It's so hard to imagine not being alone

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It just seems like such a huge chasm between reality as it is now and ever being with someone. When I like someone and I see them going about their daily life, see their posts on facebook, I feel like they are so far removed from me that there's no way to cross the gap.

It just seems impossible.

Nothing ever happens, nothing ever will.

I feel the same how would start conversation with them like what is the first word do you say to them.

Even if I already know them and talk to them every week, it still feels like such a huge leap from that to something more.

Ok here's my verbatim paraphrase of FB's login source code:

"Do you have some kind of name (yes/no/maybe)? Ok."
>>commence inexorable, nonconsensual data log of vapid advertising-relevant commodity information.

There is no gap.

I feel this way often. IMO it's normally an indicator to me that they aren't the right person because there doesn't seem to be any natural draw to one another like fluid conversations, liking of each others' media or interests.

Are you saying you can't imagine being with anyone though, as in a proper relationship? I guess I feel that way, too.

Yes.... Not with ANYONE

Theres always this little connection, a bit of flirting, but it never grows.

I never have anything deeper than a shallow connection and then I meet someone else and the cycle repeats.

You'll make a good companion....definitely.

You saw someone you like on Facebook? Is he single? You should message him on Facebook and ask him out!


Wrong! Something might happen after you ask him out on Facebook.

Don't spend the rest of your life wondering what might have been!

This issomebody I already know who I'm stalking on Facebook lol.

To reiterate, Facebook doesn't substantially do anything. It's nothing but a double-blind which funnels advertising dollars away from their sources, users like you & anyone else on there.

It's a reminder that another person has a life that you know nothing about. There's no party photos, just pretty boring photos if I'm honest, my facebook page is more interesting than his, but I just feel like, I don't really know this person. I suppose it's the same as if I see him in the Supermarket. It reminds me that I don't know what he likes to eat, that I don't really know all that much about him. I only know that I like his personality around work and how he talks to me and to other people.

But we have our own lives, in our own bubbles.

Nah that's other people, not some website. It doesn't do anything new & hasn't really ever done so. If the goal is to block out one's entire life with 'Block user' buttons then it's perfect I suppose but that's not really worth pawning every personal detail for nothing.

I'm not even demystifying anything; FB simply isn't real & their M.O. has nothing to do with helping people communicate. They have multiple daily meetings over how to turn your friends into stock options, nobody there appreciates them as people.

This thread isn't about Facebook, it's about sonder. Realizing “that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own”

I do love that word, which is why I was pointing out a bunch of unethical code that made me realize people invest their entire lives in subverting others' empathy & perception. Upon realizing Silicon Valley was munching hard drugs & in short order, routinely building psychological experiments into such applications, I decided to let others be the only way I ever interact with that nonsense & it's done a lot for me. There's no reason to feel creepy about learning who people are.

Don't let a bunch of washed up PHP developers & venture capitalists direct you, ever.

If you already know him you can ask him out in person. Instead of trying to view his life through Facebook, be a part of his life.

I tried to write a longer answer, but I keep geting logged out.

I Feel like once he gets to know me he'll reject me.