What should I do?

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There is this really pretty girl that I'm obsessed with, she's black mixed with German(born and raised in Germany for three or four years) which is absolutely amazing to me because I've always been interested in German things as a part of my heritage and I only like black girls so it feels like a nice rare combination that I won't find again. She is also interested in cars, guns, and videogames, like I am. She also has repeatedly emphasized that she likes likes white guys, mentioning kissing this guy with freckles and orange hair in 3rd grade like every day and she has also outright said that she prefers white guys. She has also calmed me down and told me everything's O.K. in a nice soft voice when I was half-seriously insulting a stoplight for pissing me off earlier, she did that rather than ridicule me like most people would've, and I LOVED that feeling of her calming me down. I also had eventually told her(bad idea I know) some way or another that I had never kissed, had sex with, or even held hands with a girl, and she told me to give her my hand and then we held it for about 5 seconds and she said now I can tell people I've at least done that. She also said "I love you" in a friendly way when I went back to my house to get my cigarettes, and then I said "I love you too", and then she said "YES!! !!" and then I was very happy until I got back. And the night before, she did this weird thing when I pointed out how I wanted a gun on TV, and everyone was like "MARTY!!", and then I said I like guns and then she turned around was lookin at me for a long time with kind of a caring look, and I was drunk so I couldn't read it right so I just answered with a "You really wanna challenge me" look or something like that

But I feel like less and less she's showing that she likes me every time I see her, and I feel like it might be because I'm not showing I like her enough, because I'm afraid to, and it kills me and makes me hate myself for it. It turns out she also actually does still like my friend, even though she tells everybody in our group that she doesn't talk to him like that anymore, which surprised me because I always thought he was just coddling her because he didn't know any better but it turns out they're actually talking to each other like almost all the time every day. And another girl in the group is telling me I shouldn't have let myself get "sucked into the vortex" because she is so mentally screwed up from her past(mother abused her as a child and she's also been to an insane asylum for (I think) suicidal tendencies, she's talked about both) that she just walks all over everybody's feelings without caring that she's doing it, but I feel like that girl might possibly be jealous but I don't know.

Now I can't stop thinking about her no matter what I do, because I associate her with almost everything I'm interested in, all of the aforementioned things in addition to eating fast food or being in my car or listening to my music or anything because it all reminds me of good times I've had with her. I haven't been this obsessed with girl in years and I feel nothing but pain now just thinking about what I'm doing wrong, because I feel like I'm a good match, and she is interested but I'm messing it up for myself by not being assertive enough.

Should I keep trying for this girl? I don't know if I'll find another prospect for a while, and especially not one that I liked this much, although the other girl that was warning me said she was gonna start talking to girls for me and directing them to me but I don't know for sure how well that's gonna work out or if she's even really gonna do it.

To be blunt, it sounds like you should start trying with this girl, you're clearly into her. But you're exactly right, she's not gonna keep throwing out hints to you if you do not act on them, that comes off as a no and then they move on. So yeah, you gotta either do the really scary thing and be honest about your feelings or accept that you aren't ready to be that open to her and let her go.
As for how exactly to approach her, you should probably hope some other forumers can help out there it's not exactly my area of expertise(assuming you want it to go well, if you want it to go badly i'm your guy ) )

Honestly things were going well before, but then one night we got on the subject of the stuff I hadn't done and then I said I was still content with what I had, and then my friend that likes her just railed me bringing up how I get really depressed about that stuff right in front of her, and my confidence around her hasn't been the same since even though it still seemed like she liked me, just a little bit less.

I just gotta bring it back and start complementing her for real and making it more obvious because I really don't say much and I just need the natural confidence back, I just get drunk thinking that'll help but it just makes me feel crappier when I don't do anything and then another guy walks/drives her home. An all-out "I like you" speech for some reason doesn't seem out of the question in my head, and I usually have a sense for that type of thing now, but nonetheless I think just stepping my game back up would be good. I've been meaning to exchange numbers with her as well so she doesn't have to go through the other guy to get rides from me and stuff(for gas money of course). That should be a good sign of interest I would think.

I feel like I must've been giving off some negative vibes to people every night since then. I need to just forget the fact that he grilled me like that and acknowledge that she doesn't care about that.