Falling for a friend...

Post Reply New Topic

This girl is pretty much the first true friend I've had. We started off being friends, and we get along great. We enjoy talking to each other, and have a lot of fun hanging out together.

The odd part is that I've had strong feelings for her for quite a while now. I felt the connection was mutual, but wasn't entirely sure. Today I asked her how she would feel going out on a 'date', and from what I can gather the feelings are in fact mutual. We're going on our first 'date' tomorrow, even though we've been out several times as friends.

My question is, has anyone else had this happen to them? I get along so great with her as a friend, and it seems we both want the same things out of a relationship. I just hope it works out.

I always seem to fall for friends while feeling nothing for strangers... for me, how well I know a woman has a direct correlation on how much I like her. Yes, there are the standard factors of attraction to deal with. But generally, those factors will be marginalized if I don't know her to begin with...

Totally. My now-ex bf and I were friends before we became a couple, and we're still best friends in spite of the fact that we haven't been together as an "item" since 2004.
As I've said elsewhere at WP, I really can't imagine a "romantic" relationship starting any other way.

Now if only the general population thought like we do...

They can't; they're NT.

I've fallen for a couple friends. I never did anything because of my feelings.

Well then... would you be my, uh, friend?

Haha - sure!

I had it happen to me twice, with mixed results. The first time was with this girl and I (we now both go to the same college and we're both sophomores) and it was Valentine's Day, and although nothing romantic came of it, the date itself made us both very happy (she has bipolar and a form of cerebral palsy, and she's one of the smartest people I know). The second girl also goes to the same college, even though she's a freshman and we met through Facebook. This girl was the first girl I've ever kissed, but she and I were total opposites, but even though we don't talk, I am eternally grateful that she made me believe that there is a girl out there for me, and for that matter, anybody. You just need to look hard enough.

And in your case, you luckily didn't have to look far. My best wishes to both of you!

I would have to have a male friend first. Aside from internets, this has not happened.

Hey, if it weren't for these here Intarweb thingies, many of us would probably have no friends/no one to talk to at all. I've made some excellent online pals over the years who - shockingly! - turned out not to be chopped liver in "real life."

yeah, I'd definitely have very few people to talk to if it weren't for internets. At least with intarwebs you can find the people that share your interests VERY easily.

It is MUCH more difficult IRL.

I've only met like, a very few people from teh Interwebs in real life. And I had to go like 7000 KM to do so (coinciding with a trip to my sister's place)

i could say the same

I'll confess I had a few little feelings for a certain friend before. It was really just because she was the only close female friend I've had since starting puberty:p Now the idea of being attracted to her seems disturbing on so many levels. Anyway...I hope it all works out well for you. Just don't move too fast and throw away the friendship.

I have a side question. How is the "date" you are about to go to different from the time you went out "as friends"? I had that question for a long time so it is not exactly relevent to your situation, but still it is a good apportunity to get an actual answer since you can lay these two things side by side.

I'm NT and I dated and aspie that was my friend for 2 years prior to that. We are now married and happy.