For those of you Aspies who did a break up...

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just a poll question...

If you don't mind telling, I'd like to hear more of your situation and what you were thinking after the break up.

This poll is missing an option. We remained friends for a little bit but kept fighting & ended up insulting each other so much we burned the bridge of ever getting back together. I alternated between wanting to get back together & feeling like I got royally screwed.

This exactly!! !

Oh break-ups are complicated. ;D

oh sorry forgot about that option

Any more people have something to say on this?

None of these apply to me so I picked the first one.

Initially I tried to keep contact but he was just acting like a butt hurt jerk so I cut him off.

different options for different past relationships.

^did you ever cut off contact for a while and returned to your ex after that time period?

my former husband and i broke up 8 times in the 4 years before we got married. i am very, very good at pushing people away from me, and he was a rare sort who wouldn't let himself be pushed.

now that we are in the process of separating, we are best friends but would not get back together. we are not the same people we were, with those crazy passionate feelings for each other. so there is no attraction or draw to pull us together. i guess you could say the fire is out and the ashes are cold.

the 8 times you broke up, did you do the break up or did he? Also, if you did the break up, did you cut off all contact? How long did it take for you two to get back together during those break ups?

i broke up with him most of the times (i think one time it was mutual). we stayed apart anywhere from 1 day to 4 months.

sometimes we broke off all contact, and sometimes we stayed friends. once we tried a "friends with benefits" thing.

ok, thanks. Was your husband always the one who made the first move to get back together?

yes, except the final time it was kind of mutual, after the 4 month breakup (also our families conspired to help that to happen).

Did you miss your partner during the break ups? DId you feel like you wanted to be back with him?

I know you may not be talking to me, but - yes. But I realised this did me no good, so I allowed myself to feel sad and to miss him whilst managing the emotions realistically, and eventually managed to get over this.

i usually started dating someone else fairly quickly, but i still missed him.

I was thinking they had to leave.

I was also:

a) angry at them and myself for things I've sacrificed and time wasted on something I really knew was not going anywhere.

b) terrified because I was now a single mom.

c) heartbroken (probably from feelings of betrayal rather than love cause I don't know if I really loved them).

d) lost because the comfort of this familiar presence was gone

Can't cutoff contact because we have children.

*That was many years ago and we have become more civil. I don't harbor any hate toward them. I do wish them happiness as I see we are all better off.