life without female partner

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is being a austin lead one to live life without female partner being we are afraid to go near to women and make relation and even if relaion is made it is very difficuilt to mentain it .Please reply soon I am eager to know my object to not to hurt anyone but know the right answer .

Well I, for one, have a female partner, as do many men with Asperger's. Sure, it's harder for us in some ways, but it can be done. I can't tell you how to do it, since everyone is different. But it can be done.

I had one but she accused me for having an affair with a woman who would not been seen dead in a relationship with a man who has Asperger syndrome. This woman went off with a neurotpyical. My experiences in this are not with intelligent women that I can have an intelligent conversation with and anyway they only live with their parents who only see me as the biggest shithouse ever. I know many men with Asperger syndrome have a partner. If not then they would not be interested. That is my experience with women not very good isn't it.

You can be autistic and have a partner. It may not happen soon, but it can happen.

The way to do that is to become more social. By that I mean put yourself out in public and interact with others. Go to school, coffee houses, the mall, bookstores, the library... There are people that may notice you and start a conversation. A conversation may start spontainiously. That may lead to a relationship-or not.

Try to become more comfortable around people, and interact with them. It isn't easy, but the more you practice, the more you'll become comfortable, and confident.

It took me about 20 years to accomplish this task-more or less- but eventually I did find someone with whom to spend the rest of my life.

Your paticence will be rewarded.

I'm a female but can definitely relate. I don't know if there is one ultimate right answere.

For me, it isn't easy initiating a conversation let alone going out. The last time I was dating a guy, I felt very uncomfortable and insecure. I think one of my problems was I focused too much on myself and not on the guy. But even that's hard since I'm verbally clumsy with emotions coming off flat....typical with aspergers. I remember not laughing at his jokes because I just couldn't and not expressing myself in the same ways most people do when they're with someone.

I've gotten to the point where I guess I'm becoming avoidant. It has never been easy for me to read people. Sometimes I've made the mistake of reading too much into people. I also do not deal well with clingy people. By that I mean having my personal space occupied ALL the time and having to constantly talk to them on the phone. I've had people mistaken these actions of my wanting to have time to myself...as my own way of splitting or showing little interest. Funny how guys think.

Anyway the only feedback I can give is that your effort to get with any females is going to require you to step a little out of your comfort zone. Not easy and at least you're aware of your difficulties in maintaing relationships. Some people think that a relationship is suppose to last forever but I think it's about exploring the people you're with. Finding out who you feel you can connect to on an open basis and letting them know your boundaries. There's nothing wrong or selfish with making boundaries about what you feel you're unable to handle from that person.

Just my two cents.

MissConstrue65
please can you clarify more what you have answered

missC is right, girls won't come to you just because you're an honest and noble guy*, you have to make an effort.


*a friend actually thinks that

what effort a person can make who is suffering from fear of rejections

Answer is simple: stop taking rejections so seriously. It is not the end of the world if a girl wont go out with you. Eventually, you will be able to ask girls out and if they do not want to, you'll sigh and say "She was uninterested in me, so what?" to yourself.

I know, it is easy to write, but i have been there and it IS 100% possible for you to get out of that state of thought, but it is a journey you must take on your own.

"girls won't come to you just because you're an honest and noble guy*"

Nah, you need a lot of money. Then, they're interested.

Bah to relationships.