Are you introverted?

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Are there any other guys here around my age group (18-early 20's) who consider themselves to be introverted?

How would you say that affects chances of getting in a relationship?

I Consider Myself Introverted.

It Basically Destroys My Chances of Being in a Relationship Even Though I Would Like To Be In One.

Introverted, of course.

But why can't a person logically determine the advantageous action regardless of in/extroversion?



Oh, and DarkAngel, your sentences look like titles.

It's not a matter of not being able to determine what's advantageous, it's about having the desire and energy to do it. Before I knew about Asperger's, I considered myself an extreme introvert. I wanted to be in a relationship but absolutely hate making small talk and conversing about "nothing". No matter how advantageous it will be to do so, I can't bring myself to do that sort of thing.

I am extremely introverted 20 years old. I would think that it affects my chances but I don't think it's a major reason why I never had a relationship. It would probably be more of a reason why a relationship fails than starts.

It's something about myself that I decided to change.
Of course I would want to pursue an advantageous action, so the desire is there. And the best way that I've found to have a conversation about nothing is to subtly change it into a conversation about something.

I’m not a guy, but I’m at least in the right age range and consider myself an introvert.

Anyway, I think being an introvert makes it that much harder for the rest of the population to understand you. After all, we are the minority in comparison to extroverts and extroverts have trouble understanding why anyone would want to be by themselves especially since modern society encourages people to be more extroverted.

But as far as affecting chances go, I think introverted guys have it better. A lot of introverted guys get labeled the “strong silent type” and who doesn’t like them? The girls get stuck considered “timid” or “haughty” and there is really no positive way to view either word.

Introverts and extroverts can manage to live together though. My roommate is a social butterfly and I’m…not. I respect her need to think out loud by listening whenever she wants to talk and she respects my need for alone time by going off and hanging out with other extroverts. I think that as long as you respect the other person there is no reason why being an introvert or an extrovert should hurt a relationship.

It comes down to the end results justifying the means. I haven't been able to convince myself that that's the case. How do you start an interesting conversation with a woman you know absolutely nothing about? You just don't walk up to some random woman and ask if she thinks Ken Griffey Jr. should play for the Mariners again next year.

Not really... guys are expected to make the first move in most cultures, and an introverted guy is very unlikely to make such a first move... introverted girls can just wait until a guy asks them out...


Well of course, the only thing you need in a relationship is communication... if you have that (and actually have it as opposed to thinking you have it), you can make almost anything work...

Topics are the tricky bit. My general strategy is to start with smalltalk and get out of it as quickly and smoothly as possible.

I was speaking about how they're viewed by society, which affects the way individuals perceive them, which affects their chances of getting into a relationship.

But if you really want to go simply the asking out problem route: they're less likely to be asked out because they're considered to be timid or haughty. Would you want to ask out a girl who appeared to be afraid of you? Or appeared to think she was better than you? Would you agree to a date with her if she asked?

The stigma goes both ways, really. And since plenty of other topics have already discussed why girls don't usually ask guys out, being an introverted girl makes that even harder as well.