What is with these other AS people

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I mean the ones that are good looking, smart, and more advanced than others. They think people like me can go out and have the same success (dating, making friends) they do by "trying hard" which obviously isn't the case. You're either ugly or you're not, you're ether smart or you're not. You're born with more functioning than other people on the spectrum, so of course you'll have success if you work a little hard because you're closer to normal than the lower people.

It makes me sick as I've lurked for years and I've seen this over and over again. People being chastised by the more successful people because they didn't follow their advice on how to get friends and spouses. News flash, they probably tried it in the past and it never worked.

You don't know any of these people, you don't what their faces look like, how they dress, how they act, and what level functioning they are. If person's a 28-35 year old virgin there's a reason for it. It's not there fault, they can't help it. There's no hope

Why don't you people just admit just f*****g admit that there's no hope for people like me. I've been alone my whole life. I've never kissed a girl, and I haven't so much as hugged one in about 5 years. The one true "friend" I used to have used me a punch bag when we got around other people. I was too ret*d and pathetic to realize to tell him to stop. The other friends I've had throughout life weren't really friends. They just used me for stuff I had. Then when we were in public, they'd talked about me and run down my house is.

They'd ditch me when it was time to meet girls. I was pathetic, and I still am. I've tried everything, but no matter what everyone treats me the same. Girls giggled and laughed at me. They'd talk down to me because I'm so slow and dumb, and of course no decent looking chick in her right mind would want to be seen in public with me.

I'm ugly, I'm so stupid that I couldn't get past elementary school, I'm poor, I'm boring, interesting, and annoying to hang out with for an extended period of time. I'm a bum, I have nothing to offer anyone.


See, there are people that can't be saved. Just tell them to give up on socializing, dating, and getting the world to accept them because it's futile, and tell them to focus on other interests that makes them happy. If they can't live that way then they have other another option...

It does bother me when people take it upon themselves to say how they were like you once and how they did X, Y, and Z and how much better their lives now are and how if you do everything they're did they're bound to find the same kind of happiness they have and if you don't it's obviously because you're not trying hard enough. These people really need to get off their high horse and realize that everyone has a different starting point and is stuck in a different circumstance and that maybe--just maybe--they're just lucky.

I am, however, a fan of telling people that if they're not willing to take some action about their situation they need to shut up and quit whining. All talk and no walk makes Jack a dull boy.

Because I don't believe it.

Ditto.

And btw, what did this have to do with love and/or dating?

Be more at home in the Haven?
People are more understanding and such there, i think?

ps. i'm forever the optimist - so things can always get better for you, your life is not worth giving up on.

you have a roof over your head, food in your stomach etc. lots of people have a lot less hope than you and keep going.

keep calm & carry on!

You sound like someone who cares too much. Imagine how much other people care about you. Are they writing pages on how sorry they feel about you? If not, then stop worrying so much about fitting in with them.

You have nothing to lose, and that's a more powerful edge than you realize. The world is your playground.

Unlike those with complicated and involved lives, you have the ability to be selfish and do whatever amuses you.

it has a bunch to do with love and dating, did you read the entire post?

We may be all different, but we all come from the same place and we're all capable of the same.

It's all a matter of willingness. If you're willing to be social, regardless of what's happened in the past, you'll be able to do it. If you let past mistakes get you down, if you start disliking yourself, you will fail.

You have to stop thinking things are hopeless, or things will be hopeless. If you believe there's no hope for yourself then there will be no hope for yourself. You have to try hard.

And stop telling yourself such horrid things. You complain that you've tried everything, try complimenting yourself instead of hating on yourself.

See that's the problem I do care and I can't stop worrying. I want friends that care about me. Friends to go to different places with. (mall, parties, concerts, road trips, etc) Friends that treat me like their equal and aren't afraid to be seen with me in public.

I also want a decent looking girl who's nice, kind, and have similar interests to me, but I know it's nothing more than dreams.

Because I'm too f****d up and weird for anyone to have anything to do with me.

It's a hopeless situation, and I'm not the only one.

I think you will mostly find this only happens when the poster is asking for advice. What you describe above is just that, advice.

As to the OP, he is a conundrum. He doesn't want advice, he just wants to tell everyone how awful he is each and every day. He doesn't want advice and he doesn't want anyone coming along and telling him things will get better. He wants to say negative things about himself and then .... he doesn't even seem to know. (Underpants ........ profit?) When pressed yesterday he claimed he just wanted someone to tell him it is okay to kill himself. I suggested better sites to obtain his wishes but he seems quite attached to this one. He loves to crap on your optimism and take grave offense to any advice offered his way. I am starting to think the drama generated is his ultimate goal, though I can't claim to understand or even imagine what he gets out of it.

So, buck up MR20. Things get better. You aren't as (fill in the blank) as you think.

And definitely screw all those successful people. They must not have tried or they would have failed. They must have had their lives handed to them as a gift by the alien overlords.

@MidlifeAspie - all your replies to everything really speak to me. I always look forward to reading your posts. I have no idea why I felt the need to tell you this.

in bold

I'll say it again, as long as you believe things to be hopeless it will be.

Where did I tell you to fit in?

I told you to try complimenting yourself, and stop hating on yourself.

Last edited by Jonsi on 14 Jan 2011, 3:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Agreed!

Just to make me feel awesome I guess, cuz it did. Thank you

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