Single and sad...

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I've been single so far of all my life. I've never really had anyone guy come up to me and say "hey there, whats your name? Want to hang out sometime?" Its so depressing. I've been the one asking and everytime it comes out horribly wrong. Thankfully the boys have been nice when they let me down, but it still hurts. I'm 21 now and it feels horrible. Both of my younger roommates have or had boyfriends and that makes it worse for me. I wish sometimes things were easier in life.
I'm an interesting person, I just feel sometimes my AS cripples me and takes me down and makes it impossible to attract a guy.
I'm guessing the guys feel the same way about the girls too.
Its just so sad for me. I try to get out there for someone to find me and me them and it just doesn't seem to work.
*Sigh*

same here too, except 2 years ago. this guy was certainly interested in me, but since i told him about my AS he hasn't contacted me. Sigh ... Perhaps you could attract intellectual nerds. My friend was one.

You're definitely not alone. I'm 18 and I have yet to attract anybody of the opposite sex. I'll admit it sucks. I'm in the same situation you are. The few friends I have, have all had dating experience, and I have yet to even kiss a girl. I wish you luck and hope things go better for you. If anyone here cares to shed light on this, it would be wonderful as well. One of my biggest fears is that I'll be single for the rest of my life. So far, it looks like that's just what is going to happen.

Something I had to have pointed out to me is sometimes shyness can be misinterpreted. If you are shy and feeling very self conscious you might hold yourself in a way that looks to others like you don't want to be approached.

I'd definitely say that might have some to do with the fact that I haven't attracted a girl. My eye blinking tic kicks in when I'm anxious about something and I'm sure it clearly shows. Even if that isn't it, I sure as hell know how to chase a girl away.

I had a brief relationship years ago (before I got dumped) and I remember he told me once I always looked like I was expecting something bad to happen.

Try not to worry. The most important thing that you said is that you get out and do things. When you do that you are making opportunities for yourself which is the best thing you can do to meet other people. If you keep doing this I am sure that you will find somebody. It may take a little longer but who cares? When it happens that won't even matter anymore. Just keep your head held high and do the things that give you satifsfaction in life. Just be you, relax and see what happens and trust it will happen naturally.

I get told that I expect something bad to happen a lot.

I don't recall being asked out either, at least not legitimately. This girl that moved in down the street claimed to be an admirer out of pity. Her entire family is psychotic. She was expelled from high school, and her sister nearly drank herself to death in middle school. But yeah, I am the one the needs pity. Idiots.

I know how you feel, buddy.

Hey there, whats your name? Want to hang out sometime?

I know the feeling. I'm 31 and have never had any kind of girlfriend / relationship. I just don't have a viable way to meet people. I don't really have any friends and don't like doing things by myself so I usually just stay home.

Get used to it. I'm not saying this to be mean, nor to imply that you'll never find someone. (How would I know? I can't foretell the future, unfortunately.) But in order to be truly happy (which, presumably, is your goal, right?) one first has to learn how to be truly happy on one's own. Predicating your happiness on finding a romantic partner is a recipe for disaster, especially if you're painfully shy and have AS.

Well at least the guys are nice to you in general. I've never experienced that.

One thing I have learned is that guys very very rarely come up and say stuff like that. Maybe in the movies, but not in real life.

I know what it feels like to think no one will ever like you enough to approach; I used to feel the same way, but put yourself in the guy's position; no one wants to put their neck on the line and ask out a perfect stranger. You did, and more power to you for doing so, but you still got shot down. At least you picked yourself up, but a lot of guys' egos won't let them try again, and a lot of girls don't try in the first place so that probably wrong-footed them a bit.

I can't say for sure, but I wonder if maybe there have been a few guys who were trying to sound you out, but figured you weren't interested. I did that myself, even at the same time wondering why 'no guy liked me'.

You should probably try and change how you act around people if you think that's a problem. I don't mean throw yourself at them, just smile and mirror their body language. I know it's easier said than done, and experience probably helps (catch 22 unfortunately), but if you are more open and friendly, you may get a more postive response. The more you talk to people (guys and girls) the more you will learn to differentiate 'interested' from 'not interested' behaviour, and if you do suspect someone's hitting on you and you like them, mirror their behaviour back. Don't wait until you are 100% certain they like you before you send out signals yourself; it can't be a one way thing or they will give up.

I'm 24, never had a serious relationship. I've sort of had to resort to the internet to ever finding hope for one. Most of my luck tends to be out of the region, which don't help much.

Local girls who are interested... later get turned off because of the AS. Or, they end up being so remarkably dull and uninteresting I have to push her away.