Me & Megz broke up

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I'm not really sure what to say here because I'm still trying to understand it all. This distance is difficult & we probably wouldn't be able to be together offline much for quite a while partly due to her parents not wanting us to be alone together & a chance they would cut her off financially if we went against em. I've been having major problems sleeping since shortly after we got together because I really wished I was with her instead of sleeping by myself: actually I was having problems sleeping for quite a while before because I HATE sleeping by myself & that was one of the bigger reasons why I wanted a relationship. She's been pretty busy & stressed with school & sometimes kind of withdrawn; & I'm needy & clingy thou I have gotten a bit better since I started taking anxiety medication. I've been feeling like things are kinda one-sided at times for a while because I've been doing everything I can to try to make things work(I may of been trying waaay to hard instead of relaxing) & she can not put forth as much effort due to her focusing on school(which I am very supportive of) & other life circumstances. I've been unintentionally acting like a jerk towards her as a result of hurting over all that & I am extremely sorry for that. She doesn't think she can handle a relationship(not just with me but with anyone) because she's too independent & unwilling to compromise & that she cant give me the emotional intimacy/closeness I need. As much as I hate to admit it to myself; deep down I think we both may be better off without each other rite now. The last thing I want is to bring her down or hurt her in any way so I'm accepting we're over. I don't know what to do now. I still love her & I think I always will.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuI7H4h1htM[/youtube]

Sorry to hear that, Nick.

I'm really sorry about that. I can sort of understand how you feel. Your feelings will heal in time.

Thanx for your support.
This is my 2nd relationship & breakup I've been through. I've been handling things aLOT better than the 1st time thou I'm sill very for from perfect. Me & Megz had some arguments but we didn't really fight; we ended on good terms & I don't think I really hurt her or made anything worse for her; I hope with all my heart I didn't. I'm on anxiety medication so I'm not having bad panic attacks or fear I'll got crazy. I don't think I'll hurt myself but I put my scissors, box-cutter & knives in back my closet so It'll be harder for me to slash myself just incase I have a brief psychotic ep like I did 8 years ago; I doubt I would anyways thou. I'm a better person from our relationship & it would of been worth it if Megz feels the same. I'm a little mad at myself for doing anything that may of upset or hurt her & for not doing a better job with my clingy or other behavior. I feel depressed but I know I'll feel better. I want to cry myself to sleep but I want to be held & idea of going to bed alone scares me rite now. I wish i could just run away from my life but I know it's not practical so I won't.

Sorry to hear about this

Hang in there...

Well done Nick, I have never been in a relationship, but you seem to be reacting very maturely, whereas I hear a lot about people being emotionally damaged and finding great difficulty in breaking up. I was happy to read that you were in a positive relationship, and hope you enjoy some more.

Weird, just few days ago Megz was posting a thread about wedding rings......

....and now this?

Nick007 Im very sorry to hear about what happened.
Ive read her side of the story this morning and you both seem to be taking this pretty well, which is a good thing.

Im sure you learnt quite a few things about relationships from this one and hopefully you´ll eventually find a suitable partner that lives closer.

I was shocked to read the title of this thread. Sorry to hear it Nick :( By the looks of your original post you've handled things quite well, putting things into perspective very quickly so that's a positive

i'm so sorry Nick. don't blame yourself as it isn't your fault (sounds like it's nobody's fault - it just didn't work out). i am certain you brought joy into her life, so please try not to fixate on the negatives. it sounds like you are coming out the other end in ok shape so just keep trying to cope. maybe get some sleep if you can, as lack of sleep can lead to a meltdown or distortion or fixation. i know you're strong and you'll be ok (you too, Megz).

Nick, I'm sincerely sorry to hear this about you and Megz. Break-ups are never easy. I wish the best for both of you. I believe you are both great people. Take Care.

That sucks.