My partner acts ignorant to my AS

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Every time I try and open up to my partner about my aspergers it's like he shuts his ears to what I have to say. On a number of occasions I have sent him email links to descriptions of how it affects me, and even written things down for him to read but it's like he can't be bothered and then he will say he is too stupid to understand because I used too many "big words". It is really frustrating, as I want to try and help him to understand me and to be as open with him as possible, but I struggle with putting myself across verbally and also with trying to find the right time to bring up the subject.

I just mentioned this website and said it was helping me to understand my condition better, and tried to open up and he just dismissed it with a very sarcastic "that's nice." I feel stupid for saying anything to him now

Hi, Im glad this site helps you. But all I can say is
He sounds rude and has lack of empathy.

Some people are not comfortable talking about "conditions" and "syndromes" and "mental health" problems which the general public all lump together in the "too weird for me to understand, don't want to know" category.

The manor in which he is expressing his discomfort with the subject matter is rather childish and not considerate of your feelings on the subject. So perhaps you need to be more blunt and direct with him and actually make him aware that it is important for him to understand your condition in order to understand you. That having aspergers impacts on your entire way of being but it does not rule your life. Otherwise further down the line when he wonders why you do such things he's going to not have the knowledge and understand to be able to deal with such situations.

To be fair I couldn't put up with someone who demonstrated such a callious disregard for something that explains the excentric oddities of my persona.

We have been together for 6 years and he has put up with me for this long but there are a lot of things that I do that I can't help that he gets annoyed with me for, or he thinks I'm being an a***hole or insensitive or lazy for reasons connected to my AS. I spent a long time being ashamed of my condition, and even though I told him about it early on in the relationship I never went into a great deal of detail, and now that I feel more able to be open about it then I thought it would be the right thing to want to share that with him. But he doesn't seem all that interested.

I often see autistic traits in him too and wonder if he has it undiagnosed, but he refuses to see a psychologist and says no-one can help him and that he is too "stupid" to have AS, which makes it harder to discuss it with him too. I wish he would see someone so that he could at least rule it out but I can't force him.

I dont consider guys like that even worth my love or my time.

Sounds like my grandmother, in terms of accepting my AS. My advice would be to simply avoid talking about it, and when it's unavoidable to take your time in making sure you use the right words to convey what you're trying to say.

Easier said than done, but some people just have difficulties accepting conditions, especially when it concerns someone they care about. They don't "see" it and so, in their eyes, it doesn't exist. All you can really do is be clear when you talk about it and give him time to process it. Whether he accepts it or not is anyone's guess, for your sake I hope he will.

I also couldn't get my ex to read about it and his excuse was "it won't tell anything about Beth" but my last ex managed to read about it and he realized he had it too. My husband read a short description about autism however and then never again.

I also suspected my ex of having it too, the one who refused to read about it, but everyone said he was an a-hole. I think he maybe had traits of it instead.