If it turned out your partner was transsexual...

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Noop
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01 Aug 2011, 5:02 am

How would you feel about it?



izzeme
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01 Aug 2011, 5:07 am

well, since i haven't been in that situation yet, i can't be sure.
however, i dont think i'd mind, as long as we are in an exlusive relationship



Chronos
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01 Aug 2011, 5:10 am

Noop wrote:
How would you feel about it?


Impressed. That would be a pretty masculine former woman.



Roman
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01 Aug 2011, 5:13 am

I would break up. Even if it looks like a woman it would still feel like I am "with a man"; so being straight that would be unbearable. I guess it goes both ways whether it be man turned into woman or woman turned into man. I guess I simply can't stand the idea that I am "dating a man", so I want to steer clear of any situations that could be construed as such.



Noop
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01 Aug 2011, 5:23 am

Roman wrote:
I would break up. Even if it looks like a woman it would still feel like I am "with a man"; so being straight that would be unbearable. I guess it goes both ways whether it be man turned into woman or woman turned into man. I guess I simply can't stand the idea that I am "dating a man", so I want to steer clear of any situations that could be construed as such.

:?

The only 'manly' thing about a MtF would be their chromosomes to be honest...



Dingo7
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01 Aug 2011, 5:33 am

I guess i would go with it and try it at least... but it would be pretty weird...


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dunbots
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01 Aug 2011, 5:35 am

I'm pansexual, so it wouldn't bother me. Although, their lack of honesty would be a problem.



fallen_angel
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01 Aug 2011, 6:58 am

It would not bother me. Somehow it would be okay; I love the personality in someone and who they are. If transsexuality would be a part of them, I could handle that. Sure it would mean the person was not honest with me from the beginning, but I guess it's hard to be open in that case and people fear rejection. I think it would need some communication, the try to see the other side and understanding from both sides.



Henbane
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01 Aug 2011, 7:15 am

No problem. As long as there was honesty in the relationship. It's a person's soul that matters to me, not their bits.



fallen_angel
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01 Aug 2011, 7:37 am

I wish to add this to my comment:

Henbane wrote:
No problem. As long as there was honesty in the relationship. It's a person's soul that matters to me, not their bits.


I totally agree with you and I love the way you did put it : ) it's important if that person was honest with their feelings for me.



IT
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01 Aug 2011, 7:52 am

That would make the relationship rather interesting. :D
I wouldn't mind.



Roman
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01 Aug 2011, 9:03 am

Noop wrote:
Roman wrote:
I would break up. Even if it looks like a woman it would still feel like I am "with a man"; so being straight that would be unbearable. I guess it goes both ways whether it be man turned into woman or woman turned into man. I guess I simply can't stand the idea that I am "dating a man", so I want to steer clear of any situations that could be construed as such.

:?

The only 'manly' thing about a MtF would be their chromosomes to be honest...


Well if you define gender based on chromosomes, then this would be quite a huge thing and you can't refer to it as "only".

Now you can't make a convincing case that chromosomes are not the right way of defining gender. After all, this would require you to come up with some other definition of gender. And that other definition can logically be dismissed as insignificant in the same way as you are dismissing chromosomes as such.

I guess the point is that if someone is transexual, it is "controversial" whether it is a man or a woman. And I would rather not deal with this controversy. I don't like the idea that the person whom I date can be "construed to be a man" in any way what so ever.



TeaEarlGreyHot
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01 Aug 2011, 9:43 am

Indifferent. I'm pansexual. :shrug:


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minervx
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01 Aug 2011, 10:05 am

I would be disgusted and appalled and would end it.



Noop
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01 Aug 2011, 10:11 am

Roman wrote:
Noop wrote:
Roman wrote:
I would break up. Even if it looks like a woman it would still feel like I am "with a man"; so being straight that would be unbearable. I guess it goes both ways whether it be man turned into woman or woman turned into man. I guess I simply can't stand the idea that I am "dating a man", so I want to steer clear of any situations that could be construed as such.

:?

The only 'manly' thing about a MtF would be their chromosomes to be honest...


Well if you define gender based on chromosomes, then this would be quite a huge thing and you can't refer to it as "only".

Now you can't make a convincing case that chromosomes are not the right way of defining gender. After all, this would require you to come up with some other definition of gender. And that other definition can logically be dismissed as insignificant in the same way as you are dismissing chromosomes as such.

I guess the point is that if someone is transexual, it is "controversial" whether it is a man or a woman. And I would rather not deal with this controversy. I don't like the idea that the person whom I date can be "construed to be a man" in any way what so ever.

Ever heard of the saying 'If it looks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, it's a duck'? Gender is provably not based on chromosomes. Birth sex is, however. But when you 'swap' the primary & secondary sex characteristics using surgery & hormones, who's to say they're not their 'new' sex?

For example, if you remove a tumour from a person, it is true that they once that tumour, but it is now gone. It would be silly to say they have the tumour when they no longer do, surely?

Also, it's best to not call people of ambiguous gender 'it', as it often comes across as describing them as not human, like an object. Transgender & transsexual people should also be referred to using the pronouns they identify with (usually either 'he' or 'she') to avoid any offense.



Noop
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01 Aug 2011, 10:13 am

minervx wrote:
I would be disgusted and appalled and would end it.

Why 'disgusted' in particular?