Having to learn?

Post Reply New Topic

I was going to call this thread something like "Taking love for granted", but then I saw there was another thread with the same title about something quite different.

I was wondering how many of you felt you were able, over the course of growing up, to delegate the role of showing love/caring for others/etc. to those around you. In other words, were you able to kind of partition the world into one category of people who is clever at discovering things in the physical world, talented at working and building with objects, etc. and another group who loves people, and uses that quality to build a loving community for the first type, with yourself among that former group?

One of the things I've come to think is that most people who would share my attitudes about relationships would almost necessarily have been able to do this, whether male or female. Once one has to learn to be emotionally and socially more integrated with everyone else, I suspect it may never be possible again to have as detached a perspective as I do, especially without having a clue of what it would be even like to be less detached.

is there a reason you posted this 3 times O.o?

I thought it didn't go through the first 2 times. When I clicked the button, it just stood there for over 5 minutes and never took me to the page that said it had been posted.

Though unfortunately, despite the accidental triple post, nobody has answered either of the three!

Last night(my time) the forums were doing some funny things, I tried to reply to something 3 or 4 times and it wouldn't load. I'm guessing everyone had similar problems.

If I understand you correctly, biostructure, then yes, I think it is easy to decide that one's strengths do not lie in 'caring' and let other people do that, while we get on with thinking and whatnot. Doesn't mean you can't learn how to care later on.

The point of this thread was to see how many women vs. men have felt they could do that. Maybe I should have made it clearer. I'm trying to test a theory of mine, that women find it considerably harder to do this, and that this fact explains some of the differences in how men and women approach sex.

*shrugs* I'm not sure.

Don't worry about the triple posting. We have all done that at one time or another.

I have spent much of my life in a default state of being uncaring and have to make an effort to do so. There are some things I care very much about, but I wasn't always caring and in the past could be quite disinterested, to put it nicely. I think it's less about gender than about Theory of Mind issues with AS.