What if a woman smiles, leans towards you, and asks...

Page 1 of 1 [ 11 posts ] 

NicksQuestions
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2009
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 218

14 Aug 2009, 3:52 am

I'm trying to figure out what to do in these situations. Although the opportunity is blown, if I learn from mistakes then I could be prepared for the future.

Earlier at work there was a woman who would always wave at me in a girly way. One time she was doing something and without any intentions of flirting I said, "You shouldn't do that. You could hurt your teeth."

She then smiled, leaned towards me and said, "So... why are you interested in my teeth?" Although she's hot, I didn't know what to do at the time, so I didn't do anything.

I wasn't trying to flirt when I said what I did, and I was being serious, but I strongly think she was flirting. What is the best thing to do in these situations? What type of things do you say back, in the moment, to what she said? (I was interested in her)



hale_bopp
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,054
Location: None

14 Aug 2009, 5:47 am

If I had any advice, I would tell you, but I tend to react in EXACTLY the same way as you.



studentM
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 485
Location: Wasatch Mountains

14 Aug 2009, 6:01 am

If you can find something genuinely complimentary to say about the person that's relevant to the moment, that's good, I think.

In this situation, maybe something like, 'You have a nice smile.'



idiocratik
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 784
Location: OR

14 Aug 2009, 6:04 am

I usually tense up when approached. I'll be single forever. haha


_________________
"Occultism is the science of life; the art of living." - H.P. Blavatsky


ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

14 Aug 2009, 9:33 am

idiocratik wrote:
I usually tense up when approached. I'll be single forever. haha


Welcome to the story of this forum...



Peko
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,381
Location: Eastern PA, USA

14 Aug 2009, 9:57 am

It depends if you are interested in her or not. I don't know what should do if you are (another thing is I cannot tell you how to tell if a woman or man is genuinely flirting or just being a jerk... or whatever you want to call it :oops: :( ). But if you don't like her you could of just said (in that situation) "No, I was just concerned you were going to hurt your teeth. That wouldn't be fun." You could throw in "but your teeth are nice" if you aren't sure if you are being rude & are actually concerned about being rude ( :roll: I don't bother myself, but throwing in a compliment may be risky cause she may take it as flirting). I suggest avoiding people like that if you do not like them & do not know their intentions. Sorry can't really help :(.


_________________
Balance is needed within the universe, can be demonstrated in most/all concepts/things. Black/White, Good/Evil, etc.
All dependent upon your own perspective in your own form of existence, so trust your own gut and live the way YOU want/need to.


MDD123
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,007

14 Aug 2009, 10:06 am

If her friends were around, I'd go with Peko's theory, she was just watching your reactions to get a rise out of you. If she was on her own, she may have been interested but not known now to get the ball rolling, it's possible that she saw some depth to you and didn't know how to approach. But it's also possible that she did it for her own sense of self. I know married women who flirt with other men just so they can feel attractive.

I think it boils down to how you feel. If she looks like she could use a pick-me-up, then complimenting her would be a very good idea. If you're tired of being treated like a doormat by someone who's using you to make them look good, you might want to tell her that one of her teeth looked cracked and that you thought she'd get mouthfreeze. Bottom line, speak for yourself or it'll happen again.



MissConstrue
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,052
Location: MO

14 Aug 2009, 10:11 am

I think the problem with most aspies is they take things too literally.

It looks like she was teasing you in a flirtatious way...then again I wasn't there. But many girls and even guys kind of tease eachother to get somewhat of a rise if they haven't already with their constant glances and physical as well as verbal cues....if you've already missed out on those.


_________________
I live as I choose or I will not live at all.
~Delores O’Riordan


ViperaAspis
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Apr 2009
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,083
Location: Portland, OR

14 Aug 2009, 11:03 am

LOL. Nice. Based on the past interactions, she's quite obviously batting at you like a cat with a ball of yarn, testing you as a "potential dating candidate". Assuming you have no qualms about workplace romance, don't let hotness be a barrier. Bat back and be witty! Choose from the following responses to "...why are you interested in my teeth":

1. "Tooth fetish. Looks like you qualify. Look, I've gotta get to <interesting activity>. You up for lunch this Saturday at <restaurant name>?" If she doesn't take the bait, move on and don't push.

2. "Well, I don't know if you realize this, but there have been a rash of vampire sightings in the news lately. That's the trouble with <town name>, all the damn vampires. (if she gets that movie reference or laughs, ask her out immediately with) <cheesy grin> If you need a protector, I'm free this Saturday. Why don't you meet me at <nice restaurant name>." If she doesn't laugh or just gives you an odd look, move on. Don't push.

3. "I'm a dental student. You know <pause> dentists make lots of money. You doing anything for lunch this Saturday?"

The main thing to remember is that you want to be funny and show a bit of healthy aggression. You don't want to be literal (no sense of humor) or pushy-stalker-like. You also don't want to be crude and deliver some lame response about BJs. Ugh.


_________________
Who am I? This guy! http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt97863.html


Janissy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 May 2009
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,450
Location: x

14 Aug 2009, 11:09 am

ViperaAspis wrote:
2. "Well, I don't know if you realize this, but there have been a rash of vampire sightings in the news lately. That's the trouble with <town name>, all the damn vampires. (if she gets that movie reference or laughs, ask her out immediately with) <cheesy grin> If you need a protector, I'm free this Saturday. Why don't you meet me at <nice restaurant name>." If she doesn't laugh or just gives you an odd look, move on. Don't push.

3.


I especially like this line. :D



MommyJones
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Dec 2008
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 684
Location: United States

14 Aug 2009, 11:17 am

Janissy wrote:
ViperaAspis wrote:
2. "Well, I don't know if you realize this, but there have been a rash of vampire sightings in the news lately. That's the trouble with <town name>, all the damn vampires. (if she gets that movie reference or laughs, ask her out immediately with) <cheesy grin> If you need a protector, I'm free this Saturday. Why don't you meet me at <nice restaurant name>." If she doesn't laugh or just gives you an odd look, move on. Don't push.

3.


I especially like this line. :D


Me too!

I'm a terrible flirt because I think it's just fun and friendly. She may be just flirtatious by nature and is having fun with you. The vampire line is great! :lmao: