This question is going to sound stupid, but . . .

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Yeah, how the f**k do relationships work?

I've look all over the net, and all I can find are instructions on how to do advanced and over-the-top stunts like hugging, cuddling, kissing, sex, and utilizing psychic abilities! This is all way over my head, and I'm having trouble finding any good guides or walkthoughs that teach me the basics. I recently found out that me and my best friend are mutually interested in each other, and neither of us have any clue on what to do other than have long awkward silences and hold hands. So it's imperative that I get some information before we do anything stupid and ruin our friendship/romance!

Thanks in advance!

Beats me.

not too sure myself but according to the last 3 girls I dated and the one that currently won't leave me alone and continually stalks my every movement(we work together). You as the male must give up all your time and free energy to "be there" for said girl and if you don't have free time or energy well then you better well make or find some.

That being said the better relationships I've had always seem to be the type were we agree we enjoy having sex with each other, like the same food and movies. Those rarely last too long though.

Ideally in a relationship I would hope to find someone that would enjoy supporting me and my interests, as I would do the same for them. I'm really starting to think that's not gonna happen.

Ahh... dude. That is called a "s**t test" and you failed big time.

If a girl can wrap you around her finger then she will lose respect for you and eventually dump you.

YOU must keep HER on the hop. You must be the one to snap your fingers to make her come running.
Make HER work to deserve YOUR attention and affection.

Glad I'm not alone!



. . . I'm not male (biologically), but my friend/partner is. Not that I don't think that'd be a problem, though. Would it?

I'm not sure if I'd want my partner to devote all of his time to me, frankly. While I do like him and I like to spend time with him, both of us have friends (most of which that we both share) and family that we could spending free time with as well, and I don't want to have that taken away from me (Nor do I want to take that away from him). Do we really need to devote ourselves to eachother to the point that we ignore others in order to have a successful relationship?

We both like video games, are socially awkward, and we play D&D with several of our friends (which he DMs), so that's covered. Neither of us are anywhere near ready for sex, though (We're still in highschool)



Uhhh, that goes both ways, right? I'm not sure if I'd feel comfortable having to work for a relationship while the guy does nothing. Mutuality and all that.

same here

Ok. I think you might be overthinking this a bit.

Having a life outside of eachother is healthy, having friends that you share and hang out with in a group is healthy, and having free time just to yourself is also healthy. Devoting all of your time to eachother... well it seems to make some people happy, but if you don't want to do that then don't.

As far as I'm concerned, a relationship is a lot like having a really close friendship. We don't bother about "being coupley". Most of the time we just go to the pub together or go for walks or have dinner or watch films or play video games. Basically we do the things that we did before we were in a relationship but often with more hugging and such. If you want to hug or kiss or hold hands then go for it. Basically just go and do things that you both find fun and don't feel that you have to go faster than you're comfortable with.

well see the reason it didn't work out is I did make them work for my attention, and I didn't get dumped hehe I dumped them. Constant telephone calls and text messages while I'm trying to sort through homework or an engine is a sure fire way to make me loss all respect or interest in you. I just think at this point in my life I have no time for another person insecure BS so I have little patience for it. Another part of it is I want a partner not a servant, I have no interest in playing social games like this, and I will refuse to do it. I assume this is why the whole fu*K buddy situation has always worked out best for me. Both people involved are too busy to deal with the standard relationship BS that seems to be rampant in culture today and when you really break it down we just enjoy a very simple type of relationship.



NO don't really it sounds like you two are off to a fine start, my little rant was just that a rant =P Just because you support each other doesn't mean you ignore other aspects of your life especially in the beginning part of a relationship. As you can probably tell I'm not the best person to get relationship advice from, I tend to fail at them pretty badly. But the one thing I can say with confidence is that anyone that clings on to you and loses their own identity in a relationship becomes rather boring quickly. I tend to lose interest(at an exponential rate) in girls that use a relationship with me to form an identity. Wanting to spend time with someone you met is fine, wanting to spend every waking hour and expecting the same from me is not. I have interests, hobbies, responsibilities, and goals that I had way before I met them and these will last long after they are gone. SO no don't devote yourselves to each other to the point of ignoring everything else in your life, enjoy your time together and enjoy your time alone.

Not even NTs can tell you exactly how relationships work, you just gotta go with it when it happens

A spark is required.

You spend time together eating, playing games, watching movies, chatting and you grow closer, talk about deeper things, develop a deep caring.

You meet someone, have a good time, fall in love, live happily ever after.

Only if you're in a Disney movie.

I wish. :3
I'll love to be Belle.

Yea, the "s**t test" idea seems quite true for realtionships. The only freind i have who's in a relatioship atm is a disaster, basically his gf demands that he submits himself to her completely, i get the impression he would want a more ideal relationship, but his self esteem is so low that he keeps getting back together with her every time they've broken up(usually about every month lol).

so im guessing his gf has lost repsect for him, therefore thinks that he can be controlled easily. its a pretty immature relatioship considering that their about 18 but she's pretty unattractive (to me anyway) and he doesn't really exhibit alpha male characteristics, an example of this being that he can't just drop the relationship and find one that satisfies his needs, so i see their relationship as a kinda compromise.

Uh, no. That's not Disney.

Disney is:
You meet someone, you fall in love, you contract with an evil witch to be able to see your love again by staking your soul, you save a nation of people with the help of your animal friends while defeating the evil witch, and then live happily ever after.

Then Dreamworks would be the same but with a better plotline, better jokes and better animation.