Are men not as flirtatious as they used to be

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This is just my experience and your mileage may vary...

I find that men were a whole lot more flirtatious in the 1980s and early 90s. Something in our culture has changed, but don't know what.

People in America GENERALLY are not as friendly as they used to be either. I guess we have ipods, cell phones, i pads , TV and the Internet to thank for that huh?

Here in the South a man will get the door for you, that is a given. But I miss the days when men and boys were a lot more solicitous.

Chivalry is dead and boys wlil be boys and never men. On a serious note though, Our culture is becoming unsupportive of traditional courting/dating. So Males are wussing out on asking Females on a date in preference of "Hanging out". It's kind of sad actually. Espically when one takes the effort to take a women on a date and they don't treat it serious. "Casual Friend Dating" is a epidemic that must stop!! !!

I don't know. I find it almost impossible to flirt with others while I'm in a relationship and that's been a long time.

It may be the sexual harrassment laws and attention drawn to them. That caution might have bled over to other areas. It might also have something to do with the frank nature of online communications. It seems very easy to slide from stranger to intimate contact. Maybe some flirting time has been squeezed out as a result.

Not having grown up in the era of online dating I find it strange to see people here agonizing over their profiles, nature of the emails, etc. I feel like I'm giving them advice on chatting up and asking women out that doesnt specifically apply to the new world. It seems easier today but I don't really know. It just appears that way.

I don't know about now in comparison to the '80s and '90s, but I feel like a lot of guys will ignore girls or even go so far as to be rude to them so the girl is aware that he is not interested. Like guys assume if they are as polite and friendly to me/other girls as they would be to any other human being, I'll assume he likes me and be all weird about it. It's hard to hang out with guys like that.

Here's the messages young men are receiving:

- Women are equals, you don't have to open the door for them or treat them like a weaker species.
- Women are sex objects in music videos, hoochees, hoes, sluts, b*****s, and whatever other names are thrown in casual conversation to refer to women.
- You need to get yours before anybody gets theirs, don't worry about other people. Take care of you.

Is it any wonder young men don't know how to act with women? The messages are clear: don't open doors, don't treat her with respect, use her for sex, and don't ever put anyone as more important than yourself.

Men and women need to be considerate of one another. Dating needs to be a nice meal. If a man wants to be with a woman, he should plan a special evening and pay all the expenses for it. He should treat her with respect, open doors, have manners and be genuinely interested in finding out if she's the kind of person he wants to continue to have in his life. If she's also interested in him, she should plan special evenings and occasions together, taking the expense to make those happen, and having good manners. One should always say "thank you" when the other does something nice for them. There should be a revealed interest in physical intimacy but there should be no pressure so that it happens when both people are ready for it and can continue the relationship afterward.

I mean, there are ways to do things now, but there's just not good messages out there for young people to encourage them to make good choices for romance and love. The last thing I knew about was called The Rules book and that was a complete disaster of a thing.

Maybe they flirt with you less because you're older.
I expect it to happen to me.

I used to hold the door for my last crush, offer my jacket if she vocalized that she was cold, etc. She yelled at me a lot for it, because "she can take care of herself."

And then her mother yelled at her for finally getting a good guy and treating him like crap.

Her sisters thought she was crazy, too.

I'd also add a fear of claims of sexual harassment. I had a professor who got booted from his office over allegations of sexual harassment, and I knew him well enough that he'd NEVER do that. He had a sharp sense of humor, and I believe this is what got misconstrued. You have to be careful what you say, what you joke about. I'm terrified to ask out any girl I work with, for fear it might alter the work environment or make her feel uncomfortable.

And it's a shame really. You hear those stories about how men would pursue women, and they would fall in love and it's all very romantic. Why, I remember the story of a passenger on the Titanic who was in love with a woman. So he arranged to follow her on a month long europe trip, and followed her back, on the Titanic. Both survived and got married. How about that?

I'd also say women aren't grateful, and they do want to be treated disrespectfully. Because nice guys are beneath them. There was a girl I like, and I sent her on valentine's day a box of homebaked cookies and a book. Did the b***h even thank me? Nope. Just sent an email saying she wasn't interested. 'Course, looking back I'm glad it didn't work out, because she's a low level corporate drone doing meaningless things, and will undoubtedly get fat and old and not matter worth s**t in life. I'm better than that, and better than her!

I agree with brianruns about some things. Here's a video to explain why men often keep to themselves nowadays:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RBYgEZqrJs[/youtube]

Okay, that was on the extreme end, but that's the basic idea.

I am going to have to agree with some of the sentiments people have given so far but go into my own reasons for choosing them.

A lot has changed in our society, talking about America sorry non-Americans, over the past twenty years. The women's liberation movement, ie feminism, sexual harassment becoming a larger problem for some reason, etc etc. All of this combines into a society where men and women as well can't flirt or even show affection for other people without it getting misconstrued.

For example I work in a building with a lot of women, just the field I am in, now I have to be really careful what I say, even around people I know well, because at any time I could be reported for saying something inappropriate. Now I am not going to be going around and saying nice tits or ass to someone but even an innocuous comment like I really like your blouse or you look really pretty today could be taken out of context. For some reason the society here has gone in the opposite direction and we are more paranoid about everything for some reason. I just want to give compliments to people to make them feel good about themselves that is who I am but it sucks when have the crap in my head can't be said because I am a guy and I don't know how someone is going to take it, which is compounded by me not always understanding every social situation correctly and being paranoid I might do something wrong.

Then you throw in feminism, not that its a bad thing it is something I like, but it is something women are going to have to figure out in terms of how they want to be treated you can't have things both ways. You can't be liberated as they say and still have people do the traditional things; I know some would agree but you can't. You can't be strong and independent and still have people treat you like you need everything handed to you, bad choice of words I know but it is all I can think up of now. Now I believe in treating everyone equally and with respect and when they are special to treat them like they should be but you have to ask yourself when enough is enough.

As for music videos and stuff well that is another problem our society is facing. And we also live in a society that is very me centric, gotta get me mine before someone gets it from me.

The more complicated our society gets, the harder everything is, including dating. Complicated people are selfish people.

I have no idea how I'd know. Might as well ask a carrot.

Maybe all the sexual harassment litigation puts people off. Maybe guys are too busy keeping their s**t together and roofs over their heads to go bothering women. Maybe the Oestrogen they put in the water supply kicked in.