I can't take the immorality any more

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I relate strongly to everything you said. I could have written your posts 4 years ago.

I wish I had some advice, but all that got me through my breakup was watching my hope of reconciliation slowly die.

You should just play your guitar, even if you dont really feel like it. There is something incredibly therapeutic about making sounds with an instrument.

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Samtoo, is there anyone like a therapist you could talk to? Are you in such a state that you need to call a hotline? Your last post with the Nirvana song makes me uneasy.

Can you examine why you are obsessing so badly? I agree, it's not going to get you anywhere.

I don't really understand your post. All I got was that you're depressed and your girlfriend is now a psycho. I can't really help you if you don't elaborate.

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Ah. I'm starting to understand a little bit more. I have the same problems with the stress. What my little brother and I do is when mom & dad fight, we go to my room, AKA the "bomb shelter" and play video games until it subsides. That tends to work. Replace your room with whatever room you feel safest in if necessary. And I don't really like the news either because it is kind of depressing.

To the point, if night-time is your issue, here are my personal favorite ideas for handling it. First off, get a night light. I know three-year-olds have them, but it's actually quite comforting to be able to see your stuff. Secondly, this may not work for everyone, but if you like to think up stories, do it. It keeps your mind off of the scary stuff that can run through your head when your mind is racing right before sleep. And thirdly, if you are able, stay up a little later. The later you stay up and do things, the faster you go to sleep and the less time you have to think about how crappy nighttime is. Hope this helps!

I used to go to sleep to escape. I could literally fall into a dream state at will. Could you go to bed early on nights you know will be rough?

I used to obsess (true, f****d up OCD style) when I played piano, so I had to take a break from it. Now I can play without those thoughts. Maybe going to bed early could serve a similar purpose. Or what about signing up for a class of some sort? That can hep take your mind off things sometimes. Being taken out of your element can sometimes help.

jpfudgeworth: Yes indeed - playing guitar can soothe the pain a lot. At times during the day I feel stressed if I am not playing the guitar.

BroncosRtheBest: Ah yes - it is people just feeling stressed and grim rather than a fight - stuff like that just gets to me.
The problem is I stay up far too late because I want something nice to happen and soothe the depression, but it is difficult to get that sometimes and completely help myself feel well.

happymusic: I am thinking of going back to College - that might help me play music and socialize a little bit.
College might add structure and make me go to bed as well, thinking about the day ahead rather than stressing about the past. Sometimes thinking about the present can be a help, but I haven't done that for a while.

Thank you everyone. I am going to sleep now. My ex girlfriend talked in the end and I have relaxed a bit.