Are some aspies attached to the one they love?

Page 1 of 1 [ 11 posts ] 

draco989
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 3

18 Jan 2011, 9:31 pm

I find that I'm really attached to my girlfriend and I really love her. I just wanna know if that's normal for an aspie



hyperbole
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Oct 2010
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,208
Location: my desk

18 Jan 2011, 9:51 pm

I can be very needy at times and clingy..... but other times I just need to be left alone. so I'm just weird. I need more alone time that together time for sure.


_________________
"Your knowledge of what is going on can only be superficial and relative" ...WS Burroughs


Pistonhead
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jun 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,732
Location: Bradenton, Florida

18 Jan 2011, 9:54 pm

How long have you been with her? If you say less than 6 months I'd be more amazed if you weren't attached.


_________________
"Some ideals are worth dying for"
==tOGoWPO==


vileseagulls
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 82
Location: Australia

18 Jan 2011, 9:56 pm

How else would you be? If you're in love with someone you should be attached, unless I'm misunderstanding how you mean that word.

The only time it's not appropriate is if it bothers her or she's not attached to the same degree.



MarkMartino
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 30 Dec 2010
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 85
Location: Houston

18 Jan 2011, 9:58 pm

Yes. Although sometimes I'd be hard-pressed to define a difference between "love" and "codependence." I'm not sure there is a difference, but I think there's supposed to be.


_________________
"Has anyone ever told you that you're a bit weird?"
"They never really stop."
(Doctor Who/The Lodger/by Gareth Roberts)


draco989
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 3

18 Jan 2011, 10:11 pm

We've been together for almost two years and she broke up with me on Saturday but we got back together because she's giving me a second chance. She used to be in love with me a lot. In her words deeply in love. Anyways she says I have a 45% chance of her loving me deeply again. Idk what to do and I am really attached to her. I know the subject changed a bit and I'm sorry for that



Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

18 Jan 2011, 11:01 pm

I think it's standard for most people, regardless of autistic status, to be attached to their loved ones.

MarkMartino wrote:
Although sometimes I'd be hard-pressed to define a difference between "love" and "codependence." I'm not sure there is a difference, but I think there's supposed to be.


I'm quite confident that there is a difference. There are a few people I love and I am not dependent upon any of them. I don't need them, but I care for them deeply. I know you meant romantic love, but my answer in this way would be the same. I have none now, but have had in the past. I did not need them, either, but I loved them dearly.

And I love your signature quote, MarkMartino. :) The Doctor was very relatable in that episode.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."


Oren
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,058
Location: United States

18 Jan 2011, 11:14 pm

Autistic. My husband on the spectrum. I am very attached for many years.


_________________
Semi-Savant


draco989
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 3

19 Jan 2011, 12:06 am

Kaybee wrote:
I think it's standard for most people, regardless of autistic status, to be attached to their loved ones.

MarkMartino wrote:
Although sometimes I'd be hard-pressed to define a difference between "love" and "codependence." I'm not sure there is a difference, but I think there's supposed to be.


I'm quite confident that there is a difference. There are a few people I love and I am not dependent upon any of them. I don't need them, but I care for them deeply. I know you meant romantic love, but my answer in this way would be the same. I have none now, but have had in the past. I did not need them, either, but I loved them dearly.

And I love your signature quote, MarkMartino. :) The Doctor was very relatable in that episode.

Well thanks for your opinons guys. I just thought it was because I don't think anyone else I know is clingy so yeah or needs their loved one to get through the day. I am a bit obsessed too so yeah.



boosterjones
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2009
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 269
Location: Liverpool

19 Jan 2011, 3:26 pm

I often felt very attached and protective to the girlfriends that I've had in the past, but as always I like to have my own space from time to time each day.



bee33
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Apr 2008
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,392

19 Jan 2011, 4:47 pm

I think that loyalty and and almost childlike devotion can be AS traits. I know I have felt that way with my long term partners, and now that my bf left me, I feel really lost and it's been very difficult.