My dad needs help

Page 1 of 1 [ 8 posts ]

Previous topic | Next topic

bdhkhsfgk
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 May 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,450

31 Jan 2010, 12:32 pm

He has a tendency to look after women who only wants his money, any advice on how to convince him otherwise?

0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

31 Jan 2010, 12:40 pm

convice him otherwise? You mean convice him? How do you know he doesn't already know?

bdhkhsfgk
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 May 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,450

31 Jan 2010, 12:53 pm

I think he knows it, maybe he just gets brainwashed all the time.

0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

31 Jan 2010, 1:10 pm

If he knows it then he doesn't mind.

RhettOracle
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 10 Oct 2009
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 291
Location: Outta here

31 Jan 2010, 1:13 pm

I'm older than old enough to be your dad. Let me advise you, if I may:

Unless he is unusually receptive and open, there is nothing a father is interested in learning from his son where it concerns his love life. He's had a lifetime of relationships and you haven't. If your dad has spent much of his life thinking with his little brain instead of his big one, and getting taken advantage of, any of these things are going on:

a) He knows it and doesn't mind or care.
b) He hasn't learned from his mistakes and continues to make the same ones over and over.
c) The kind of women who are apt to want only his money are the only types of women he thinks he is capable of finding.
d) He is so socially and romantically inept that in some way he feels that the price he has to pay for intimacy with women is worth it, otherwise he would have none.
or e) he is a masochist, and drawn to live with drama and misery. Some people love to have a bad time. It's sick, I know.

Nobody would voluntarily put themselves in that position repeatedly if there wasn't something wildly askew in his personality. He gets something out of it that people like you and I don't understand. Maybe it's little more than laid, who knows? It is not for us to say, or to judge. It's his life, and if he wants to mess it up, he's perfectly entitled to, even though he has to pay a steep price for it, perhaps on an ongoing basis.

If you have a great relationship with your dad and you feel like he would be willing to discuss this with you, by all means go ahead. But there is the possibility that it may be met with anger and resentment and words like "who are you to tell me how to live?" and worse. So tread carefully.

Last edited by RhettOracle on 31 Jan 2010, 1:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.

bdhkhsfgk
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 May 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,450

31 Jan 2010, 1:15 pm

RhettOracle wrote:

I'm older than old enough to be your dad. Let me advise you, if I may:

Unless he is unusually receptive and open, there is nothing a father is interested in learning from his son where it concerns his love life. He's had a lifetime of them and you haven't. If your dad has spent much of his life thinking with his little brain instead of his big one, and getting taken advantage of, any of these things are going on:

a) He knows it and doesn't mind or care.
b) He hasn't learned from his mistakes and continues to make the same ones over and over.
c) The kind of women who are apt to want only his money are the only types of women he thinks he is capable of finding.
d) He is so socially and romantically inept that in some way he feels that the price he has to pay for intimacy with women is worth it, otherwise he would have none.
or e) he is a masochist, and drawn to live with drama and misery. Some people love to have a bad time. It's sick, I know.

Nobody would voluntarily put themselves in that position repeatedly if there wasn't something wildly askew in his personality. He gets something out of it that people like you and I don't understand. Maybe it's little more than laid, who knows? It is not for us to say, or to judge. It's his life, and if he wants to mess it up, he's perfectly entitled to, even though he has to pay a steep price for it, perhaps on an ongoing basis.

If you have a great relationship with your dad and you feel like he would be willing to discuss this with you, by all means go ahead. But there is the possibility that it may be met with anger and resentment and words like "who are you to tell me how to live?" and worse. So tread carefully.

I agree with pretty much everything you said there, he doesn't appear to have the best social skills.

Willard
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Mar 2008
Age: 65
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,647

31 Jan 2010, 1:19 pm

If he has enough money that it attracts women, he doesn't have a problem. :wink:

Unless he lets one of them take all of it. :evil:

sgrannel
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 20 Feb 2008
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,919

31 Jan 2010, 1:42 pm

bdhkhsfgk wrote:

He has a tendency to look after women who only wants his money, any advice on how to convince him otherwise?

How do you know they only want his money? Are they taking any of it? Of course they're looking at money! Maybe money isn't the only thing they're looking at, but it's part of the picture to at least some extent. This is like asking whether the politician is lying. Of course, sometimes, and some are better at hiding it than others.

The only way out of this predicament is to have him avoid contact with women altogether, that way you'll inherit his money. Having the experience of living well with little money, I can tell you that getting on with women is a lot more difficult without money. That's why men want money, because without it they go nowhere, relationshipwise.

_________________
A boy and his dog can go walking
A boy and his dog sometimes talk to each other
A boy and a dog can be happy sitting down in the woods on a log
But a dog knows his boy can go wrong

Page 1 of 1 [ 8 posts ]

Jump to:

My dad needs help Post Reply New Topic

My dad needs help