Going against my own advice to give up

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I'm not cynical enough to give up yet... getting there though.

So theres a girl I like who I have spoken to in real life on a few various situations over the months and I got her number in person and all. She has a boyfriend, but she broke up with him a few days ago. I want to give it a few weeks and then call her (not use fb for once) and ask her to catch up and get coffeee.

Any advice?

asking her to catch up and get coffee sounds just right- she may be cautious if she just broke it off with the other guy and coffee is non threatening and a great opportunity to get to know each other.

literally just be like "hey we should get some coffee on [day, time]" at the end of a good conversation with her. coffee is practically foolproof it's such a neutral activity.

Well can you guys explain this to me, and this is going to sound really weird but maybe you guys have some experience with it.

I've asked girls I barely knew in person to hang out on facebook and they usually told me they were to busy, so Im afraid the same thing will happen. but maybe i'll have more luck sense i'm going to call on the phone, and I have some relationship with her in real life?

She might want to talk about her bad relationship, I remember addressing the emotions that this one girl brought up for me, she appreciated it. I mean it's a 1 sided approach, but definately useful for someone who just ended a relationship. She could also be in denial of any emotions about it, if she wants to be stoic about it, then you can act like the relationship wasn't worth a damn either.

Being AS, it's really hard to ask a girl out without revealing your intentions, and you can leave it to the NT to sell you short.

Ideally, I'd have something else to talk about first. Then tell her that you want to try a new coffee shop and that you want to get her opinion on it (use your own fuzzy logic here). Good luck man.

That's good that you decided not to give up.

Dustin, you're too young to give up. I felt the same way at your age because I'd been completely denied any emotional or physical contact with males throughout my formative years, and I was suicidal because of it. Thankfully, I listened to my mom (who was my best friend on this planet), and waited. Eventually, at uni, I met someone who could love me for who I was; I was with him for 7 years.

...and, now that I've given that advice, I must confess that I'm really considering giving up. I can't shoulder this burden of pain anymore. Knowing that, in "real life," I repulse all but the most heinous, moronic, and desperate of males leaves me feeling that I've got no other choice but to "let it go." I could attempt to focus on bettering myself and pursuing personal interests (I guess I ought to start cultivating some, eh?) if I weren't bogged down 24/7 by obsessing over my lack of a social life and "romantic"/sexual relationships. I just wonder if I can really go through with it, or if it's a signal that I'm simply in denial. How could I *truly* give up the desire? I'm not a saint, ffs.