Do you feel sympathetic for somebody who can not have sex?

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Do you feel sympathetic for somebody who can not have sex?
Yes - and I am a man 51%  51%  [ 23 ]
No - and I am a man 11%  11%  [ 5 ]
Yes - and I am a woman 16%  16%  [ 7 ]
No - and I am a woman 22%  22%  [ 10 ]
Total votes : 45

JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:07 pm

Because their circumstances, such as chronic social ineptness, prevent them from having that experience?

I know I've asked this question before, but the way I worded it was kind of awkward so I am not sure if it was well understood.

Why or why not?

Please explain.



Ambrose_Rotten
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14 Sep 2010, 12:12 pm

There's a lot of factors...

When you say "someone who cannot have sex," I think you mean "someone who has poor luck with those that he or she is attracted to."

I feel a little bad for those folks from time to time, but I would definitely feel more bad for someone who desires sex, but is physically incapable of having sex.

Both of my examples fit into your your title question.



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:15 pm

Ambrose_Rotten wrote:
There's a lot of factors...

When you say "someone who cannot have sex," I think you mean "someone who has poor luck with those that he or she is attracted to."

I feel a little bad for those folks from time to time, but I would definitely feel more bad for someone who desires sex, but is physically incapable of having sex.

Both of my examples fit into your your title question.


Why do you feel only a "little bad" for those folks? For my own self I am in both categories. I can not physically have sex and I have social difficulties that make forming a relationship based on heterosexual attraction difficult.

So how do you feel about me given that I am in both categories?



menintights
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14 Sep 2010, 12:21 pm

Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:23 pm

menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


So do you believe that being able to have sex makes you a better person than other people?



Ambrose_Rotten
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14 Sep 2010, 12:23 pm

JohnisBlind wrote:
Ambrose_Rotten wrote:
There's a lot of factors...

When you say "someone who cannot have sex," I think you mean "someone who has poor luck with those that he or she is attracted to."

I feel a little bad for those folks from time to time, but I would definitely feel more bad for someone who desires sex, but is physically incapable of having sex.

Both of my examples fit into your your title question.


Why do you feel only a "little bad" for those folks?


Because luck can change.

JohnisBlind wrote:
For my own self I am in both categories. I can not physically have sex and I have social difficulties that make forming a relationship based on heterosexual attraction difficult. So how do you feel about me given that I am in both categories?


While my instinct is to feel bad for you, I do not think that would help you at all. If there is something else in life that will make you happy, you should pursue that, rather than getting stuck on something that will make you unhappy.


EDIT: On second thought, I kind of want to change my answer to "no," simply on the grounds that sympathy will not help anybody improve their lives. Don't take what I'm saying the wrong way, because I don't envy your situation. I would like to help you lead a better, happier life (if that is possible for me to do), and I can't do that with sympathy.



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:40 pm

menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Do you realize how you just implied that all the men and women on this board who do not experience sex are worthless? Do you realize how hurtful the comment you just made was to me and to other people?



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:50 pm

Ambrose_Rotten wrote:
JohnisBlind wrote:
Ambrose_Rotten wrote:
There's a lot of factors...

When you say "someone who cannot have sex," I think you mean "someone who has poor luck with those that he or she is attracted to."

I feel a little bad for those folks from time to time, but I would definitely feel more bad for someone who desires sex, but is physically incapable of having sex.

Both of my examples fit into your your title question.


Why do you feel only a "little bad" for those folks?


Because luck can change.

JohnisBlind wrote:
For my own self I am in both categories. I can not physically have sex and I have social difficulties that make forming a relationship based on heterosexual attraction difficult. So how do you feel about me given that I am in both categories?


While my instinct is to feel bad for you, I do not think that would help you at all. If there is something else in life that will make you happy, you should pursue that, rather than getting stuck on something that will make you unhappy.


EDIT: On second thought, I kind of want to change my answer to "no," simply on the grounds that sympathy will not help anybody improve their lives. Don't take what I'm saying the wrong way, because I don't envy your situation. I would like to help you lead a better, happier life (if that is possible for me to do), and I can't do that with sympathy.


Okay, I am only trying to get a grasp of why people are sympathetic or not.



deadeyexx
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14 Sep 2010, 12:52 pm

JohnisBlind wrote:
menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


So do you believe that being able to have sex makes you a better person than other people?


It kind of does. Not about the sex itself, but the ability to get what you want. I feel intimidated by people who can navigate society better than me. Is it fair that even though I'm more qualified, another person gets a job over me because they have a friend working at that place? No, but in this unfair world, it's something we have to contend with. Likewise, if I find myself with the upper hand somehow, I have no qualms about using it.

Same here. Although you may have serious dissadvantages in your ability to have sex, it's something you have to deal with. Work with the strengths you do have to get what you're looking for.

All this talk of pity, fairness, and who deserves what is useless. It simply doesn't matter.



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 12:54 pm

menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Quote:
Do you realize how you just implied that all the men and women on this board who do not experience sex are worthless? Do you realize how hurtful the comment you just made was to me and to other people?


Edit: The purpose of my question was to figure out why or why not people are sympathetic toward a person not having sex. So I can forgive you for writing that, it was what I asked for anyways.



JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 1:00 pm

deadeyexx wrote:
JohnisBlind wrote:
menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


So do you believe that being able to have sex makes you a better person than other people?


It kind of does. Not about the sex itself, but the ability to get what you want. I feel intimidated by people who can navigate society better than me. Is it fair that even though I'm more qualified, another person gets a job over me because they have a friend working at that place? No, but in this unfair world, it's something we have to contend with. Likewise, if I find myself with the upper hand somehow, I have no qualms about using it.

Same here. Although you may have serious dissadvantages in your ability to have sex, it's something you have to deal with. Work with the strengths you do have to get what you're looking for.

All this talk of pity, fairness, and who deserves what is useless. It simply doesn't matter.


You believe that the ability to get what you want makes a person a better person?

I am tempted to argue with you but I simply want to hear why people are sympathetic or not. Not to criticize their beliefs even If I feel I really want to.



DemonAbyss10
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14 Sep 2010, 1:05 pm

JohnisBlind wrote:
menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Do you realize how you just implied that all the men and women on this board who do not experience sex are worthless? Do you realize how hurtful the comment you just made was to me and to other people?


I havent gotten any and I totally agree with the privelidge comment. The only purpose of sex is to continue the human race, which is something I am against. And he didnt call them worthless, simply because how much sex n s**t you get does not indicate your worth.


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JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 1:10 pm

DemonAbyss10 wrote:
JohnisBlind wrote:
menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Do you realize how you just implied that all the men and women on this board who do not experience sex are worthless? Do you realize how hurtful the comment you just made was to me and to other people?


I havent gotten any and I totally agree with the privelidge comment. The only purpose of sex is to continue the human race, which is something I am against. And he didnt call them worthless, simply because how much sex n sh** you get does not indicate your worth.


I think you articulated your beliefs on why you are or ar not sympathetic toward people who can not have sex with a high degree of clarity. Thank you.



DemonAbyss10
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14 Sep 2010, 1:23 pm

JohnisBlind wrote:
DemonAbyss10 wrote:
JohnisBlind wrote:
menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Do you realize how you just implied that all the men and women on this board who do not experience sex are worthless? Do you realize how hurtful the comment you just made was to me and to other people?


I havent gotten any and I totally agree with the privelidge comment. The only purpose of sex is to continue the human race, which is something I am against. And he didnt call them worthless, simply because how much sex n sh** you get does not indicate your worth.


I think you articulated your beliefs on why you are or ar not sympathetic toward people who can not have sex with a high degree of clarity. Thank you.


That was only part of it to be honest. I actually chose to be asexual because of my belief that there are too many people. Plus I judge people on other things, such as creativity. In fact I judge those that try to get in bed with everyone as lower than dung, because they go completely against my own ideals. Now as for sympathies, its a bit different. I can feel sorry for those who are totally incapable physically. I can also feel a tiny bit towards those who try but have gotten nowhere simply because I used to care about it back when I was an ignorant teenager.

In the end its really all a choice of the individuals involved. I do think the trend of Sex being an indicator of worth is just something propagated by the media and business in order to gain more money. I don't think that is gonna change though, sadly.


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JohnisBlind
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14 Sep 2010, 1:28 pm

It looks like their are more people who say they are sympathetic (based on the poll) then their are people speaking up and expressing their opinion about it,



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14 Sep 2010, 1:31 pm

menintights wrote:
Not at all. :D

Sex is a privilege, not a right. If you can't get any, then you probably don't deserve any. And for all the emphasis on sex, it also isn't a necessity for survival. All these people who are always whining about being the last virgin on earth need to quit treating it as such.


Have to disagree there.

There are kind, upright, decent people who can't get any due to lacking social skills or some other problem.


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