Types and meeting your ideal

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If I look back at the types of men I have had relationships with and been out with, I notice that they do not fall into a specific type in both looks and personality. In fact they are all completely different. I think that to have type is restrictive and, by being selective in this manner, you may miss or never find your true match. I believe that when you meet your true match, you know it and that he/she can come in any form whether it be your type or not.

What are others opinions on this?

My thoughts on that which you're probably ignore anyway would say that I agree no one can tell if one has found their true match. If you have found the match but something about that person or you told made you go away. Like I thought I met the person but instead I was wrong. Well I don't think I know that person. I don't if I'll find that match.

It seems perfectly sensible to have tried dating completely different types of people. This gives a person more well-rounded experience. And in a persons younger years, that is what dating is all about -- gaining relationship and people experience. As a person gains more experience, I would think they tend to settle down more and have a better idea of what they want and focus more on that. I have reached a point where I am now fairly clear about what I want.

Yeah, I think its definitely great to be really open to just about anyone and not have really fixed TYPES. but you know, you need to have some sort of traits you look for in people. I mean, you have to narrow it down SOMEWHAT. For instance, if you two have very different spiritual or moral beliefs, or if you two are COMPLETELY different personality types and COMPLETELY different interests, and you can't even communicate or appreciate each other! Ahhhh but ofcourse THIS is obvious. It's not so much about knowing your types as your 'MUST AVOID' types. And then anyone else is game.

But then, its always good to have like turn ons. Or you know, preferred types. It can be the difference between someone being decent and being "HEL-LO!!" Lol.

Sometimes you try and tell yourself 'he must be tall'. And then suddenly you can't stop looking at this guy who is a total shorty, but there is just something about him anyway. Nobody is perfect. I've been surprised by the variety of looks and personalities in the guys I've had crushes on. But now, there is someone ficitional I want - so rediculously awesome and perfect that I wonder if he has successfully destroyed my taste in REAL men forever lol. Well nah. I also got my first boyfriend while I was into this guy and he was significantly less than perfect, yet I didnt see it. So I think I'll be ok.

I have an ideal, yes. But that's only ideal in terms of genes that would potentially be passed on to children because I selfishly want them to stand a better chance of x, y and z. But as I say, that's selfish of me and they may hate what I want for them. So yes I have an ideal but I also realise there's no point trying to hold put for that because the most important thing is the person they are, not the body they are. And I don't have a type because I can't think of a type, and because I've only really fallen for one person. I've had crushes, yes, but they've all been superficial feelings and ... yeah. they were just silly crushes.

Though I do have one firm requirement - they have to have the same faith as me, because I've seen what can happen if a Witness marries a non-Witness, and I really don't want that to have to be me.

Other requirements - male, preferably around my age, and that we click.

I agree with you Fiz in that you probably will miss your match when your trying to place men or girls in types. If you like this type of person over another you could just lose your mate that is for you because you have this mind set that you don't like this type of person.

My type is a girl who likes me.

All the girls I've gone out and had relationships with have one big thing in common.

They don't exist! What are the odds, am I right?

I can't describe any particular look, other than I know it when I see it. Same with personality, though I could probably nail that down to a degree if I wanted to analyse it properly.


Apart from that I generally I have something of a rough mental checklist I go through for more tangible things whenever I meet a potential partner. What goes through my mind is something like this (after passing initial visual inspection)

[Note: I generally rate these on something of a sliding scale from Acceptable to Blackmarks (stuff that will not result in immediate dismissal, but they will need to be good or outstanding match in other areas for me to allow this) to Instant dismissal (I just can't live with that, so it's goodbye)]


Age: should be about the same, too much younger or older and it's a bit weird, I am getting more flexible on this as I get older and age gaps dont seem quite as odd.

Height: Preferably shorter than me, same height Ok, taller is generally bad. A tiny bit taller might be acceptable if she makes up for it elsewhere, but waay taller and it's just no good, the black mark gets stronger for every inch taller than me.

Pets: no pets=good, cats/fish & other types of pets that aren't annoying=acceptable, dogs, birds & other exotic or weird pets = black mark (I particularly hate dogs for various reasons I wont go into here, so an extra black mark for dogs)

Misc Weird stuff: Not sure how to catergorise this, think of it like the 'man hands' episode of Seinfeld, just something odd or out of place that freaks me out, like arms hairier than mine or having a subtle but noticeable moustache, not a good look for a woman (yes I have encountered these, it's pretty much instant dismissal unless it's really minor).

Tattoos: Instand dismissal. I admit I have been wondering if I could deal with one of those tiny tattoos that are barely noticeable, but I really really dont like them (To clarify: I have no problem if other people like/want them, just dont blame me if I dont like it)

Piercings: Moderate piercings like ears are ok, the odd belly button or nose I can almost live with especially if she later grows out of it, but major amounts of, or just weird piercings are a big no no. I'll give a black mark as she can probably change this later, so it's not necessarily instant dismissal, but very close and a bit variable.

Wrong Opinions: Whilst I generally like an intelligent opinionated women and actually dont mind different opinions to my own, as long as they are backed up well enough. I do have to draw the line at people with extreme opinions one way or another or people not willing to listen to alternative opinions or points of view.

I think thats it.

When I look back over previous dates I do see some weird correlations, not in personality, but in appearence. eg First 3 girlfriends were all blondes, then a couple of brunettes, followed by 3x Asians, then the last two have been Indian or thereabouts. Unlike some people I have no real fetish or anything for any particular race or look, but I do seem to have grouped them together somewhat, which is strange. I'm wondering if this will continue or if it's just a weird coincidence.

I don't have a "type" in terms of looks, but I've got a lot of must-haves as far as other things go. I'm not interested in being less picky, either.

I'd pity the person (woman) be stuck with me. To be honest. What woman would?

I'm in a down mode. . .sorry everyone.