Question for members who are "religious"

Post Reply New Topic

Would you date someone who did not follow the same religion as you?

Why or why not?

Members who are atheist/agnostic please kindly contribute.

I'm atheist, and my girlfriend believes in god. Luckily she's United, and thinks I'm going to heaven anyway. ; )

Still, I probably wouldn't date someone who was hardcore evangelical, Jesus-affects-every-part-of-my-life, on account of I find talking to those kind of people really ... annoying.

I identify as a agnostic-theist. I've dated a die-hard Baptist turned I don't know what (interested in stuff like shamanism and Eastern religions, stuff I don't know much about), a "Christian" who really didn't know anything about it, and a self-proclaimed Atheist who scoffed at religion. Each one of us had agreements and differing beliefs in religion, ethics, morals, etc. This question is one I've been thinking about, and I don't think I can give it an exact answer. I would like someone with a similar enough way of thinking that our beliefs are somewhat similar, I don't just want someone that blindly follows the same religion as me.

I am agnostic and I wouldn't object to dating a religious person, as long as they don't try to force their beliefs on me. I live with a deeply religious person and we get along fine. She is convinced I am going to hell, but she doesn't try to convert me or "help" me.

I was a christian when I married and had a high level of moral/ethical beleifs, but over time have come to beleive that religion is the true root of all evil. I married a "christian" girl who held somewhat more liberal beleifs but overal we were pretty close.

We have both gone our own way spiritually. Now she beleives in ghosts and "'the light" as if everything you see on the Ghost Whisper show is a fact while I no longer beleive there is anything beyond the last molecule of O2 in my blood being metablized to CO2. Death is the end.

Yea, we're drifting apart in our beliefs. People change over time so even if you find someone just like you that is only going to be a snapshot and from that convergences come divergence.

I have strong spiritual and mystical beliefs.

The only time I could have a serious relationship with some other religion eg: Christian or an athiest is if they don't try and force their beliefs on me or others (if we ever had children for example)

Athiests often have a superiority complex and arrogance about them when talking the subject of religion.

All I really require is an open mind and some tolerance of anothers beliefs, while still respecting their own. If they can do that, so can I.

There is much more to a successful relationship than sharing a religion, and as long as no-one forces theirs on the other; fine. Sometimes it wont work if those religions are highly practiced, people tend to go their own way.

Last edited by hale_bopp on 24 May 2010, 9:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I would date a satanic devil worshiper if she was my type, so long as the blood sacrifice thing was kept on the down low. If we were to get married I wouldn't try to convert her, although we would discuss the futures of our children and let them decide when they were older.

And when we die, if my faith is correct, I'll fight to get her into the pearly gates, maybe see if we could get a two-for deal.

I wouldn't date someone of a different religion.

My wife would object.

I'm a Secular Humanist so I'm pretty liberal when it comes to religion. Having a partner who's religious wouldn't bother me as long as she would NOT pressure me to participate with her. Lots of people have suggested I join a church so I can find others who are also straight-edge because I am but I think it would be wrong & hypocritical of me to pretend to be something I'm not. I HATE when people preach to me but I do admire the moral values of some religions. As long as I get no pressure to conform to religion; I'm OK

I'm a secular humanist/agnostic in the sense the I can't prove that god or any of the spiritual stuff is really true, and that I believe people should take responsibility in general. I also believe it still makes sense to make good use of what is to be experienced in the here and now even if the most optimistic of the various religious scenarios turns out to be true. I would date someone with different beliefs as long as her beliefs aren't causing problems. No, this doesn't mean I would dump her for going slow with the sex or wanting to postpone sex until the start of marriage. However, I will write her off if she won't see me. I would also take issue with forgoing medical care, vaccines, dentistry and the like in hopes that prayer or some quackery will fix a treatable problem. Members of my own family have different beliefs, and I love and accept them anyway even if some of them are Cannibals.

I've had a woman explain to me that her religiousness doesn't make her dysfunctional for a marriage relationship, which is great, if it's true. However, she didn't give me the opportunity to evaluate her claim. Go figure.

Last edited by sgrannel on 25 May 2010, 2:42 am, edited 8 times in total.

I'm Catholic, and I wouldn't date outside my religion. Dating someone who doesn't share my most sacred beliefs would cause a huge rift between us and would most likely lead to arguments. More importantly, it would be detrimental to my spiritual well-being, something I'm not willing to compromise with any kind of relationship.

+1 Internets for ye.
You should probably bring your own lawyer.

Blood sacrifice? No, satanists aren't supposed to do that! They're forbidden to harm children and animals especially!

Pairing the religious person with the secular person is a great idea! If the religious person is right, then there's the aforementioned twofer. If the secular person is right, then at least one of them will have been saved from the abdication of responsibility and the throwing away of capacity for experience and critical thought, which possibly occur for nothing.

I'm deeply religious and lean more towards the Evangelical Conservative side.

I'm not picky about DATING girls from different religions. But casually "going out" a few times is different from a serious relationship. Also, if I'm in a serious relationship, I still don't have a problem if she's of a different religion as long as she understands that my beliefs are very important to me. I don't think it's wrong to share my beliefs with someone I'm seriously involved with, but I'm not going to ram that down someone's throat.

Of course, we're talking about dating and not marriage, which is an ENTIRELY different story. When my wife (who came from a long line of Methodists) and I started discussing the whole matter of religion, how we plan to raise our children in a religious community, etc., and knowing how how different our own backgrounds were and how important my beliefs are to me, we never reached a good, workable solution. I simply told her to pray about it and I'd do the same. Eventually she saw something in my church she felt was missing from her own, so the point became moot. She "converted" (not sure if that's the right word, we were both Christians to begin with) and that was that.

When it comes to dating and religion, I generally believe that "steel sharpens steel." I have a tendency to be a domineering guy when it comes to my faith. Even though I don't ram it down someone's throat and try to be tolerant, anyone who's ever been with me knows it's impossible to ignore long-term. I once dated a Unitarian/Universalist, which to me is a funny anti-religion under the guise of proclaiming all religions equal. For her, being dragged to church every Sunday (she could have said no and I'd have been fine with that) wasn't a problem because of her tolerant views of religion as a whole. This was something she was diligent about as long as we were together, but after breaking up she quickly fell away from it. I think it's BETTER to try to stick with someone you share a common faith with because you have the chance to hold each other to those beliefs. I actually have a part-time job at my church, and they rely on me so much that I can't just casually decide not to go. My wife finds it annoying sometimes because that makes it difficult for her NOT to go as well, especially since we have children (I'd just take them anyway, and then she'd be bored at home with nothing to do!). Her faith is much more "child-like" than mine, so even when I'm having some personal crisis, I lean on her to keep ME in line. So between the two of us, it's easy to hold onto our beliefs and keep our marriage and family strong because of how strongly each of us feels about it.

I'm NOT Catholic, but it sounds to me this isn't unlike what I believe. I think if there is a risk that you'll ultimately compromise your beliefs and practices, dating out of your religion should be off-limits.

I HAVE dated outside my denomination, but I hold unwavering beliefs in the basic tenets of Christianity. There wouldn't BE a compromise for me. However, the girl would have to ultimately decide if I was worth putting up with in that department to think about something long-term.