Have you ever had a gf/bf?

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I for one have never had a relationship(bi btw ). Just collecting information to see if its a 'normallity' in Aspies to have it tough on relationship problems.

Hell yes. I always get the dreaded "just friends" stuff - there's a couple times previously I could've had a relationship if I had actually gone for it. Too late.

A girl gave me a key yesterday though that I hadn't thought of. People keep saying to "stop looking" and that it will happen when you're not looking, but I finally asked how I'm supposed to do that. Was I supposed to ignore girls completely? I wasn't prepared to do that, and fortunately, that's not what I have to do. Turns out it's just a matter of acting around girls in the same way that you do around guys (or vice-versa). Why didn't I think of it that way before...

Meh, I'm on LavaLife now and already been contacted by a couple local girls. It's nice for a change to find girls who aren't from the snobby white-collar end of town and want something that is more than miniskirts and halter tops.

I guess in some respects I could be considered lucky by some... I did have boyfriends and all, most of them weren't attracted to me due to me being intelligent or having a good personality or that I was good at anything social or not.... when you have large assets (breasts), it doesn't take much at times to get a guy... problem is more times than not, they leave you when they realize that you're odd and all or only view you in the contact of having sex with. *shrugs* That's unfortunately the way most of mine were. I found a rare few that did appreciate me for my personality for a while till my differences annoyed them.

I have the opposite problem than most people, I have always had boyfriends and they get obsessive. I start dating a guy and no matter how he was when we met, by the time he has been with me for a few weeks he is totally clingy, saying "I love you" and talking about marriage, every guy I have dated for more than 3 months has proposed to me.

I have tried to head it off by dating guys who don't settle down (the bad boy/untamed thing I guess you could call it) I've tried telling them up front I have no interest in commitment and considering my personality they aren't gettng a mixed signal (don't know if it is the aspieness or if it is just me but I don't answer my phone, I break plans all the time because i just don't want to leave the house, I am not very touchy feely), I have tried dating casually more than one person (where they are aware of it, I wouldn't cheat) in the hopes that they would take that as a sign we aren't serious, doesn't seem to help. I have had to get 3 restraining orders against ex's who wouldn't take no for an answer when we broke up, and I keep my number unlisted.

The sad thing is these aren't weird or crazy guys when I meet them, they are successful, educated, good looking, independent, all that good stuff. And usually they are the guys that other women complain will never be commited, can't be with one woman ect. No matter what they all end up that way though. My family jokes and says that being with me causes insanity.

I was once in an online relationship, but I don't consider it a real one. So no. Never been on a date, never been kissed, etc. But believe me I have tried. The really frustrating thing was that I have successfully asked a few people out but the date would never happen because she'd always wind up being too busy/scheduling difficulties/etc.

nope

How old are you? I didn't start dating until a little later than most. My first relationship was in my teens.

How old is who?

I think Alex's question was for you, BladeRoden.

I was in a relationship when I was 10. Then I moved away from the city where this relationship happened. Nothing since then. Sometimes I rue the missed chances from girls at high school, who were undoubtedly interested, and often think of what might have been in relationships with them. But at the end of the day the girls were NEVER in my own year, or my own age, so staying out of relationships with them was sensible. I was also, without a doubt, 'love-shy', a term I have mentioned elsewhere on these forums.

I started dating when I was 13 but I didn't have my first proper relationship until I was 16, is this late?

I never went out on a real date until the age of 18. And I never had a girlfriend to this day (I'm 22). For the longest time, it really frustrated me. But six months ago, I discovered escort agencies in the Chicago area. That pretty much eliminated any frustration with not having had a girlfriend. I now view a romantic relationship purely as a job where the "job-related expenses" are far greater than the "salary" it pays you. I'm very content with spending $300 once a month for a one-hour appointment. It takes the edge off, keeps my self-esteem up, and doesn't require me to do any stupid romantic things. Most importantly, it's actually cheaper than "maintaining" most relationships.

I don't think you were a late developer, 13 seems an average enough age to start dating.

I started to become interested in dating at age 11. But now I'm 22 and I still haven't landed that first date yet. And if you can't get a date through the whole of your college years, what hope do you hold for afterwards when everyone else is marrying and having kids?

Urgh, I hear ya. Its so annoying.



No, it's early. People seem like they're always in relationships at young ages, but the reality is that they aren't.

I'm 21 and have never been in a relationship, kissed a girl, or any of that. Not even close.

Offline, I really don't know anyone and never have. It makes it difficult to start forming a social network.

When I was doing acting in High School I used to have stalkers, but my girlfriends never turned into stalkers.