Have you are you yet to meet your first love

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How long did you wait before you found your first love? Is that relationship still continuing and how did you meet them?

I dated a few women in the time from August through December 2008. That's a pretty short time span, but I had just become confident enough to start dating so I wasn't going to let it go to waste. I ended up with the girl I love on January 10, 2009, and we're still together!

I found my first love in october 2009, but she broke up with me a month later. We're still friends and all that, but I'm back to being lonely...

I went head over heels for my ex-wife and was married for 10 years, 8 of which were amazing. I'd bet the farm she was on the spectrum but I didn't know I was AS during those years and would have refused to accept this reality even if I were diagnosed. I often wonder if we both had insight into our condition whether our marriage would have endured. After my divorce I dated a woman who was likewise either on the spectrum or the edge of it and who was in a constant state of emotional upheaval and nearly drove me crazy. Funny thing is that near the end of our relationship she accused me of being autistic because of my lack of empathy toward her overcharged feelings. In this case, my AS was a blessing in helping me terminate the sick relationship. She also asked me if I was gay which I' am not (not that there's anything wrong with that as Seinfeld would say.)

Prior to meeting my wife at age 30, I had a two year relationship with a similar woman who gushed feminine emotion 24/7. She likewise nearly drove me mad and I moved twenty miles away to get away from her. Those are the only three meaningful relationships I've had in my life.

My wife and I and were compatible because both of us were stoic when it came to emotions and both of us needed space and solitude from time to time.

Even if I never find another relationship at least I had the good fortune of finding true love once in my life. I hope all of you do as well.

I know everyone on the spectrum has different abilities and deficits but finding love did happen to me. But I believe notion that people with AS or autism lack "empathy" and are therefore incapable of loving someone is rubbish. The capacity for love and being stoic emotionally are two separate things and can co-exist. No one should consider themselves hopeless in finding a partner.

My first love was in high school. Her family moved to Europe for three years in the military, and split us up. When they returned, however, we picked up right where we left off, despite the fact that we both knew we were a disaster as a couple.

She got married for the first time a few years ago. I still hold a special place for her in my thoughts, though. You never forget your first love.

My first love was in university when I was 18. He was the first one I ever dated and I fell for him really hard and fast because we had so much in common (both pianists, nerds or outcasts in high school, both really into computers). He knew about my Asperger's syndrome too before I told him but he thought I was great anyway. Unfortunately I fell way too hard for him and we only dated 6 weeks and he broke up with me because we got too involved too quickly without too much of a basis of friendship. I really wanted to make love with him but he wasn't ready (wow, talk about role reversal!).

We're not friends anymore but if I saw him today, I'd probably flush red because I'll always have feelings for him but he's married with two children. I can't help how I feel about him though! Currently, I'm dating someone that I have more of a mature love for and he's bipolar and loves music, football and video games. We have more in common than my first love, I just hope that we'll get married someday.

My first love is my current one. And, we are both in our fifties. I had dated before, and even lived with one guy for a couple of years. But I didn't truly love any of them.

It isn't that you have to wait a certain number of years before your first love comes around, it's a timing issue about being in the right place at the right time.

I first met her when I was 22. She was seven years my junior and I was dating her cousin. Obviously at that time I wasn't interested as I had an ongoing relationship. However, add two years and end the currently relationship, I started dating her.

Even then, it really wasn't "love" in the sense of what I recognize now. Which is unfortunate. But what does a 24 year old guy know, especially when social cues are sorely lacking or simply not recognized.

Seven years later the relationship came to an end, through decisions on her end. Tears were on her side and I simply couldn't connect nor understand at that time.

More than a decade later, I still feel the sense of longing, the empty hole and the wonderment of "what could have been". However, I have never shed a tear.

Hindsight is often 20/20 and the truism of not knowing what you've lost until it's gone rings true. With all that, the heart feels hollow.