I'm tired of this s**t!

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I'm tired of being ugly and undateable (not a word, don't really care). I'm tired people (male and female) rubbing it in my face about their "dates" or hookups. I'm tired of being slow and stupid, and not knowing how to have a conversation and keep people interested.

I'm tired of being an uneducated, mentally ill bum that no one respects or views as their equal.

I'm tired of not having the skills and wherewithal to take care of myself, (can't drive, doesn't bathe and change clothes regularly) so I'm probably going to have to live off SSI and welfare for the rest of my life.

I'm tired of not having any friends and having both genders (mostly females) repulsed by me. I'm tired of not being normal. I'm so f*****g sick and tired of feeling lonely, bitter, depressed, and suicidal all the time.

Man I just I feel like taking a sledge hammer or an axe, and tearing through one of the walls inside my room.

What's so maddening and frustrating is that I can't change any of this crap. I'm basically stuck this way until I'm dead, or at the rate I'm going, commit suicide.

Well, I've given you advice numerous times.

Anyway, my last advice is. What can you change? What is in your power to change? If you can find something, anything in your power that you can change to be the way you want, do it, regardless of how trivial it seems. For me anyway, I can't solve my various social issues and general "weirdness" very easily, so instead of trying super hard to fix an almost unfixable problem, I instead put forth my effort into working out, which then raised my self image. You have to figure out what you have the power to change, even if it's trivial, and change it.

Really though, the fact you're in a "black" neighborhood pretty much is 90% of your problem. If you can find like, an anime club or something at a college in your area, you'd probably make some friends there. Bathing would help, but there's other people in anime clubs that don't bathe. Bathing is always a plus, though, hint hint.

But yeah, change what you can, and don't concentrate on what you can't. To an extent, though, some people are more driven than others. Helen Keller would be an example, she obviously had it much harder than any of us on this messageboard, and she managed to defeat her problems.

I'm a terrible motivational speaker, huh?

MR20

I find it interesting that you talk bad about your education but your posts are usually quite eloquent. (Ok, this thread might not be the best example), but you present yourself in writing much better than you think.

what's wrong with being from the ghetto?

i was like you once

I used to think life was so bad. I would just sit around in my room on the computer all day, doing nothing, getting no where. I'd convince myself I'm stupid, that i'm mentally ill and such.

Eventually I learned life isn't going to just come to me one day. No one's gonna feel sorry for me, date me or give me a huge sum of cash to get my life going somewhere.

So you know what I did?

I got off the computer. I found the motivation to go out and meet people and make friends. I got a job, and I stopped posting long rants on the internet hoping my life would someday just magically get better.

And, while I still feel as though there's more to my life I'd like to improve, I set a foundation for myself. I have a good job, car, I can support myself and I can continue to find the motivation to improve my life in other various aspects.

But I sure as hell didn't do it posting rants on message boards. I don't mean to sound harsh, I apologize if I do, but you need to learn life isn't going to come to you. If you're ugly, change your appearence. If you think you're fat, go running. If you're a bum, apply for jobs. If you're uneducated, buy some books. If you're lonely.. well, all 4 of the those you can accidentally bump into someone you can hold a conversation with. Sitting in your room at home won't change anything.

and I am tired of your threads.