Furious with girlfriend - or am I being stupid?

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Yesterday at work, I got an email from my partner, who really hoped I would agree to go to Starbucks after work, because she had something she wanted to talk to me about.
Immediately I went into panic mode, thinking someone was ill, I was in some kind of trouble, there was bad news etc etc. My mind was racing and she knows me well enough to know that was inevitable. All the same, she reassured me it was nothing to worry about, but she wouldn't even give me a clue over what was going on.
Several hours later, we went for a coffee, but they had suddenly withdrawn my favourite mocha and I didn't fancy anything else.
She went mad at me saying she wasn't going to be sitting there FOR AN HOUR without me having a drink.
Hmph, that's my problem surely, and AN HOUR?? What on earth was happening? What could take an hour!?
We sat down, right next to an NT knitting circle, so I went a little quiet.
Eventually I just blurted out that I wanted to know what she had to say and please hurry up and tell me.
She refused. On the grounds that she didn't feel like it anymore. I protested about game playing, messing with my head, all calmly and quietly, due to the NT knitting circle.
She raised her voice and asked me what my problem was!
Well, it was clearly her, I replied and very nearly left. After that, we browsed in a couple of shops and went for a burger, but I dropped her off at home straight after, not in the mood for more head games.

Please can I have some perspectives on this?
I am seriously considering ending the 2 year relationship over this. If she will play with my mind and have such disregard for any anxiety it causes me, she clearly isn't right for me. She is NT, by the way, but with quite a few Aspie traits.
The original issue has now become secondary to being left deliberately in the dark, and the effect it has on me.
Am I being out of order?

I would also be very irritated if someone wouldn't tell me what they wanted to tell me and they leave me guessing trying to figure out what it is.

That kind of thing would enrage me but that is only part of a larger relationship so I don't know. Have you talked to her when you're both calm about how you feel? Sounds like she has some control issues maybe?

Thanks everyone for the replys so far. I do hope she isn't cheating, but we are meeting up in half an hour and I might find out, because I do intend to talk about it, but I am still so angry and icy and speechless that I wouldn't be able to broach it first.
(mental note to self - must practice mindfulness )
Perhaps we should try going for another coffee - anywhere but Starbucks...
I can't really tell if she is like this all the time, but being generally the passive sort, I suppose I do tend to go along with what she wants.

Have you ever explained how Aspie anxiety works, and the whole neurology behind it all? Have you explained that unless the anxiety is dealt with, it is very difficult to have a discussion? You can't really get very far in the relationship if she doesn't understand this.

My boss didn't understand this at first, and if one argued about whatever issue is at hand, he tried to argue on the logical level, and the more anxious I get, the worse my ability to follow what he is saying. He said recently that if I (or my ADHD colleague) feel anxious and want to do something a certain way to relieve the anxiety, we should to tell him that we are feeling anxious and it will be easier for him to understand that this is the motivation for the request than if we try to justify the action in some laborious logical way. Then he can act accordingly.

What she had to tell you was maybe a good news, a very good one.
Maybe something that didn't have anything to do with you or you two but still a very good news.
And she could be very excited about it (in a good way).
Something she knew would please you as well.
She wanted to do you a surprise.

And how did you react?
She assured you you had nothing to worry about.
But you still worried.
More and more until you met.

You did not trust her.
You lacked confidence in her, in her words.

And seing you in the mood you were - and I can imagine the face you were doing by the way you acted about... what?
A coffee, a single coffee that wasn't the one you wanted? Well yes, I can imagine how YOU cut it off ("it": the desire to talk to you anymore).

You're still angry today?
Fine.
How is SHE?

In an NT world, one would say that you're acting passive/agressive and that is a major love killer, trust me (if you don't trust her).

My gut reaction (for what it's worth) is that she knew exactly how asking to meet him and being cryptic about what she wanted to talk about would make him extremely anxious. As a matter of fact, wouldn't anybody react that way, but maybe with different levels of anxiety? I remember when I was a kid and the parents would call me down for a little talk I would always assume I was in big trouble.

Michjo, I would be anxious if my partner told me they had something to talk about, even if they told me not to worry about it. The last time I had a partner tell me that, what he really wanted to tell me was that he wanted to break up with me. Usually, "we need to talk" is codeword for "I'm breaking up with you."