I'm single again.

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Joined: 12 Nov 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 207

25 Dec 2011, 3:12 pm

So I finally did the right thing and let my boyfriend go. I will always remember what a great person he was to me, but I'm not done finding myself. As good as he was, he was not the one for me for many reasons. I was with him because he was safe and because I was so afraid of getting hurt. I'm going to share some advice with you guys, because I know what it feels like to be lonely and desperate for a relationship. Please do not settle because you're afraid to be vulnerable. You're going to get your heart broken, it becomes easier the more it breaks, I promise. Play your cards right, keep your cool, and keep your options open. I learned a lot about myself throughout my relationship, and a lot of things were a real eye opener for me. Looking back, I realized why no one wanted me. I could have had the guys that I liked, because we would go out of dates, but I would scare them off never knowing why. It's CLEAR to me now why I scared them off. Lesson learned, time to find my soulmate.

Tim_Tex
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25 Dec 2011, 3:21 pm

I am sorry it didn't work out. I hope you can find Mr. Right some day.

cathylynn
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25 Dec 2011, 3:27 pm

to the OP - cool profile picture.

ManicMinx
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25 Dec 2011, 3:48 pm

Thanks to both of you

nick007
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25 Dec 2011, 6:21 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:

I am sorry it didn't work out. I hope you can find Mr. Right some day.

Same here but I'm also glad your being positive about things & see it as a learning experience. I went through my 2nd breakup at the begging of the month myself; your welcome to PM me if you'd want to talk or blow off steam or anything

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ToadOfSteel
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25 Dec 2011, 7:11 pm

ManicMinx wrote:

Please do not settle because you're afraid to be vulnerable. You're going to get your heart broken, it becomes easier the more it breaks, I promise. Play your cards right, keep your cool, and keep your options open. I learned a lot about myself throughout my relationship, and a lot of things were a real eye opener for me. Looking back, I realized why no one wanted me. I could have had the guys that I liked, because we would go out of dates, but I would scare them off never knowing why. It's CLEAR to me now why I scared them off. Lesson learned, time to find my soulmate.

I understand why you say what you did, but I don't necessarily agree with you. Maybe it was easier overall for you because you're a woman (nobody even pays any attention to me anymore), maybe it's something else entirely. But in my experience, it does not become easier the more my heart breaks. It's just more bad s**t for my brain to re-live over and over again. Eventually my heart will break so much that there won't be any heart left and i'll become a caricature of Dr. House, except without the insanely good doctor skills to backup the douchey attitude.

Rob-N4RPS
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25 Dec 2011, 7:47 pm

Having had my heart broken too many times to even count anymore, it may get easier over time, but it never gets easy.

Rejection takes a toll, no matter how many or few you go through. You get to where you don't want to reach out to anyone anymore, because you know what's ultimately going to happen.

Merry Christmas to All!

Rob

ManicMinx
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26 Dec 2011, 12:25 am

Well, ok I see what you mean. I take it back because I felt every heart break the same way. I just learned how to recover from it faster over time. It used to take me a long time to get over someone, but after so many heartbreaks I learned to move on faster because I realized that when someone doesn't like you back nothing is going to change that.

ManicMinx
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26 Dec 2011, 12:28 am

nick007 wrote:

Tim_Tex wrote:

I am sorry it didn't work out. I hope you can find Mr. Right some day.

Thanks, same here. I love meeting new people on this forum and would love to get to know you guys. I'm happy to have met a whole bunch of people that I can actually relate to.

nick007
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26 Dec 2011, 1:35 am

ManicMinx wrote:

nick007 wrote:

Tim_Tex wrote:

I am sorry it didn't work out. I hope you can find Mr. Right some day.

Thanks, same here. I love meeting new people on this forum and would love to get to know you guys. I'm happy to have met a whole bunch of people that I can actually relate to.

I think this forum can be a great way to meet people to. I met my 2nd girl on here & I'm hoping I can find someone else on here but I'm not going to limit myself to this forum. I'm not sure what your looking for in a partner but I'm mostly looking for someone who will try to make a relationship work with me

ManicMinx
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26 Dec 2011, 1:47 am

I love guys who are fun, and usually those types of guys are hyperactive or something. Oh well! LOL I gotta find my soulmate, Daffy Duck.

Tim_Tex
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26 Dec 2011, 2:19 am

Classic Daffy Duck, or the one from the new Looney Tunes Show?

Anyway, don't rush into finding someone new, take some time off and enjoy yourself.

nick007
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26 Dec 2011, 2:40 am

ManicMinx wrote:

I love guys who are fun, and usually those types of guys are hyperactive or something. Oh well! LOL I gotta find my soulmate, Daffy Duck.

It defiantly ain't me. I'm no fun at all

Northeastern292
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26 Dec 2011, 10:42 am

Not all relationships will work out. I've been in three, the longest not even being a full three months. But after getting through the mourning stage, I felt like a new guy. Everything seemed richer. Use that time to find yourself, your interests, etc. Take time to relax. And then jump back into the dating scene.

NOTE: This is my first WP post in months. I have to remind myself to start posting on here more often.

ManicMinx
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26 Dec 2011, 1:11 pm

@Tim Tex - definitely classic Daffy Duck
@Northeastern - Thanks, I'm really excited about this coming year. I'm going to really try to enjoy my time alone since I haven't felt comfortable being by myself since high school. The alcohol sent me on a downward spiral, so I'm going to take better care of myself this time around.

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