Yes, I think you should look for a website / app that is designed primarily for people who want friends that may lead to a relationship.
As otherwise you are going to be bombarded by predatory males, who most the time just want to sleep with you,
then move on, including men who are already in other relationships and some who may even be married.
A fair percentage of men are like this, really don't care who they hurt, all their interested is getting what they want, ideally from everyone all the time. Some are even very good at managing many relationships at once, often employing a psychological strategy called compartmentalising, which generally involves in playing several different people during their regular week, and which separates all the different relationships out into compartments (so that no one ever finds out what lying bar stools they are).
Personally, from an ASD perspective. I am extremely sensitive to being lied to.
My ex-wife, who ironically projected the image that she was a Jehovah Witness and as pure as the day is long,
employed this psychological strategy of compartmentalising on me, while having relationships with several other people including some of her old boyfriends who were actually into heavy / black metal and satanism.
So she played the Jehovah Witness most the time around me (while subjecting me to extreme religious lifestyle restrictions even though i was not a Jehovah Witness), while she pretended to be a different person while around these other people. Problem was, she wasn't very good at compartmentalising in that her heavy metal satanist side spilled out into her compartment of a life with me, with her attempting to sacrifice me to the devil on full moons and other rediculous things likely encouraged by the men who she was cheating on me with.
yes. people who "compartmentalise" are extremely damaging to be involved with, unless you are very tolerant of dishonesty, sadism, slander, general manipulative sociopaths.
That said, some of the men on Badoo may be fine and you may be more than fine with them.
I can't judge them. I don't know them.
Knowing men and being a man, and being in my 40s however, i have seen a lot of different types of human behaviour and sadly have been shocked by the immoral behaviour of even people who i thought were really nice good people.
I think that there are only a very few people who i actually would trust to not try it on with my girl friend (if i had one)
Although i think that there are different standards from one culture to another.
Btw. I waited 3 years before sleeping with my nuts ex-wife, due to the religious restrictions that she imposed (if she wasn't completely lying about that too!). By the time i did sleep with her, she had basically betrayed my trust in every possible way, and had basically committed every type of breach of the rules that she imposed on me due to her Jehovah Witness religion, that the greater part of me had lost respect for her and really didn't trust her (this happens if someone is lied to constantly at every possible opportunity).
I really regret speaking to her, getting involved with her, as well as waiting for her.
That was however not a stereotypical relationship, so please do not be put off relationships due to my bad experiences.
If you are looking for someone to get on with, and perhaps develop the friendship slowly into a relationship.
perhaps join a enthusiasts club in your area based around an interest or activity that you enjoy doing.
Then perhaps you may have a better chance of meeting not only someone who you like before jumping straight into bed with them, but also someone who you share values, and interests with. Which i think is perhaps essential for success in relationships, as after the initial honey moon period is over, you really have to love the person you are with and both parties have to be fair and really faithful for the relationship to work, unless you are the type of person who likes and can cope with cheating / open relationships.
good luck
30 Nov 2020, 11:07 pm
