jun 2009, 5:50 pm

As for personality and being goal-oriented, I have been working on that.

As for geographical location, I have no issues with long-distance relationships (especially as nobody in the San Antonio-Austin metro area has the qualities I am looking for).

Yet, my good qualities still get me nowhere. If I come across someone interesting, I always make the first move. Still nothing.



MishLuvsHer2Boys
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Oct 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,491
Location: Canada

05 Jun 2009, 7:54 pm

As long as the two people involved get along, communicate well, share some interests, I don't put much focus on labelling oneself religiously or politically.



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,096
Location: Houston, Texas

11 Jun 2009, 9:28 am

That's how I feel.

It's the other person that does the labeling.

Also, the vast majority of people who have the same interests as me tend to be the "artsy hipster"-type, a term that does not describe me at all. Add to that that whoever I date must also be an Aspie, and it gets even more difficult.

I would be shunned by them because:

1. I am a Christian
2. I vote Republican, and occasionally lean toward libertarianism
3. I drive a Ford Focus, and plan to own an SUV in the future
4. I am not an artist or a musician
5. I don't drink fancy, European beers
6. I plan to be working in a field where I probably will be wearing a suit and tie to work
7. I don't live in a loft that used to be a warehouse or a factory

Also, I don't feel that I can wait until marriage for sex, and that's a major issue with me, especially when I said that I wanted someone who is a Christian. So I am at odds with both liberals, and fellow conservatives. I am between a rock and a hard place.



BazzaMcKenzie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Aug 2006
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,495
Location: the Antipodes

11 Jun 2009, 11:19 pm

I wonder if some of your problem is that you live in an University town? I have never been to America, but I can't help thinking that outside a student enclave, you will not find too many people that drink Becks or Heineken or are artists or musicians or live in lofts etc.

I hope when you graduate and get into the "real world" things are much easier.


_________________
I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in.
Strewth!