I refuse to hate him!!

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Joined: 12 Sep 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 631
Location: Australia

06 Dec 2011, 10:24 am

Idiot me went and did it again. Went and fell in love on line with an aspie....
At first it was cool, we got on great. but i developed feelings, he rejected me, that was cool. how could it work anyways i must have been kidding myself... But i found myself feeling love for him.
Not Limerence, actual love, which is so rare for me.
Anyways we got into a massive arguement..... Even though im really hurt both mentally and emotionally from the ordeal. I forgot how bad it can be to be on the wrong side of an angry aspergers male.... I got burnt. Hes convinced ill hate him but i cant convince him i will never hate him...

Im raised soo differently....
And He's prolly going to read this and hate me more...
Then why am I posting? IDK

I know i can never get him to love me, so i wont force him, all i can do is do what i know best and continue to show him my kind endearing heart. even though its beyond repair and its endurance is at the state at the thought of trying to talk to him now makes me want to throw up.

But I love him... Im going to endure this, take it as it comes and show this highly f****d up world that im here to face it head on!!

All i have to prove is that im here and im not going anywhere YOU HEAR THAT WORLD!! ! IM NOT GOING ANYWHERE!! !

blueroses
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06 Dec 2011, 10:34 am

How long ago did the argument happen? It sounds like you are still in the thick of it and that maybe, with time, you might be able to get some perspective and emotional distance from the situation.

Teredia
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06 Dec 2011, 10:37 am

blueroses wrote:

How long ago did the argument happen? It sounds like you are still in the thick of it and that maybe, with time, you might be able to get some perspective and emotional distance from the situation.

It happend about an hour ago well ended about an hour ago... prolly do just need time.... idk.... I hope thats all it is. I know most aspies are right after a couple of days head space.... me included but im gunna seriously bash myself up over this if he doesnt forgive me... he's a really valid friend...

Teredia
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06 Dec 2011, 10:41 am

why must i always have to complicate things....
I just want his friendship... :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Why is that so hard for an aspie male to understand >.<

The_Face_of_Boo
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06 Dec 2011, 11:25 am

It's ok, you can hate me.

Teredia
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06 Dec 2011, 11:40 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

It's ok, you can hate me.

thanks Boo. theres been many times ive wanted to hate u but i dont but thanks Boo =) you wise old face of boo xD

ictus75
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06 Dec 2011, 11:52 am

Teredia wrote:

why must i always have to complicate things....
I just want his friendship... :cry:

Why is that so hard for an aspie male to understand >.<

Some of us Aspies males just don't get it, the friendship and/or love thing. Maybe you can take it a bit easier, slow down, give him a little more space. I know I can feel crowded by too much social interaction.

Good luck!

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cinbad
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06 Dec 2011, 1:10 pm

What don't you get about it? I hate to sound all aspie, (but I am). Maybe I am curious because I don't get it. Is the difference so miniscule or so vast that they get frightened away from it like I do.

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bucephalus
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06 Dec 2011, 1:18 pm

Teredia wrote:

Idiot me went and did it again. Went and fell in love on line with an aspie....
At first it was cool, we got on great. but i developed feelings, he rejected me, that was cool. how could it work anyways i must have been kidding myself... But i found myself feeling love for him.
Not Limerence, actual love, which is so rare for me.
Anyways we got into a massive arguement..... Even though im really hurt both mentally and emotionally from the ordeal. I forgot how bad it can be to be on the wrong side of an angry aspergers male.... I got burnt. Hes convinced ill hate him but i cant convince him i will never hate him...

Im raised soo differently....
And He's prolly going to read this and hate me more...
Then why am I posting? IDK

I know i can never get him to love me, so i wont force him, all i can do is do what i know best and continue to show him my kind endearing heart. even though its beyond repair and its endurance is at the state at the thought of trying to talk to him now makes me want to throw up.

But I love him... Im going to endure this, take it as it comes and show this highly f**** up world that im here to face it head on!!

All i have to prove is that im here and im not going anywhere YOU HEAR THAT WORLD!! ! IM NOT GOING ANYWHERE!! !

Erm.. it would be impossible for anyone to give you advise without first knowing the exact reason for the argument. If this is just a vent rather than a question / topic of discussion then The Haven is the place to be. Nonetheless I hope it works out for you :) I'm sure you'll feel better once the red mist has cleared

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Wolfheart
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06 Dec 2011, 1:28 pm

Teredia wrote:

I know i can never get him to love me, so i wont force him, all i can do is do what i know best and continue to show him my kind endearing heart.

Some things aren't meant to be, if you feel that the relationship has gotten to a point where it's no longer productive or healthy for either of you, it's time to move on.

cinbad
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06 Dec 2011, 1:48 pm

Wolfheart wrote:

Teredia wrote:

I know i can never get him to love me, so i wont force him, all i can do is do what i know best and continue to show him my kind endearing heart.

Some things aren't meant to be, if you feel that the relationship has gotten to a point where it's no longer productive or healthy for either of you, it's time to move on.

I love how something that seems so complicated can be summed up into such a simple phrase.

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The_Face_of_Boo
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06 Dec 2011, 2:40 pm

Teredia wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

It's ok, you can hate me.

thanks Boo. theres been many times ive wanted to hate u but i dont but thanks Boo =) you wise old face of boo xD

Wait....I thought you were talking about me.

HopeGrows
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06 Dec 2011, 9:34 pm

Teredia wrote:

And He's prolly going to read this and hate me more...
Then why am I posting? IDK

OP, I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time. Because you seem to be implying that the object of your affection is a member here, I hope you'll reconsider your post and handle this matter directly with him. An ex posted things about me and our relationship. It hurt me terribly, and far from resolving any issues between us, it exacerbated the ones that already existed. It just made a bad situation unbearable. Good luck.

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Teredia
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07 Dec 2011, 1:29 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Teredia wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

It's ok, you can hate me.

thanks Boo. theres been many times ive wanted to hate u but i dont but thanks Boo =) you wise old face of boo xD

Wait....I thought you were talking about me.

Naa boo. Not you. you're always so helpful ^^

Last edited by Teredia on 07 Dec 2011, 1:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

Teredia
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07 Dec 2011, 1:30 am

cinbad wrote:

excuse me but am i coming accross to you as a NT female? sorry about that let me clear this up... Im also an AS female.....

Teredia
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07 Dec 2011, 1:37 am

HopeGrows wrote:

Teredia wrote:

And He's prolly going to read this and hate me more...
Then why am I posting? IDK

I know hes on here..... but i just really need to talk to some people who can somehow understand me, my AS Female mind that is freaking out and some help to understand an AS male a little better....
I could call up my friends, Jacob, Stephen or Simon.... but I dont wanna go running to them cause theyre only gunna call me a stupid idiot anyways... Seeking advice from a neutral source is always a lot better for me, cause those 3 aspies cant take it if their advice makes me burst into tears atleast on the forum, I can cry in private and no one but me will ever know!! !
I THAT UNDERSTANDABLE????

I tried sorting it out with him already thats what got me into this mess in the 1st place. Im not the most tactful person n im still learning how to act around male aspies... both online and in life...

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