help :(

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Last edited by Stoccca on 03 Dec 2011, 9:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.

He sounds like a really difficult person, but you know this so I'll just leave it at that. If you really want him back, stop begging him, don't talk to him, and wait for him to contact you. If he doesn't contact you back, then that means that it's over and you shouldn't pursue things anymore. I know it's hard, but pressuring him is only going to drive him further away. Don't make yourself seem too available and play it off as if you're moving on. In the meantime, figure out better ways of talking to him so that if you DO talk to him again, he won't feel pressured and shut down.

I'm going to be very blunt here & say your post gives me the impression that he's been being a jerk to you & your using Aspergers as a way to excuse his behavior. There is nothing in your post to explain why you would want someone like that back. I think you should move on

all different advices... but thanks anyway... it's a very long story full of important details, he's not just jerk and he was not jerk all the time, just when I mentioned virginity and things he doesn't seem to want to talk about..btw, in our country everyone is a jerk, it's a kind of copy/paste behavior.
Why do you, for example, ignore someone if you do? I think it's just easier to say "f**k off", or no?

Usually when a man remains a virgin the cause is religious in nature. It could be that he is under-developed too. From the sound of it, you're getting less than you desire. If you want more intimacy, it's something you need to work through with this guy.

Oh right, because letting him know how much she wants him has really worked right? Being pushy is the worst way to get a guy, I know from personal experience and I've seen it happen time and time again to people I know. She needs to back off and let things happen naturally is what I'm trying to say. He might like her, he might not, but pestering him is obviously NOT working, so she should give him some space.

The poster above me is right. I made a mistake with an ex by being too clingy, partly because I tend to be a bit overly adoring and when I fall in love my partner becomes my new main interest (for a while in the early stages anyway until it settles down more later on and I become less clingy but still somewhat adoring instead).

They tend to run away screaming when you push or cling too much though...

I agree with this 100%.

Been there, done that. It doesn't work. It just takes enormous amount of energy and makes you feel emotionally exhausted.

You can't make someone love you or be interested in you, or treat you like you deserve. They either are interested and do love you, (on their own), or they don't. And it hurts like s..t when a person you care about and lust after and have strong feelings to don't reciprocate... But c'est la vie.

I agree with that advice to a point but she should NOT pretend to be less clingy than she typically is. If the guy cant handle clingyness at all & she has moments where she slips up & acts clingy; there are going to be major problems. They could be incompatible

I am NOT pushy, I have never, NEVER in my life pushed anyone, I am extremely tolerant and flexibile. I have never done anything "girly" in my life. My expectations were very, very small. This is not my fault. He changes his mind, he runs away, then he comes back, there are so many mixed messages. I nicely asked you to help me, so please try to answer this questions if you can:
When an aspie ignores someone, what someone should do?
When you ignore somebody, why do you do that?
Is there any psychologist on the internet who I could ask some questions for free?

It sounds like he's scared or doesn't know what he wants.
To answer the questions now~
I sometimes ignore people when I'm focusing on something else or daydreaming, I'm stressed out/overwhelmed/upset, I don't care about what the person has to say or I don't want to hear it. I think it's best for the person I ignore to give me my space & leave me alone because trying to get my attention when I'm focusing on something else, stressed out, or don't want to hear it or talk about it; upsets me

Oh God, I've watched some movies and read books, it's all the same, every Aspie behaves like him...f**k it, I can't mess with him anymore. Any psychologist to talk to here? Are there any medical explanation I can have on this?
I just don't understand why don't you just be there, be available for someone who loves you? There are no lots of girls that are ready to give up their dreams and be in a freaky relationship with someone that behave like that. Please, if someone wants you, be open, try to be flexibile. You have no idea what we're dealing with, it's so hard!