I think love is elusive because society is broken

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I don't think you can separate the two. Where are you most likely to find love? In my opinion, probably Italy, Greece, Ireland, Portugal or Spain. All these countries have a society that is not yet broken by too many split families and too much individualism.

Countries like Germany, Great Britain, Sweden, USA, Australia and the Netherlands have had the traditional family unit severely hammered by modern lifestyles, aided by welfare states and economic growth.

People don't need love as much in the second category of countries and so love is dying in them. A person who has their own apartment and lives a separate life from their family and is very self-sufficient can end up forgetting how to relate to people. Welcome to the crisis of love.

pardon me while I laugh out loud, because society didn't develop love. The attraction between people that are attracted to each other is not governed by society, no matter how much many many religions and cultures have tried. . .
They don't call it 'the wild thing' for nothing, you know.

We may act different socially, but we'll always have the same hormones whether you're a big fat horny american or some mr. Romancio in Italy.
P.S. I do see what you mean though.

As somebody who comes from a totally dysfunctional, violent family that stayed together because of a society that trapped us as a family unit, let me say that it's probably better than a foster home, but not by a whole lot. And we looked great, too. Such an affectionate, caring family, looking after each other. What a lovely front we presented to the neighbours. What a pack of lies.

romantic love is a modern invention anyway, historically, people married to please their parents and for mutual gain rather than for love. love is often an illusion anyway, sometimes a shared one. spiritually the perfect love is the love from god, not people, so from that point of view who needs romantic lerv?

But people are shaped by their cultures. Nature vs Nurture.

not vs nurture, nature AND nurture. They haven't developed a cure for limerence, though.

Culture just dictates how people posit their feelings, it can maybe attempt to manipulate them with misinformation but subconscious of the average person is a bit too strong, fundamentally won't by what the conscious mind is shoveling at it, and that generally causes more than enough dissonance and seemingly irrational behavior.

That said though I won't lie, romantic love is a rather recent invention but at the same time I don't think we've lacked the desire for it any at levels but rather most of us are just too clumsy with other people (NT's included), knowledge of self, and as unique as almost all people are its extremely difficult to find a head-on match, always has been and likely will be for some time. The stale and banal social attitudes that natural selection brings about also greatly impede this which, may make it look like societies that denounce that have a better track record - it does go both ways though as someone had mentioned earlier (coercion to put on a front in a bad marriage) but part of it is knowing how to balance and deal with base nature - our society does need a lot more of that knowledge and discipline, we're on a completely new paradigm as infant mortality and the need of reproduction is so low, likely things are just up in the air at this point and people will figure out how to resolve the problem of the new family structure; they'll need to because its not going away.

it think that as far as the typical AS is concerned we better search for our true love in the "broken societies"

Well it's true... technology has driven people apart (cellphones, facebook, computers, etc)... longer work hours, smaller paychecks mean everyone must work all the time, the culture of instant gratification, the demise of civil society... it's so easy to go through the week without having to interact with anyone outside of work... we don't know our neighbors, we are scared to talk to strangers... whole books have been written about these trends. And the sum of these things is, yes, it is harder for people to build relationships than it used to be.

Is still alive and well, I can personally attest to the two times in life I have fallen deeply and madly in love, the trick is to learn to communicate via alternate means such as the written word via poetry even if it is borrowed from other sources. It's the sentiment that matters I am personally very poor at verbal communication, getting tongue tied a lot. If you wish to find someone try a dating website and then talk via email etc before you meet.
There is always someone for everyone you just need to look, although the trick is to keep things alive after the initial passion has cooled a bit and that is the hardest bit of all. Try and force yourself to come out of your comfort zone and force yourself to tackle your worst fears and go for it. It does work my present wife accepts me for who I am and I accept her for who she is and she is not on the spectrum but has her own issues such as CAPD.
Love can be found just keep looking.

Note that we are products of evolution. Evolution doesn't care about the individual. It is instead the name of the method nature uses to create better suited lifeforms. Love is nature's tool to attract individuals toward each other so they would want to reproduce and even fight over the individual you should reproduce with. Because, after all, evolution is all about fighting for the right to live. Human society has given the concept various undeserving attributes simply because we haven't understood it and because we're able to discuss it. Love isn't going away any time soon.

Society does effect the evolution of the human spacies and so does the environment; just as it does for other animal species. Woman don't need the nurturing providing father for their children to survive to adult hood, so this leads to more single parent famalies and woman who are considerably more picky choosing the most alpha male types.

Monogamous relationship (one man one woman) was created as a means for survival in a harsh environment, in modern time it is no longer required.

our survival will always depend on Monogamous relationship
and even more so as time passes and we develop as a race
it's true that in the past the reason to stay together were influenced by the more basic needs which we tale for granted now days
but that doesn't mean that momogamy as a sentiment and instinct lost all it's appeal or relevance to our life
on the contrary
modern enviromnt
the one that every one hate
provides us with an infrastructure that supports much better and much more adaptive and creative types of monogamy
it's the same collapsing of the old values that every one is bitching about(cellphones,the net,no human contacts...)
that creates channels to real monogamy
a deep and true relation with another person
and we need it
most human needs it badly
it's essential to our health,creativity,sensitivities and all the things that makes us a person

my theory is that many of our idiosyncrasies and our unsynced stat with society at large is also connected some how to the fact that AS are monogamous by nature
i can really see and hear it in the AS collective or statistical voice i observed on this forum and others like it
naturally it is also explain quit a bit about my personal experience

I'm not sure love is the right word, but I think I see what you're getting at. Replace love with good interpersonal relationships, romantic or not and you're right on the money. They are elusive.

To me if a couple breaks up, it's probably because it was never love. Those people chose each other maybe because of cultural pressures and ideas. A society can affect what is typical in relationships.

The dudes kiss each other in those societies though. I don't even like shaking another guy's hand.