Is it normal in an aspie...

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Is it normal for an aspie in his early 20s to only be attracted to girls in their mid teens? I'm not sexually attracted to them. I'm asexual, in fact. I just think they're cute, and I'd like to have a romantic relationship with one of them, even though I know that's impossible. I feel like I could be sort of a big brother figure to her and care for her. I really don't find adult women attractive at all. They're too serious and mature, too concerned with working and drinking and getting laid. I always got along best with people who were 4 or 5 years younger than me, because we were at the same maturity level. But now I'm getting to the age where people will look at my interactions with kids with suspicion, and think I'm some sort of predator, which I'm not. I just wish people wouldn't automatically assume that my intentions are sexual, because they really aren't. I just want someone to love.

Who doesn't think girls in their mid-teens are cute? (rhetorical question)
And ya I know what you mean, I'm not mature for my age either.

its obvious what this is your body has grown up but your mind hasnt at least not to the same place in many ways i still consider myself a child an do childish things so its not that abnormal your just going with what your mind can relate too cause lets face it adults are scary

I'm in college, and I'm surrounded by hot girls in their late teens and early to mid twenties, and they have no effect on me. I look at them and think, "Oh, she looks nice", then move on, without thinking about a relationship. Then I see younger girls like this: http://www.tigerlilyportraits.com/USERI ... r_Kiss.jpg and I think, "God, she's so pretty. I want her so bad." I'm going to try to find places where I can go to meet 15, 16, and 17 year old girls, maybe make some high-schooler friends and hope they can introduce me to one or two of them. I tend to blend in well with younger kids, because I look young myself, so it won't be hard. I hope people will know that I'm not looking for a sexual relationship, just love. I suppose I could date a 16 year old and not be harassed, because 16 is the age of consent in my state.

Last edited by LordoftheMonkeys on 12 Dec 2009, 3:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I am quite creeped out

I don't understand why it's okay for a 45 year old man to date an 18 year old girl, but not for a 20 year old guy to date a 16 year old girl. I'm not even planning to have sex with her. I'm asexual.

because the first one, is perfectly legal

I do suppose the second one is as you wont touch her, but its more creepy as people assume the worst
and they will

What is with this whole Legal = okay, Illegal = bad thing? Women voting used to be illegal. Barring black people from equal opportunity employment used to be legal. Besides, dating someone is not the same as having sex with them, and even if I was planning to, the age of consent in my state is 16, so an adult having sex with a 16 year old girl is perfectly legal.

oh well then you'll just get looked down upon

yes but things like that...I don't think it would be right to f**k a 13 year old
some laws are there because they need to be

that wasn't a very smart question
its like asking; this guy really pissed me off I think I wanna hit him over the head with a tire iron, why is that illegal

obviously not all laws are good laws
but most of them are

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Because 18 is legal and 16 isn't. If 16 is under the age of consent, it's going to be wrong for you to date him or her.
But if you two weren't having sex, there is nothing the police can do. It's not illegal to be with a minor just as a long as there is nothing sexual going on in between. But it can be seen bad to society so there would be lot of crap you'd be getting so you should keep it to yourself. Don't let anyone know you are with a teen under 18. Don't announce it on the forums. Don't let anyone know the girl is under 18.





Okay, you're safe.

A lot of people need rules to regulate their lives. It's much easier than making decisions on the fly based on the particulars of the situation. I think this is one reason people flock to religion - they need someone else to make the rules for them. A lot of people would replace "legal/illegal" with "the church says good/evil".

That's why society will look down on the relationship you describe. Society has designed its rules around the maturity of the persons involved. Rather than administering "maturity tests" every N months, society has decided that age is a decent representation of maturity in most cases. Enough cases anyway, that a general rule can be made.

I would suggest you follow the advice here and be careful if you decide to enter into such a relationship. Society will not be pleased and may decide to make an example out of you.

Lord of the Monkeys: Back off! If I saw you around one of my daughters, I'd be smashing your car with a crow bar. OK-- so you're asexual. What are the odds?

that was awesome
hi five for that

Wow harsh

Please ignore lelia's response. That served no purpose at all.
WP is exactly the right place for this discussion.
No honest question should be treated like that.

It's worth making a point that the laws don't represent a realistic view of the situation if it's acceptable for someone who is 35 or something to date someone who is 25 (10 year, 3/7 age difference) vs someone who is 18 to date someone who is 16 or something, (2 year, 1/9 age difference)