Karen Krizanovitch ....writes..did my ex have Aspergers?

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jelibean
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24 Aug 2009, 5:22 pm

I really like this article published today. An American Journalist in the UK, how appropriate to have the 'international' flavour, I like the way she writes. Thought you all may be interested. I agree with all she says especially that Loving Mr Spock by Barbara Jacobs has to be my all time fav ...........give it a try those that don't know it! It is a 'relationship' with an aspie book and as an aspie I find it easy to read and a pleasure to pick up. Anyway here is the article....enjoy :D

Click here for full article
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... ntric.html


The movie Adam is a romantic comedy about a man diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome - a form of high-functioning autism. He is a bright, childlike and highly focused young man. However, he cannot understand emotions.
Adam takes words literally. He is socially awkward, easily disturbed and misunderstands figures of speech, intonation and body language. His behaviour is often inappropriate.
Newly divorced from someone who was emotionally detached, inflexible and successful, watching this film immediately rang bells

Afterwards, I was desperate to read more about Asperger's Syndrome and devoured a copy of Barbara Jacobs's book, Loving Mr Spock, (Penguin Books, £7.99).

It made me realise that I may indeed have been married to a man with Asperger's, someone who suffers a wide spectrum of autistic traits ranging from alluring to hurtful.
Jacobs's book was an eye-opener and not without caution: 'Many behaviours of the " typical bloke" have some similarities with Asperger's Syndrome,' she writes in her preface, 'and the condition can't be attributed to every oddball you may meet, of whatever gender.'
My marriage was great until I hit an all-time low with simultaneous work setbacks and a miscarriage. Naturally, I turned to my husband for emotional support. It was as if he didn't know what to do and couldn't be bothered to try.



Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... z0P8qHgNQ1



24 Aug 2009, 6:00 pm

I didn't think Adam was child like. What makes him child like? Is he child like because he is different?

I saw the movie this weekend and thought it was okay. He was a little stereotyped and a little exaggerated with the traits. But at least they gave him some normal skills such as shaking hands and introducing himself. At least they didn't make him a social ret*d or low functioning aspie. I thought his voice was a little monotone and he was socially awkward and he was a little inflexible. At least they didn't throw in savant syndrome. Mozart and the whale was different because it was based on two real people and only those two characters were savants. Anyway my husband thought this movie told a story about us except it was reversed because it was the man who had AS, not the woman and her name was also Beth. He also saw lot of me in Adam but thought he was more extreme than me and exaggerated. I know I would not ask "Did you feel sexual in the park?" and my husband told me that's what makes me better than him. I mean I thought it was a stupid question so why would I ask it and I thought it was exaggerated, did he think Beth had a park fetish? My husband laughed and explained to me he was sexually attracted to her so he was trying to ask her if she felt the same way. Now that made sense. He should have asked instead if she is sexually attracted to him.

Back to the article:

Good thing Karen found an explanation about her ex and the way he acted. Now if she knew about it in their marriage, they maybe would not have divorced and she would have found different ways and understood him better and not assume he was a jerk or he didn't care about her. This just shows why it's important for people to know of your AS in relationships.



Ruchard
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24 Aug 2009, 6:30 pm

I haven't seen the movie yet and i didn't like reading the article in the daily mail or the comments made by people on the site.



jelibean
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25 Aug 2009, 3:36 am

Yea completely agree with all you are all saying. Was not sooo struck on the film......why don't they get an ASPIE to play the part......my son would have made a better job BUT I do agree with all that is being said about 'Loving Mr Spock' although I have to correct Karen and say it is now published with Jessica Kingsley, BRILLIANT BOOK one I would HIGHLY recommend :D