example of a sucess with woman (can any1 explain?)

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When I was at college a year ago, I went out with some friends from my class, there was a friend who went with them who I had liked since I met her a week ago. (called stace) We started chatting, and I was just doing what I had read in "make friends and influence people", asking what she did, being pleasant. She had just been in the crowd at the Jerry Springer show so I asked her what it was like. Anyway, one of my other friends said they had been smoking pot, so I said to stace "you smoke it then" so she said "why"? and i said "you seem like the kind of person who smokes it", (which was true), and she started laughing and said "o my god why" and i said "well, you're very laid back, you're a lot of fun, you seem very open minded", (which was all true). And she kept laughing and punching my arm and following me around saying "why do i look like i smoke pot, tell me more". And i said "i can just see it in your eyes, you have the eyes of pot" (which wasnt true, i made it up) and she was laughing and saying "why tell me more" And then she was interested in me and asking me about myself all night. And my friends play this dumb game when theyre drunk where they read each others palms and say what it says, i did it to her and said " you have a strong line there, that means your tough" and she was laughing and saying "whats your palms say then" and doing it back. we ended up kissing and dated for a few weeks though it fizzled out as it was casual.

anyway i thought maybe i was a big sucess socially that time, i am always funny like that, but i dont often go out and meet new people and i usually just save it for my friends. It was only in college i started going out and meeting people, and only the last year i started trying to be funny with new people and everyone (like i am with friends) and not just shy. i wonder should my actions here be the norm now and something for all aspies to emulate.

anyway the reason i bring this up is cause SINCE then i read on a dating website "women love to be told about themselves". like a psychic would, tell them things they dont know about themselves (even if ur making it up!) they said they are suckers for it.

Sounds like you clicked with her -- she was into you and liking you. It isn't always about just what you do as much as meeting the right person at the right time. Normally, if you are interested too, you should follow up with someone like that -- she was touching you, heaping attention on you, etc. Get her number, call her, go out more, etc.

But i ALWAYS click with women when im "funny" , "mocking" "teasing them about themselves" .

and i hardly ever click when im just myself.

Join the club

All kidding aside, it does tend to be like that -- when you don't want something, it comes to you, and vice versa. What you need to figure out is why it happens that way. I used to notice that I got a lot of looks when I was drunk, but not so many when I was sober. I realized that I was probably either tensing my face or putting on an expression (even a subtle one) that make me look less handsome or trustworthy or happy. When I was under the influence, my face was relaxed -- even this one girl who ended up loathing me liked me better in that state.

So I'm not saying go out and get drunk -- what I am saying is watch your behavior, if you "want it too much" with girls you like, if you seem desperate or not enough of a challenge.

And also, with some people you just can't be yourself and have them like you -- So you have to ask yourself, is it really worth it? Be polite, but at some point, you have to be true to yourself.

Isn't being funny, or mocking or teasing them about themselves a part of being yourself?

sure, but it seems to come more natural to others. I only did it after noticing all my "girl popular" friends did it.

Okay, well for one thing.. That may have worked for that girl, but here are a few pointers on things that could have gone horridly wrong.

Firstly, I'm not sure if you do this all the time, but DON'T follow letter-by-letter strategic advice from a book on meeting people. It's good to pick up pointers if you're shy or awkward, but we DO pick up on things like a guy practising how to meet us. It's rather off-putting.

Secondly, it was a good idea to say "You seem like a [blank] type of person", but my advice is to never say "smoke pot" with that. Or drink heavily, or do any sort of drug, or anything that can be widely considered immoral. She may have found it funny, but me and many of my close female friends would be EXTREMELY offended if you told us we looked like someone who did pot, as we're against drugs. And there are a LOT of women out there like that.

Not trying to start any drug debates here, just saying - that sort of thing can REALLY offend a girl, so try to stick to something with a less popularly negative connotation.. like dancing or something.