Beauty without sex appeal

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This is something I have been suspecting for a long time, actually. I have heard from many people (both here on WP and outside) that I am a good looking man. Generally, when somebody finds out I have never had a girlfriend, they will usually ask something along the lines of "Why are you single? You are not ugly." Personally, I am not sure about my thoughts on my appearance: I am satisfied, I guess, but I sometimes have the urge to punch my face (do not worry, I never act on it), because I think it is very "punchable". Maybe I just dislike myself.

Anyway, something I have observed from all those people who have said I am handsome: most of them are heterosexual men or married/older woman who would not consider me sexually attractive. Very few women around my age have stated directly that they think I am good looking and there is a great chance I have misinterpreted the supposed signals from most of them. They could have been mocking me and I would not know for certain.

My conclusion is that I am good looking, but not in a sexually appealing way. Kind of like a pet or a kid, but less cute and more manly. Maybe it could help/have helped me in job interviews. Whatever it is, I do not know what makes me different from more "desirable" men: upon comparing popular guys from dating sites with me, the only major difference I could see was their body shape compared to my average build. My facial features do not put me too far from them, actually (my bone structure, lips and hair seem to be similar enough; my nose is the only real difference).

Of course, it brings a problem if I ever intend to have a relationship: physical attraction is the first thing people observe. According to my friends, I am a weird, but likeable guy. Unfortunately, I only become "likeable" if I am approached first. And I do not have the means to induce women to approach me, rendering my few redeeming qualities completely useless.

To be honest, there many other problems for me if I intend to be in a relationship, but I am already getting out of the scope of this topic.

You do look attriave but as many say that can only looks get you so far in the dating world. The same thing happens to me many people say I look attrive but I can only really connect with so little people so cant really expand for more potential relationships. Many of people I know say it all about connecting with other not just about looks all the time which might start the attraction to one other. But then relationships begain to continue with successful comuntion. As looks dont least forever but there are some older people with good looks. Everyone can have sex appal you just to know how to use without being creepy as it can be kind of hard for aspies but it can be done.

Your face looks punchable? Soo does that mean that you dont like your face or that you for some reason just think your face looks comfortable to plant your fist in?

Lord Voldemort is the only being capable of challenging every guy's heterosexuality. Admit it.

Redacted

I don't think you're "cute, but without sex appeal", Magnus Rex. But real life might be different. It all depends on your body language, voice, etc.

i have reached a very similar conclusion about myself

Magnus_Rex and MXH, you are both very good looking guys. I think what's happening is that you're both boyish for your ages, so *peers* are not finding you sexually attractive (or fewer than you would expect, given your good looks). That does not mean you are sexually unattractive, but it may be only lots of very young girls who find you so (look at those teen idol magazines, they're primarily bought by 13-14 year old girls, and contain nonthreatening boyish men who look younger than their chronological age).

It sucks, to be sure, but it doesn't mean you're sexually unattractive. And Magnus_Rex, I don't know where you got the idea that older/married women won't find you sexually attractive just because you're younger. Just 'cause they're older/married doesn't mean they don't still look. In fact, you may represent an unattainable nostalgic ideal to them, albeit not in a way they would ever act upon. Does that make sense?

Also, another poster said it: usually people safe/off the market are the most comfortable in making complimentary comments on others' situations. Then it's "helpful" and not "predatory" or "awkward".

ETA: Also, it depends greatly on individual taste. I *love* dark Caucasian guys, so you two are my bread and butter. But the other day, a Scandinavian man on this forum posted a picture of himself with his sister and I thought, "Wow, they are simply beautiful. Lovely, in an ethereal way." But I didn't think sexual thoughts because he's blond and fair. They looked like the elves of LOTR, more than anything, to me. Beautiful, but not in a tangible way.

Magus_Rex is sexc like a Rex.

Redacted

I don't know what to say. I'm married and (obviously) not looking, and plus, both Magnus Rex and MXH are way too young (not that I see that as a definite problem, though. ). But (and please don't get me wrong), both are the guys I'd totally hit on if I were 10 years younger and single.

Not sure how you seem in real life, though.