I completely hate dancing

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I mean, it's one thing if you're at a house club and just dancing for fun without a care in the world. I love doing that. However, if you're dancing with some girl who actually practices dancing and is judging you, it takes all of the fun out of it and you start to get self-conscious. Also, is there some connection between asperger's and having no rhythm? I know there's certainly a connection between asperger's and decreased coordination, and coordination is a gigantic component of rhythm.

I played guitar many hours a day for 4 years straight, managed to get into the 'prestigious' Berklee College of Music, and the first thing that convinced me that I'll never be a jazz musician is when one of the ear training instructors said "You need to relax, man. The way you conduct is so mechanical. In music, things are natural and free flowing." Interestingly, I got the same "you need to relax" line from my girlfriend when dancing last night. The thing is, I was relaxed!

That's OK, you're not alone in this one. The English have a great way of describing those with no dancing ability, 'two left feet', and it describes my abilities on my toes perfectly. I went to a British Public School and one of the things they (tried) to teach us was dancing, not disco, the formal stuff such as the foxtrot and the waltz. I was hopeless, but at least I got to hold a pretty girl called Diane around the waist

Fun fact, until the waltz was invented almost all dancing styles kept couples apart by a few feet. Once the waltz came along various dancing styles evolved where couples held each other much closer but they drifted apart again once modern music arrived in the late 1940's.

Vanilla_Slice

Yeah, I like to think I've managed to cover up most of the aspects of asperger's that used to hinder me in social situations. Although when it comes down to sports, dancing, and bantering, I got nothing. I'm like a fish out of water. Thank God I'm decent looking enough to get laid without all that much in the way of conversational skills.

Get lessons.

I feel ya. I don't even like social dancing like you described. That's why I play in a band.

I just hate dancing in general, formal or informal.

But in your case, I think the worst part is that the woman is judging you more so than the dancing. Part of why i have such a hard time with anything in a relationship is that i'm constantly worried about being judged. I keep trying to put my best forward, but I'm constantly worried that my best isn't good enough.

And people wonder why I don't exude confidence like I'm "supposed to"...

Yep.

Perhaps this subject has particular relevance to a present romantic interest of yours, but I wouldn't be too anxious about it in general. Dancing well is usually a luxury rather than a necessity. There will be women who don't go for men who don't dance well, but there will also be women who don't go for men whose nose is not a particular shape.