Are aspies and NTs compatible in romantic relationships?

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I would appreciate any input. Thanks

In my experience yes

Depends on the individuals involved. It can work out, yes, if they're right for each other. But it could equally fail. IMO, personality is more important than neurology anyway - whether they're NT or Aspie dosen't really matter.

Simple answer.... yes.

Why would they not be?

It depends

I wholeheartedly agree!

Thanks!

Yes, and to that I would add "character".

My wife and I are actually committed to each other, and each with the other's well-being placed first.

Irregardless of neurology, two selfish or self-centered self-will-run-riots will *always* end up bumping heads.

Sure they can it just takes a bit more time to adjust to each other i would think. love conquers all ( if thats how you spell it )

I think my girlfriend and I work out perfectly. I'm most likely on the spectrum, she's not on the spectrum but she's not a "normal" NT... But I agree with what Asp-Z wrote. It's more about personality than neurology. She could be an NT but really rude, and you could be an AS but really nice. it depends.

Agree'd

That depends on how long you expect the 'relationship' to last. True Autism is not compatible with long term relationships of any kind. If you're capable of one, you don't have Autism, its that simple. Its kind of the defining characteristic of Autism, being permanently disconnected from other people. 'Locked inside one's self' - aut-ism.

No, Willard, "permanently disconnected" is not synonymous with "not compatible with long term relationships of any kind".

My wife and I are "permanently committed", not "connected".

I agree with leejosepho. I do agree that it's possible people with autism will never feel that "as one" connected-ness that NTs might feel while in a relationship, but being in a long term relationship just means your committed to that person.

... and all of that with no offense intended against you, Willard. It was only after a few years of roaring my way through the lives of a few women that I finally realized I was looking for love in the wrong way while merely trying to find it for myself. Most of the women I had known had truly tried to "connect", but none of their efforts ever really satisfied me while I still had that old "better to give than to receive" saying turned around. Today I can have from my wife anything she has to give, but I remain silent and just give what I can while accepting only whatever she offers ... at least most of the time!

As an NT woman with an HFA boyfriend, I think we're very compatible. I don't know whether he feels 'connected' to me like I feel connected to him, but my side of the relationship feels very close and committed. Honestly, I feel more 'connected' with him than I have with a lot of NT guys. He has also said many times that he feels like we have a special connection.

I think part of what helps us is that we're both very honest with each other, and we are aware of and okay with the fact that our brains are wired differently. Sometimes what I'm doing or thinking makes no sense to him, and sometimes what he's doing or thinking makes no sense to me, but we don't get upset with each other for this. We have so much else in common that it doesn't matter as much.

I agree with Willard. If a supposed aspie or autistic male is successfully in a long term relationship, either they aren't autistic, or their partner is just very understanding and almost like a third parent. Any kind of NT women will get sick of the Aspie features sooner or later. It's almost like trying to pair a skinhead and a black woman...not going to happen.

Unfortunately for the Aspie community, for some reason it's become en vogue to have Aspergers, and a lot of people diagnose themselves, when they're really just nerdy or an outcast.